Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 13:15     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
If your kid has big dreams, you must apply widely. Start early. Be smart and strategic.

Applied to 22 schools:
5 safeties (admitted to 4; waiting on 1)
6 targets (admitted to 1; waiting on 5)
11 reaches (deferred ED1; waiting on all)
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 13:08     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
My parents told me I can go to any college I want and money is no object as they are not paying. True to work they not only did not pay they charged me rent and made me pay my share of bills to house once I turned 18.

Today as the parent the world has changed. Perhaps parents should get out of the college application and paying for college business.

That said I paid 100 percent first two kids and about to do it again for kid 3.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 12:56     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
Apply to a reasonable number of schools. It provides the opportunity to provide more tailored responses than approaching it as an assembly line. Have a good spread of reaches, targets and safeties.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 12:50     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
1) I didn’t really put much stock in the idea of kids “just knowing” a school was right for them on visiting but it happened to my kid and gave him a degree of motivation with regard to essays etc that surprised me. On paper the school wasn’t that different than many others we had visited.
2) My kid had excellent grades and scores, strongish but not amazing ECs and he picked a good school but one that is basically a straight up target rather than any kind of reach for him. A tiny part of me was inexplicably a bit disappointed he didn’t aim “higher” but I told that part to shut up. He’s very pleased with outcome and I think that he was wise to know that although he may have gotten into one of the higher ranked schools he was considering his personality fits better with the school he chose
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 12:25     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don't encourage the concept of a dream school or perfect fit or regale your student with stories of how amazing your college experience was.

My daughter and her friends got some impressive acceptances, but not necessarily the ones they wanted--this includes kids who were accepted through ED--the grass is always greener and hindsight is 20/20 after acceptances come out. There is going to be a feeling of "settling" versus going to a dream school for many students.

And many continue to have a less than great fall semester. Do not build up college too big as the transition is rough for many.


+1 DH and I both emphasized that it took a while to find our people and places on campus. The kids know my best friend from college and I let them know we didn't meet until junior year. Odds are, freshman year will be hard. Make that the expectation and then they can be pleasantly surprised if it's not.


+100 Social media images of kids having the time of their lives during the first few weeks of freshman year isn’t helpful. Good idea to be mindful of expectations and accepting the ups and downs that come with the adjustment to college.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 12:20     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
Anonymous wrote:That if you fall in love with a safety school, the process doesn't need to be stressful.


+1000
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 12:05     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
That if you fall in love with a safety school, the process doesn't need to be stressful.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 11:58     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
Anonymous wrote:Don't encourage the concept of a dream school or perfect fit or regale your student with stories of how amazing your college experience was.

My daughter and her friends got some impressive acceptances, but not necessarily the ones they wanted--this includes kids who were accepted through ED--the grass is always greener and hindsight is 20/20 after acceptances come out. There is going to be a feeling of "settling" versus going to a dream school for many students.

And many continue to have a less than great fall semester. Do not build up college too big as the transition is rough for many.


+1 DH and I both emphasized that it took a while to find our people and places on campus. The kids know my best friend from college and I let them know we didn't meet until junior year. Odds are, freshman year will be hard. Make that the expectation and then they can be pleasantly surprised if it's not.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 11:52     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
Don't encourage the concept of a dream school or perfect fit or regale your student with stories of how amazing your college experience was.

My daughter and her friends got some impressive acceptances, but not necessarily the ones they wanted--this includes kids who were accepted through ED--the grass is always greener and hindsight is 20/20 after acceptances come out. There is going to be a feeling of "settling" versus going to a dream school for many students.

And many continue to have a less than great fall semester. Do not build up college too big as the transition is rough for many.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 11:38     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
Follow your kid's lead. They may have very different ideas of where they want to go to school than your idea of what they should want from college. And they may be very happy with what you consider a "safety" - and that's OK.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 11:10     Subject: Re:Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
Anonymous wrote:If unhooked and eyeing the most rejective schools, get your own counselor if you can afford it. Yes, of course it’s possible to get in without one, but it makes the odds so much better and the process so much easier (especially for parents since the counselor does all the nagging). Love my DC to death, but frankly not sure they would‘ve made the cut without the counselor’s inside knowledge, making them write and rewrite an ungodly number of drafts of each prompt and even the activities/awards sections, etc. DC was accepted early to first choice HYPSM.


suggestions?
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 11:04     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
Our first kid went all in ED to a top-10 and got deferred, later rejected. Scrambled to EA get apps done in mid-December. Worked out fine but really stressful.

Second kid, similar stats. Did a few rolling early and got some decent early acceptances that took the pressure off. ED'd to a tier below top 10 where they would be happy and got in. Much more pleasant process.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 11:00     Subject: Re:Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
Anonymous wrote:If unhooked and eyeing the most rejective schools, get your own counselor if you can afford it. Yes, of course it’s possible to get in without one, but it makes the odds so much better and the process so much easier (especially for parents since the counselor does all the nagging). Love my DC to death, but frankly not sure they would‘ve made the cut without the counselor’s inside knowledge, making them write and rewrite an ungodly number of drafts of each prompt and even the activities/awards sections, etc. DC was accepted early to first choice HYPSM.


Money talks.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 10:59     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
Anonymous wrote:As the parent... be excited about several options and do not solely focus on the reach schools. Find a gem your kid will love at each level of difficulty: safety, target AND reach. Try to be authentically excited about all three. Your kid will take cues from you so even if you have to FAKE it - get excited about multiple schools at a variety of levels.

Discuss $$$ early on. No reason for heartbreak if your kid gets into a school and you cannot pay for it. Avoid this at all costs (literally and figuratively!) This also makes the entire process more enjoyable - if you are realistic about money.


+1000 For finances!
By junior year, you need to let your kid know where they stand. No point in applying to a 90K/year school that doesn't give much (or any merit) if you can only afford $40K/year and have HHI of $250K+. Find schools that you will be able to afford---if you allow them to apply to other schools, the kid needs to know they cannot attend unless it's affordable.

Anonymous
Post 01/17/2025 10:55     Subject: Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025
Anonymous wrote:Kind of an edge case—but when looking at undergrad business programs, it's very important to consider whether students are accepted into and matriculate as freshmen directly into the business school.

In my experience, many students and parents don’t understand this, and our private school counselors also failed to mention it as a major consideration. My concern was: what if DC gets sick, has a bad freshman semester, etc., but chose the school based on the business major—then ends up getting rejected from the B-school and is forced to choose another major? UGA Terry was one of those schools. Great B-school, but only a 40% acceptance rate. DC just wasn’t really willing to roll the dice with other great options where they matriculated as an incoming freshman. Now a happy freshman already taking core classes in a great undergrad business school!


This applies to all majors. There are plenty of great schools, where 99% of the majors are open TO ANYONE. None of this direct admit or you will never get in to engineering/CS/business/STEm majors. Choose wisely. Given that many kids do switch majors, much easier to be at a school where they can easily do this.
Given that many who switch out of Engineering (Because it's too hard/not their thing) go to Business majors, but that needs to be a viable option at their school.