A lot of smart people are not ambitious. They get credentials to obtain jobs that pay better-than-average, have stability, and give them freedom to think about things, including their own ideas. The best fit is oftentimes a high-level technical role in the federal government.

Yes. It’s really unfortunate that people judge people by their school, but they do. There is an unwritten assumption that smart AND ambitious people find their way to the top.

If you are smart, but not ambitious, then you probably ended up at a lower-ranked college, got some merit, work a federal government job, and drive a Honda. If you’re ambitious, but not super smart, you probably ended up at a no-name school, but started a business or became a salesperson, and drive a Tahoe. But, if you’re smart AND ambitious, you probably went to a top-30 school, became a top professional in your field, and drive a Mercedes/BMW. Totally stereotypical, but it has some truth to it.

Anonymous wrote:
For some people, not all.

Interestingly, the people I know who went to Ivies are the least wealthy of my acquaintance

Same. Mostly government. Though the Princeton finance guys do fare pretty well.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Usually. It’s a key data point

For what? In what age group is this true?

It just tells me about a person. Similar to what state they grew up in or what their parents did for a living. Draws a picture for me. I’m not necessarily judging them negatively if the school is unimpressive, nor am I judging them positively if it is impressive. It’s a puzzle piece.

+1. It's a thing that tells you a little bit about someone. It's mildly interesting in the same way that knowing their hobbies or where they've lived is. People here are very quick to assume something is about "judgement," but I don't see that kind of judgement in my day to day life at all.

For some people, not all.

Interestingly, the people I know who went to Ivies are the least wealthy of my acquaintance

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Close family and longtime friends I do just because of longevity. Neighbors and coworkers only if it has come up in conversation and often that’s due to something sports related. I don’t sit and discuss where people went to college in general. Once you’re past 30, other than in the context of interviewing, why does anyone care or talk about college.

To judge you. It's like knowing how much someone's house costs via Zillow.

I usually know both. NP. I'm nosy and bored. It's public info.

Generally, yes, but I also grew up in the DC Catholic school scene and that’s much more important.

Coworkers, yes, because it is a non-contentious topic to make small talk about when we run out of other things to say - it tends to come up in the context of kids' college searches. N
Not friends I have made later in life, unless it happens to come up, and not neighbors unless they put out a school flag or similar.

Anonymous wrote:Usually. It’s a key data point

That attitude is a key data point for some of us, PP.

Do you know where your friends, extended family, coworkers, neighbors, others, went to college?

Extended family: I know where most of my first cousins went to college, I think. Some of them I just know "somewhere in PA or Delaware" but for others I know the name. I know where my parents and one aunt and uncle went. No clue where grandparents or other aunts and uncles went.

Friends: with some I know the specific college, and for others I just know "somewhere in Seattle/CA" and yet for others have no clue.

Coworkers: If they are a lawyer at my law firm I can look it up on our website. If they're anything other than a lawyer I'd have to ask. I wouldn't though.

Neighbors: I don't know any of my neighbors.

Misc: I don't seek out this information because it's totally irrelevant to anything at all. I've known stupid people from Yale and brilliant people from McGill. Whether you went to college or where you went is not an indication of intellect.

Friends, some now only because it became a topic of conversation when our kids started going through the process. We may have talked about it early in our acquaintance but I didn't care enough to remember who went to a state U vs ivy vs SLAC. (Most of my local friends I met in early -mid 30s through kid stuff).

Coworkers, only if I was involved in hiring.

Neighbors, no idea unless they have a sticker/license plate holder on their car

Family, I know where most of my cousins went but not all their kids.

Anonymous wrote:I know for a handful of them, but not that many (with the exception of family that you included on your list). That’s why I find it weird people here are so obsessed with it.

This.

Friends and family - yes all of them
Coworkers - only a handful
Neighbors - only a few

So basically the closer I am with someone with on a personal level it will come up but otherwise in day-to-day life it doesn’t matter and no one seems to care.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Usually. It’s a key data point

For what? In what age group is this true?

It just tells me about a person. Similar to what state they grew up in or what their parents did for a living. Draws a picture for me. I’m not necessarily judging them negatively if the school is unimpressive, nor am I judging them positively if it is impressive. It’s a puzzle piece.

Anonymous wrote:Usually. It’s a key data point

Key data point for what? I would judge you for caring.