Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:55
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Who owns the beach house?
OP here. My wife and I own the house and have for 4 years. We pay the taxes, the insane insurance, and I alone handle all of the repairs of which there is plenty. The upkeep runs about 10 grand a year minimum and I easily spend a week's labor dealing with the petty stuff like plumbing leaks, rotted deck board, replacing shingles, grading the drive, dock repairs, etc. As anyone who owns a beach house will tell you- the upkeep is constant. Salt water and wind destroy most things.
Who owns this house on paper? Was there an actual transaction recorded whereby he transferred his interest in the property to you and your wife? If not, then you need to consult a lawyer and work this out before you try to deny him physical access to the house.
From OP's description, he never had an interest. There were three properties in the estate. Two were sold. When the proceeds were split, the brother received $400k more instead of a half share of the beach house, which then passed from the estate to OP's wife (and then to OP jointly). There is no need to make this complicated at all.
If northern nam is on the deed he still owns half.
Brothers name
Op hasn’t confirmed, but that’s unlikely. Why would they have put the brother’s name on the title when they bought him with the estate proceeds?
I don't think it's likely that the brother's name is on the deed, but what if OP and his DW never changed the deed into their names for some tax purpose. He said they took 400K less from the inheritance amount. It needed to have been documented that the 400K less was for the outright purchase of the beach house.
Clearly BIL is scrambling to look impressive. He isn't thinking straight.
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:50
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Please. He just wants to look like a big shot for free. Tell him if he really cares he can rent a beach house for the kids, though I'm sure he's too cheap to do that.
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:48
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Who owns the beach house?
OP here. My wife and I own the house and have for 4 years. We pay the taxes, the insane insurance, and I alone handle all of the repairs of which there is plenty. The upkeep runs about 10 grand a year minimum and I easily spend a week's labor dealing with the petty stuff like plumbing leaks, rotted deck board, replacing shingles, grading the drive, dock repairs, etc. As anyone who owns a beach house will tell you- the upkeep is constant. Salt water and wind destroy most things.
Who owns this house on paper? Was there an actual transaction recorded whereby he transferred his interest in the property to you and your wife? If not, then you need to consult a lawyer and work this out before you try to deny him physical access to the house.
From OP's description, he never had an interest. There were three properties in the estate. Two were sold. When the proceeds were split, the brother received $400k more instead of a half share of the beach house, which then passed from the estate to OP's wife (and then to OP jointly). There is no need to make this complicated at all.
If northern nam is on the deed he still owns half.
Brothers name
Op hasn’t confirmed, but that’s unlikely. Why would they have put the brother’s name on the title when they bought him with the estate proceeds?
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:45
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:My wife's father died four years ago, her mother died 6 months later. The estate was large and included a big house in upper NW, a simple beach house in NC and a 2 bed Co-Op in Grammercy Park.
She has a brother (childless) living in Seattle. We are here in DC and have 3 kids. Neither my wife nor her brother wanted the NY apartment or the DC house. We wanted the NC beach house. He didn't, despite spending many summers there as a boy.
He was fine to have the proceeds of the sale of the other two properties distributed accordingly so we could have the beach house. Basically, we took ~$400,000 less than he did during the sales and called the beach house ours. Everyone was happy.
Now, he is dating a woman that is, ironically, from eastern NC; although, she lives in Seattle. She has a 20 yo son from a previous marriage living in NC. Long story short- my BIL has offered this kid and his frat brothers our beach house for the summer. We have never even met him. I told him no before I even spoke with my wife. Later, when I told my wife, she elevated it to a "hell no".
Now he's fuming and accusing us of 'taking' his 'childhood beach house'
How do you even begin to address an asshat like this?
OP, is there any possibility that the adopted son works in the intelligence community (IC) and needs to use said beach house as a surveillance point/dead drop for a particular investigation or ongoing situation? BIL may be trying to acquire use of the house on these friendly terms so that IC personnel can get “eyes on” target(s) without attracting attention. If so please consider your nation, This America, and take the high road. TIA
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:45
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Who owns the beach house?
OP here. My wife and I own the house and have for 4 years. We pay the taxes, the insane insurance, and I alone handle all of the repairs of which there is plenty. The upkeep runs about 10 grand a year minimum and I easily spend a week's labor dealing with the petty stuff like plumbing leaks, rotted deck board, replacing shingles, grading the drive, dock repairs, etc. As anyone who owns a beach house will tell you- the upkeep is constant. Salt water and wind destroy most things.
Who owns this house on paper? Was there an actual transaction recorded whereby he transferred his interest in the property to you and your wife? If not, then you need to consult a lawyer and work this out before you try to deny him physical access to the house.
From OP's description, he never had an interest. There were three properties in the estate. Two were sold. When the proceeds were split, the brother received $400k more instead of a half share of the beach house, which then passed from the estate to OP's wife (and then to OP jointly). There is no need to make this complicated at all.
If northern nam is on the deed he still owns half.
Brothers name
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:45
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Who owns the beach house?
OP here. My wife and I own the house and have for 4 years. We pay the taxes, the insane insurance, and I alone handle all of the repairs of which there is plenty. The upkeep runs about 10 grand a year minimum and I easily spend a week's labor dealing with the petty stuff like plumbing leaks, rotted deck board, replacing shingles, grading the drive, dock repairs, etc. As anyone who owns a beach house will tell you- the upkeep is constant. Salt water and wind destroy most things.
Who owns this house on paper? Was there an actual transaction recorded whereby he transferred his interest in the property to you and your wife? If not, then you need to consult a lawyer and work this out before you try to deny him physical access to the house.
From OP's description, he never had an interest. There were three properties in the estate. Two were sold. When the proceeds were split, the brother received $400k more instead of a half share of the beach house, which then passed from the estate to OP's wife (and then to OP jointly). There is no need to make this complicated at all.
If northern nam is on the deed he still owns half.
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:44
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Pretty odd of him to assume you weren’t planning to use it yourselves over the summer.
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:38
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
The answer was no.
The end.
The end.
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:35
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
You don’t co-own it, your wife is the owner. Her inheritance, not yours. So her decision.
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:25
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My wife's father died four years ago, her mother died 6 months later. The estate was large and included a big house in upper NW, a simple beach house in NC and a 2 bed Co-Op in Grammercy Park.
She has a brother (childless) living in Seattle. We are here in DC and have 3 kids. Neither my wife nor her brother wanted the NY apartment or the DC house. We wanted the NC beach house. He didn't, despite spending many summers there as a boy.
He was fine to have the proceeds of the sale of the other two properties distributed accordingly so we could have the beach house. Basically, we took ~$400,000 less than he did during the sales and called the beach house ours. Everyone was happy.
Now, he is dating a woman that is, ironically, from eastern NC; although, she lives in Seattle. She has a 20 yo son from a previous marriage living in NC. Long story short- my BIL has offered this kid and his frat brothers our beach house for the summer. We have never even met him. I told him no before I even spoke with my wife. Later, when I told my wife, she elevated it to a "hell no".
Now he's fuming and accusing us of 'taking' his 'childhood beach house'
How do you even begin to address an asshat like this?
A) Rich people's problems, tiny violin. B) Ask him if he'd like to return $200K in order to have 50% use of the beach house, also entailing 50% of property taxes and upkeep moving forward. But that would never translate to more than half the summer.
This. He could buy into the beach house with his part of the estate.
OP here.
He had the chance and didn't want it. That door closed. I'm not interested in co owning a place with a guy that lives clear across the country and feels he can lend it out to whomever he feels. No way, no how. It's ours, not his.
NP. Just verifying that you and your DW are the only two on the deed, correct?
DP and I'd like to get this confirmed by OP as well. He says he and DW own it, but if it's only an agreement and not a deed--well, even then, the BIL would have zero moral right to expect use of the house. But he could get nasty about legalities. I'm figuring OP/DW do have a deed, though.
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:22
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
I have multiple family members with beach houses. None of them would let their own sons party there alone with friends. One offered it to her future daughter in law for her bachelorette party but did NOT let her own son have his bachelor's party there!
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:18
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:On what planet does anyone think it’s OK to offer up someone else’s house? What bizarre behavior!
+1
And to a girlfriend's son and his frat bros. Hard no.
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:14
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
BIL is wrong. But I’m impressed at how whipped his GF has him.
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:12
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Who owns the beach house?
OP here. My wife and I own the house and have for 4 years. We pay the taxes, the insane insurance, and I alone handle all of the repairs of which there is plenty. The upkeep runs about 10 grand a year minimum and I easily spend a week's labor dealing with the petty stuff like plumbing leaks, rotted deck board, replacing shingles, grading the drive, dock repairs, etc. As anyone who owns a beach house will tell you- the upkeep is constant. Salt water and wind destroy most things.
Who owns this house on paper? Was there an actual transaction recorded whereby he transferred his interest in the property to you and your wife? If not, then you need to consult a lawyer and work this out before you try to deny him physical access to the house.
From OP's description, he never had an interest. There were three properties in the estate. Two were sold. When the proceeds were split, the brother received $400k more instead of a half share of the beach house, which then passed from the estate to OP's wife (and then to OP jointly). There is no need to make this complicated at all.
It was left to him in the will, so he had an interest. It's unclear from OP's explanation whether the arrangement was anything beyond an agreement. The law is what might make it complicated.
Anonymous
01/09/2025 19:03
Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Who owns the beach house?
OP here. My wife and I own the house and have for 4 years. We pay the taxes, the insane insurance, and I alone handle all of the repairs of which there is plenty. The upkeep runs about 10 grand a year minimum and I easily spend a week's labor dealing with the petty stuff like plumbing leaks, rotted deck board, replacing shingles, grading the drive, dock repairs, etc. As anyone who owns a beach house will tell you- the upkeep is constant. Salt water and wind destroy most things.
Who owns this house on paper? Was there an actual transaction recorded whereby he transferred his interest in the property to you and your wife? If not, then you need to consult a lawyer and work this out before you try to deny him physical access to the house.
From OP's description, he never had an interest. There were three properties in the estate. Two were sold. When the proceeds were split, the brother received $400k more instead of a half share of the beach house, which then passed from the estate to OP's wife (and then to OP jointly). There is no need to make this complicated at all.