Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 13:45     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
Background history- my dad has severe depression, had multiple suicide attempts, and had to do inpatient treatment.

When I was in college, I was r*ped and a few months later when I was ready to try sex again with my long term boyfriend, it resulted in me having a panic attack and he said "see I always knew you were destined to end up f**king crazy like your dad". I've done SO much therapy and have never been able to let go of that.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 13:38     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
Anonymous wrote:My H cheated on me while I was pregnant and for 6 months after. When I asked why, his reason was “she can talk about literature and The Hero’s Journey”.


Cheating on your pregnant wife is The Scoundrel's Journey though.

Was there no indication when you were dating that he wanted to talk about literature etc.? This seems like an excuse manufactured after the fact.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 11:24     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
My SIL (my brother’s wife), with a smile on her face, suggested me to work cleaning bathrooms on my journey emigrating to another country. My brother turned his face to her in disbelief but said nothing. This was the day before of my flight.

Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 10:44     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
I am a black teacher within the DMV. I hear racial slurs all the time directed towards myself, other teachers and other students. I can’t tell you how many times I got called a n*** teacher or a black monkey. It is absolutely disgusting and makes me sick. Even coming from children, it hurts. They will look you dead in the eye and say it.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 10:41     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:As a teenager when I heard my father laugh on the phone with a coworker and I mentioned to my mom that it sounded so phony and weird. Without missing a beat she said, "Daddy stopped laughing the day you were born."

Oh, and when I had to wear a baseball hat for my job at an ice cream shop, so I put my hair in a braid and pulled it through the hole on the hat. On my way to work my mother told me it looked "like a log of sh*t."


Not that you hold a grudge or anything. If this is the worse you got, not feeling too sorry for you.

Maybe this thread isn't about getting people to feel sorry for you, just expressing sadness over words that hurt you. Just because you've had someone say worse doesn't mean these things don't hurt.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 10:38     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My husband said that his brother “married up”. I still feel like shit when I think about that.


As opposed to your husband? That’s mean. But I wish that were the meanest my DH had said to me.

After I basically started crying after he said that, he kept saying that wasn't what he meant. She did come from a wealthy family, and she did become a lawyer (breadwinner). He also didn't say "compared to you", but it definitely seems like he thinks his brother got the better end of the stick. I think the exact words were "Larlo was smart, he married up".
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 10:35     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
Ex-DH: I only stayed with you out of guilt and pity.

With that, 20+ years of my life were irreparably tainted.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 10:32     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:As a teenager when I heard my father laugh on the phone with a coworker and I mentioned to my mom that it sounded so phony and weird. Without missing a beat she said, "Daddy stopped laughing the day you were born."

Oh, and when I had to wear a baseball hat for my job at an ice cream shop, so I put my hair in a braid and pulled it through the hole on the hat. On my way to work my mother told me it looked "like a log of sh*t."



Not that you hold a grudge or anything. If this is the worse you got, not feeling too sorry for you.


I had the same thought but didn’t want to be an outlier!


These are horrible and damaging things to hear from your mom. Ignore these PPs.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 10:14     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
Anonymous wrote:My H cheated on me while I was pregnant and for 6 months after. When I asked why, his reason was “she can talk about literature and The Hero’s Journey”.

I could have handled something real like he felt neglected, or wasn’t happy with our sex life. But the way he said it was a flat out “she is smarter and more special than you, and you are just a boring housewife with no interesting qualities”.

During reconciliation he told me he couldn’t feel romantic about me because I didn’t listen to the same music, read the same books, or watch the same movies.

(He fancied himself the deep tortured artist type, while I’m mostly into pop culture).

Also when asked what he liked about me, he couldn’t come up with a single thing.

Those three things stick out - just making it blatantly obvious that he’s at a level above me.

Funny thing is, after all of that I ended up making quite a bit of money writing and worked on some projects with a film studio. Meanwhile he’s been talking for years about all these big art projects he’s working on but he’s never completed a single one.

When I saw the Barbie movie last year it finally clicked - he’s one of those guys who just wants a woman to fawn over how much he knows about The Godfather.


Good grief he sounds insufferable.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 10:10     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
Anonymous wrote:Here’s mine: DH telling me that he’s glad when I die and that neither he nor the kids will miss me. Upon saying that this is hurtful he said who will miss the witch. This was following a health scare. I just can’t unhear this.


Why. Are. You. Still. Married?

Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 10:09     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:As a teenager when I heard my father laugh on the phone with a coworker and I mentioned to my mom that it sounded so phony and weird. Without missing a beat she said, "Daddy stopped laughing the day you were born."

Oh, and when I had to wear a baseball hat for my job at an ice cream shop, so I put my hair in a braid and pulled it through the hole on the hat. On my way to work my mother told me it looked "like a log of sh*t."



Not that you hold a grudge or anything. If this is the worse you got, not feeling too sorry for you.


I had the same thought but didn’t want to be an outlier!
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 10:08     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
Anonymous wrote:One day I was riding in the car with my exDH and he was upset about something and said….I want to bash your head into the steering wheel. I was shocked. He’d never spoken to me like that before. It was clear that he hated me. That was the beginning of the end of our marriage. And he did in fact physically attack me shortly after. So listen up when someone talks like that.


Holy sh*t.

I’m so sorry.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 10:05     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
Anonymous wrote:As a teenager when I heard my father laugh on the phone with a coworker and I mentioned to my mom that it sounded so phony and weird. Without missing a beat she said, "Daddy stopped laughing the day you were born."

Oh, and when I had to wear a baseball hat for my job at an ice cream shop, so I put my hair in a braid and pulled it through the hole on the hat. On my way to work my mother told me it looked "like a log of sh*t."


Not that you hold a grudge or anything. If this is the worse you got, not feeling too sorry for you.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 09:27     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
You all need to go to therapy and do deep work on yourselves if you're still gutted from throw away comments from otherwise loving parents
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2024 09:23     Subject: Insults or hurtful words you can’t forget
I was with a guy who told me I was so worthless that he didn't want anyone to know about me, because he had a reputation to uphold. No he wasn't married.