Anonymous wrote:This could be such a nice archived resource if responses would stay on topic rather than asking OP about her parenting.

Housing. Just housing. Good grief DCUM.

Sorry, but are you fully caught up pp? It's not housing, just housing. Many times with questions of OP we actually get the fuller story. The subject and OP were missing the lede. With more info, those who have BTDT can assist. I incorrectly figured this string was about someone not diagnosed with ASD, but needing a supported group home.

Way to be an a$$hat PP. OP is in a very tough spot. If you are a parent of a child who has struggled with any form of addiction/mental illness/failure to launch, then you know it is difficult and that compassion is in order.

way to dribble out more facts OP.

OP here.

First off thank you for nice words.

Secondly, asking for information is not mean I intend to take immediate action. I am collecting information that may be helpful some day.

BPD 1 is diagnosis. Was using/abusing to treat his episodes for year plus - I mean all the drugs. Really bad. Has completed & not completed couple inpatient & outpatient programs.

So yeah. Hopefully in time he will be clean & the right Rx will help and he can find a good living situation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are residential places for failure to launch, if that's what you mean?

Yes.

(Until 2 years ago I would have thought DS was going to college.

HS was friends, sports, extra curriculars, did school work.

Came home after first semester of college with no intention of returning.

Not working. Not studying. Struggles with clinical depression.

It is sad. My efforts seem futile. So hoping to outsource help.
-OP

He’s not neurotypical; he’s depressed. Is his depression adequately treated?

Some of us have been on this rollercoaster. “Treatment” seems to work for awhile until they build a tolerance or the SSRI results in significant anxiety. After awhile you realize that the treatment can be as bad as the initial illness. Don’t be so naive about “adequate treatment”. Life has to move on.

You need a dual diagnosis drug rehab and then sober living house. Sober living houses have house managers, strict rules, usually help with finding jobs (my husband lived at one and they often will have warehouses work most residents can get help to get, mine worked at Amazon) , and do have a lot of the support you might be looking for here.

OP, your son sounds very similar to mine. 3 years ago he was hospitalized for drug induced psychosis. Attended
Mission for Michael, then out patient Sandstone and lived at rental they provided.

Michael was great, Sandstone was ok, the livin option was terrible because his main issue was depression, not drugs.

He came home, it was rough first year. we insisted he do therapy and no drugs. He did therapy 2x week, went back to drugs, another hospitalization, then back home.

The third hospitalization the doctors diagnosed him bipolar II. Got him on proper meds and he’s been stable since. He has a job, a nice girlfriend and will start community college this Spring.

My point is depression is horrible and it sounds like your son is self-medicating. He needs a loving home, but you also have the right to insist on boundaries. Get him in therapy, get yourself in therapy or better yet, individual for him, family for you, dad, sister.

It’s a lot of work. I hope you the best.

OP - Until t
Your so. Strops using it is going to be hard to find housing options. He is an adult and you need to connect him with the MD if there equivalent of Virginia’s Community Services Board that handles those with substance abuse and mental health issues.
There may be waiting lists for individual or group therapy and possibly a day program.

Since he is still on your health insurance, you might see if any private day program such as The Dotm he might be served at.

I think you need therapy to help you set a tone in your home that recognizes your 12 year old daughter’s rights and safety as well as DS’s. He needs to have rules to follow to remain in your home which should mean taking some steps to stop using. It eoukd be good to learn where the homeless shelters and food meals are and give him a list to show you are serious.

Also, if using, there should be no access to a car that you own or pay insurance on as you will be liable. You should join NAMI to get the moral support for the hard path ahead.

A

There are a few options:

The Dorm
Palisades House
A Mission for Michael

Op you need to join NAMI

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What about a supportive housing situation like Mansfield Hall?

https://mansfieldhall.org/about/

Thank you. -OP

I have a friend whose son is at this program in Wisconsin. It is going well.

Anonymous wrote:OP is deranged, going right to a "reality" TV show as her model. I see why the kid is having so much trouble growing up.

They might just be really, really selfish.

The rehab staff will have local recommendations for halfway houses.