Anonymous wrote:I do all that and more to all kinds of people and definitely to guys I'm attracted to. As long as you aren't actually predatory and going after the guy or parking outside his house or work or planning on how to murder his wife, what's the harm? I have drawn the line for myself at actually paying for info like a PI would on the internet but if it's out there and it's free and easy to get, why not?

But why? Why are you so nosey? Don't you have anything better to do?
You're pathetic.

Anonymous wrote:I looked up my coworker’s home address, and drove by his house.

He told me his son made JV basketball and what school he played at, so I watched a game online.

My coworker gave a talk, which was later posted on YouTube. He told me about it, so I watched it and made a screenshot of him and saved it to my phone.

I looked up what his wife does. She’s also a physician, but at a different hospital.

Nothing is illegal. Everything is out there for anyone to see. He shares info with me, then I find a little more. Am I a stalker?

You are extremely weird, at the very least.

Look up LIMERANCE.

It's obsessive and has a life of its own.

BTDT. But since this is a person who could find out you have go stop because you will have bad consequences if anyone does find out.
Best wishes go you.. really.

Just stop. It’s stalking. You see the guy at work. Don’t be that freak.

Does his kids have any bunny rabbit pets?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he or your boss found out they would think less of you. So you should stop before they find out.

If I were this guy and found out all of this was happening it would be logged with HR. It may not have crossed the line yet, but I'd start the paper trail. So I'd take it a little further than just thinking less of you.

The saved photo and driving by his house cross the line. The other stuff is not great when taken together (definitely an unhealthy obsession) but the photo and driving past his house (assuming it's not just on OP's way to things) take it from a crush with light Google stalking (not great but also pretty common I suspect) to full on creeper territory.

Anonymous wrote:OP, would you feel uncomfortable admitting this to your coworker? If yes, then I vote stalker.

I don't think that's the line, because even if OP hasn't done any of this but was still attracted to the coworker, she would probably be uncomfortable admitting it to him. I'm a private person -- there are tons of things I'd be uncomfortable to tell a coworker, doesn't mean I'm a stalker.

I think the metric is how OP would feel if someone they were not interested in did these things to her. I suspect no matter how "live and let live" you are, just about anyone would feel bothered to find out someone was driving by their home or had saved a photo of them on a phone. The online searching isn't as weird to me (there are innocent reasons someone might look up your spouse or watch a speech you gave) but the photo and the drive by cross a line.

Thank goodness for Page 2 of replies, because there were way too many posters on Page 1 saying, Whatever, kinda nosy. Like, what? She's tracking everyone in this man's family!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:why would you watch his son's basketball game??

This would freak me out the most

+1

What if your coworker was also there to watch his son's game and saw you? What would you have said to him?

She watched the game online.

Perhaps a borderline stalker.

If such a term of reference exists. 🤷🏻‍♂️

Anonymous wrote:If he or your boss found out they would think less of you. So you should stop before they find out.

If I were this guy and found out all of this was happening it would be logged with HR. It may not have crossed the line yet, but I'd start the paper trail. So I'd take it a little further than just thinking less of you.

You are definitely near and possibly over the line of being creepy. Who watches the live streams of a co-worker's kid's basketball games? I would stay away from him and delete everything on your phone for your own sake before you get creepier.

*now^

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. Why are you doing all this?

He is really nice to me. I am attracted to him.

Anyway, he told me he lived 1.5 mi from a certain mall, so he told me the general area.

Mia you sound like a stalker. He’s married with a kid. Don’t be creepy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:why would you watch his son's basketball game??

This would freak me out the most

+1

What if your coworker was also there to watch his son's game and saw you? What would you have said to him?