Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every popular person is extraverted. The rest varies considerably.

Ugly extroverts are not popular sorry

No, I have seen some teens with charisma. That's the thing that draws people to them.

Sorry, prepping your kid with the "right" sports or "right" look (now I understand why this forum totally freaks out about acne) isn't enough to guarantee their popularity.

Nobody wants to hang out with an ugly person, regardless of charisma.

That's you speaking for yourself.
That's not what I've seen. Maybe my kids don't go to school in whatever freak world you live in.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every popular person is extraverted. The rest varies considerably.

Ugly extroverts are not popular sorry

No, I have seen some teens with charisma. That's the thing that draws people to them.

Sorry, prepping your kid with the "right" sports or "right" look (now I understand why this forum totally freaks out about acne) isn't enough to guarantee their popularity.

Nobody wants to hang out with an ugly person, regardless of charisma.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, my theory is that loud, fun, outgoing kids are the popular ones, and the really shy introverts are not popular. Is this your sense, too?

The "loud fun ones" are also the ones hooking up in the parks during football games.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every popular person is extraverted. The rest varies considerably.

Ugly extroverts are not popular sorry

No, I have seen some teens with charisma. That's the thing that draws people to them.

Sorry, prepping your kid with the "right" sports or "right" look (now I understand why this forum totally freaks out about acne) isn't enough to guarantee their popularity.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every popular person is extraverted. The rest varies considerably.

Ugly extroverts are not popular sorry

Extroversion is a personality trait - one of the big 5. It's not always obvious who is extroverted.

Anonymous wrote:Two boys - one loud, outgoing, extremely social the other quiet, hangs back. Both are excellent athletes in multiple sports and both are very popular. Unpopular opinion maybe, but IMO boys who are athletic = popular .

+1

5"11 17 years old high senior who is a multi-athlete, golf in the fall and soccer in the spring. He also played guitar in one of Ariana Grande rehearsals, and it was recorded. His popularity is off the chart.

Anonymous wrote:Every popular person is extraverted. The rest varies considerably.

Ugly extroverts are not popular sorry

Every popular person is extraverted. The rest varies considerably.

My "popular" senior son is athletic and funny.

But I think what makes him popular is that he is extremely social. He goes to every sporting event at school (that he's not playing in) and stands in the front row and cheers on the team. He goes to every single school extracurricular event. He hangs out with friends every Friday and Saturday night. He goes in to school at 7am every day to have breakfast (this is a private school that offers an optional breakfast.). He goes out to lunch with friends. midday. He travels with friends. And on an on and on.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Friendly, helpful, good at de-escalation, funny, smart, a little athletic (middle of the pack, but that comes easily to her). We live in San Francisco, where there's no such thing as popular but there is social and having friends vs not. I was really surprised to discover this lack of popularity, coming from the Northeast, but it's true. There are kids who are widely disliked, but it's for their behavior and treatment of others, rather than their looks. Quirky kids, handicapped kids, etc. all get included if they are nice.

If you and/or your kids think there is simply “social” or “not social” and there is not really a hierarchy or a popularity factor, I can assure you it is because they fall into the popular category and so therefore don’t even give it a thought. It’s non-existent to them.

“Can I just say that we don’t have a clique problem at this school….snd sone of us should t have to take this workshop because we’re just victims here….”
~Regina George

There really isn't a schoolwide hierarchy at DC's school which is in our area. There are groups that have parties and groups that don't and groups focused on certain interests like sports or history. I don't think the sports people are pining to be part of the history crowd or vice versa. Kids seem to have crushes on random kids within their group or not.

Oldest has many friends and has been "popular" since childhood. He is friendly, easy going, talkative and kind, parents describe him as charismatic. He's also athletic and good-looking which doesn't hurt either.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, my theory is that loud, fun, outgoing kids are the popular ones, and the really shy introverts are not popular. Is this your sense, too?

The really loud show offy kids who veer into obnoxious tend to be popular in middle school but have burned too many bridges by high school. The same kids popular in middle school don’t be the same as the ones in high school I’ve noticed. Although some kids in the popular social groups but not THE leaders of it often maintain their spots

+1 I was going to say the same. MS popularity is different from HS popularity. By the end of 9th grade, the loud, obnoxious, show offy kids have fallen down the social ladder. Both boys and girls.

The ones who are MS popular without that attitude can often remain HS popular. But then a whole new crop of people become popular. The game changes in HS.

Two boys - one loud, outgoing, extremely social the other quiet, hangs back. Both are excellent athletes in multiple sports and both are very popular. Unpopular opinion maybe, but IMO boys who are athletic = popular .

Not sure if your are asking about popular like the A group or popular like having a lot of friends.

My kid is in the second group, she is smart, reasonably outgoing and socially aware, i.e. she can easily pick up on other people's cues. I think lacking that ability can really make it tough in middle school to find friends.

The A team as we jokingly call them have parents who will buy whatever trend is happening the minute it comes out, are either able to cooly excluse other kids or put them down or are willing to turn a blind eye to it. They are "popular" but may not be widely liked as much as feared.

Tall (6’2), good looking senior with a great sense of humor. Kind, chill, not a grade grabber but smart. Played on some non-competitive teams (crew and rugby).