Anonymous wrote:Left my husband for my work crush (he was single). Best decision of my life. Everything about my relationship with my new husband is so much better than my old one. The respect, conversation, interests, fun, sex. We have kids together and I’m so glad I didn’t have kids with my ex husband. That would have been a disaster.

And yes, I did cheat on my husband with him. Worst decision of my life. I felt horrible about it and it made everything 10 times worse and the start of our relationship feels tainted. If you are thinking of it DON'T DO IT. Just leave your spouse first. I wish I had but I didn't have the courage and I didn't know what I wanted. Looking back it was definitely an exit affair. I am still glad I left me husband but I feel shitty for the way I did it. He paid about zero attention to me and didn't realize I was having an affair due to his own issues, though. An addiction to video games and I'm pretty sure depression.

Left my husband for my work crush (he was single). Best decision of my life. Everything about my relationship with my new husband is so much better than my old one. The respect, conversation, interests, fun, sex. We have kids together and I’m so glad I didn’t have kids with my ex husband. That would have been a disaster.

Anonymous wrote:Every time I see one of these posts, I know the op is a loser.

I feel like it’s normal to have crushes. Most people get over them and move on. Not a big deal.

Every time I see one of these posts, I know the op is a loser.

Let's be honest, these posts are some of the most pathetic topics posted here. Pathetic.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's a big difference between a crush and an EA/PA. For the most part, I think a crush is harmless as long as it does not get in the way of anyone doing their job in a fair and impartial manner.

Your partner probably disagrees. A crush takes energy out of the relationship.

NP. My wife and I talk about our work crushes all the time. We laugh at them. A middle aged parent falling in love with a 25 year old new hire who laughs at their jokes is objectively funny. Neither one of us has ever acted on them.

And that is because you talk about them! they lose their power when your spouse knows and gently teases you about Marc in Accounting.

ehh..I told my husband about a colleague I started to have feelings for so strong it scared me. I figured if he knows, then I can feel more safe in knowing it will go nowhere. That’s not really how it went.

Could you tell us how it went? I considered telling DH about a crush, but I didn't. I think if I did I wouldn't have crossed the line. That didn't work for you?

My affair ended when we got married. Things don't always end badly.

Got in a fight about something small that escalated. I made it clear we are not friends and I am just here to work.

I admit I escalated the fight because honestly, I wanted to end this crush/EA after so much time. I wanted him to think I’m a bad person, and no longer trust me.

Complication is that this was my boss so we still have to work very closely together. I’m not worried about being fired.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's a big difference between a crush and an EA/PA. For the most part, I think a crush is harmless as long as it does not get in the way of anyone doing their job in a fair and impartial manner.

Your partner probably disagrees. A crush takes energy out of the relationship.

NP. My wife and I talk about our work crushes all the time. We laugh at them. A middle aged parent falling in love with a 25 year old new hire who laughs at their jokes is objectively funny. Neither one of us has ever acted on them.

And that is because you talk about them! they lose their power when your spouse knows and gently teases you about Marc in Accounting.

ehh..I told my husband about a colleague I started to have feelings for so strong it scared me. I figured if he knows, then I can feel more safe in knowing it will go nowhere. That’s not really how it went.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's a big difference between a crush and an EA/PA. For the most part, I think a crush is harmless as long as it does not get in the way of anyone doing their job in a fair and impartial manner.

Your partner probably disagrees. A crush takes energy out of the relationship.

NP. My wife and I talk about our work crushes all the time. We laugh at them. A middle aged parent falling in love with a 25 year old new hire who laughs at their jokes is objectively funny. Neither one of us has ever acted on them.

And that is because you talk about them! they lose their power when your spouse knows and gently teases you about Marc in Accounting.

still going ..15+ years

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't even know what EA or PA means? From the context of comments it is some kind of AP?

At any rate, I had a very serious work crush 20 years ago. We are together and happily married.

But this wasn't a crush on a married person that may have evolved into an emotional or physical affair, right?

Neither of us were married.

Thanks for your perspective. If I may ask: was an unsatisfactory sex life with your DH a factor in the development of your crush/EA? If it was unsatisfactory, do you think that you would have fallen for the temptation, or that you would have had a harder time putting the crush behind, even with the distance?