Anonymous
Post 07/27/2024 06:01     Subject: Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
Yes you should get off for good
Anonymous
Post 07/27/2024 00:31     Subject: Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
Anonymous wrote:Do what you need to do.

Non-athletes generally won't have acceptances to elite schools until December.


Try April.

My kid got 2 Ivies, 2 T10s and a few T20s RD in the spring. Did not ED.

I have had many reaching out to ask where’s he’s going because he never posted to the school Instagram page and I never mentioned it on my own page which I seldom post.
Anonymous
Post 07/27/2024 00:28     Subject: Re:Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My unhooked kid ended up doing fantastic and headed to an Ivy next year…and never posted the outcome on Instagram. lol

It’s now 1 month before they go to college and literally everyone has forgotten all of that crap and comparison and nobody cares.



I doubt they are unhooked. Full pay is a hook.


Full pay means nothing at an Ivy. Literally nothing. They are needs blind admissions
Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 18:28     Subject: Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
I've heard of instances (rare) in which the coach does not follow through with the ED athletic applicant. Does announcing the plan help with that?
Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 17:34     Subject: Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
Anonymous wrote:committing to college for athletics is a different animal in my opinion. these kids will be "working" for their colleges, almost like having a job. their experience will be different. I'm happy for them if that's the path they want, but also don't feel any envy.




Building on this, while I'm sure it's nice to go have the college decision settled.bwfore senior year begins, it doesn't leave any room for pleasant surprises, i.e. the school your kid throws in the last-minute application tonl which winds up being "the one."
Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 13:01     Subject: Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
committing to college for athletics is a different animal in my opinion. these kids will be "working" for their colleges, almost like having a job. their experience will be different. I'm happy for them if that's the path they want, but also don't feel any envy.

Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 12:56     Subject: Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
I feel so proud of all the kids I know from my kid’s high school. Kids have found different places to go, some exploring new fields, some chasing long term passions. It’s really exciting to see where they have ended up. We are lucky in America to have so many options for higher education. No one school is “perfect” or the best. No one school is perfect for even one student; there are multiple paths any one kid can take to success. America also is a land of second chances, especially if you are willing to work hard and learn.
Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 12:36     Subject: Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
Anonymous wrote:My oldest is a rising Senior and some of their classmates have started to post their (VERY) impressive commitments to elite colleges for athletics. I know it's only going to get worse over the next couple of months as the non-athletes start getting acceptances as well.

The smart and rational half of my brain wants to be happy for these kids and to just focus on helping my kid get into a school that is the right school for THEM - academically, socially, etc. - but it's fighting with the jealous, petty, competitive side of my brain.

I really don't want the bad half of my brain to be driving the train for the next six months. It will make our whole family miserable and probably give my kid a complex. I don't want to be coming to my husband with anxiety and worry about this, as he is a WONDERFUL and grounded human and the least tiger parent of them all. Despite having gone to an Ivy for undergrad.

How do you all manage this?


It's a lot more fun to be proud of your friends than to be jealous, petty or competitive with them. My kid enjoys being on a couple of varsity sports, but won't get recruited. I'm glad he's learned to be genuinely happy for his friends and their accomplishments. He feels like they are good friends to him too.

Please stop yourself from being that toxic parent. There is so much to lose and so little to gain.
Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 12:29     Subject: Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
It will be a long year. Do what you need to do! Hang in there.
Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 12:25     Subject: Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OK I'm not on sm (except here) so help me out. You are following your KID's friends? That's weird. Does anyone think that's weird? If I did social media it would be to look at dogs or food trucks.



No, I'm friends with parents posting about their kids. Lord, I don't follow teenagers on social media.


A few teens (kids of friends) connected with me when they were 13. It’s very funny because they wanted to be on Facebook and have lots of connections but they had not realized all the kids were on instagram. lol.

They barely use Facebook now yet kept their accounts.

They are still connected to me, and they rarely post to FB.
Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 12:21     Subject: Re:Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
Anonymous wrote:My unhooked kid ended up doing fantastic and headed to an Ivy next year…and never posted the outcome on Instagram. lol

It’s now 1 month before they go to college and literally everyone has forgotten all of that crap and comparison and nobody cares.



I doubt they are unhooked. Full pay is a hook.
Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 12:18     Subject: Re:Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
Anonymous wrote:My unhooked kid ended up doing fantastic and headed to an Ivy next year…and never posted the outcome on Instagram. lol

It’s now 1 month before they go to college and literally everyone has forgotten all of that crap and comparison and nobody cares.



This is great perspective. They are all about to move to the next (very exciting stage) of their life. Where Larla from 12th grade homeroom went to college really doesn't matter.
Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 12:15     Subject: Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
Anonymous wrote:Yep. A known cheater from my children’s school committed to Swarthmore yesterday and, as I told my senior, it’s going to get worse before it gets better. I don’t have Instagram so I only know what she tells me and that is more than enough.

Not to single out Swarthmore, because this is typical for top SLACs, but since you did:

Proportion of URMs on Swarthmore sports teams:
Men’s Basketball
3/17
Men’s Tennis
0/15
Men’s Swimming
2/28
Women’s softball
1/17
Women’s basketball
5/15
Women’s Field Hockey
0/25

I could have gone on, but I was beginning to feel sick to my stomach…

Social justice means nothing at these schools with athletic (white, non-URM) preferences so ingrained for 30% of a freshman class. And certainly not helping “diversity” when the majority of white kids on campus are athletes (Swarthmore is only 32% domestic white).
Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 11:51     Subject: Re:Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
I tell my kids life is like a game of chutes and ladders. You go up, sometimes really high, and go down, sometimes really far. Then you go back up and down again. Others may get there before you, but eventually you get to the finish line. The end.
Anonymous
Post 07/26/2024 11:34     Subject: Do I just need to go off social media for a year??
One of the moments during which I lost a ton of respect for my parents was when they insulted my best friend for getting into Yale, a school I was rejected from after applying early. I recommend getting off the internet so that you can avoid doing the same.