Travel sports are so dumb, drop it

NP, would anyone be willing to share the name of their stable summer community location? In the same (fortunate) situation as OP. My older kid is very extroverted and would need a community of same-age friends to return to. Or maybe a great summer camp. Looking at Maine primarily. Thanks!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We did this growing up and still do for the month of August.
I would be sure to have someone check on your house periodically. We have cats so we have a cat sitter come by everyday. It’s peace of mind to know someone is at your house to check on packages or plants or leaks.
If you use a cleaning lady, you might want to have her come at least once a month. We didn’t have ours come last August (though we paid her) until just before we came home. She was not pleased by how gross our house had gotten in just those 3 1/2 weeks. Not just the cats but spiders making new homes, dust, mold, etc.
If your kid plays a fall sport, it’s a pain. We’ve had to come back for a few days for tryouts every year then plead to miss the first week of practice.
Otherwise, enjoy!

Great point about a housekeeper! Don't forget landscaper too.

I feel sorry for the cat being alone so long, why not take a cat to your summer home that you own. Doesn't travel well? Even hotels allow pets these days.

OP here. We plan on taking our cat with us!

We left for the summer starting when I was 11 and it was so effing boring. The only good thing was we had cable at the cabin because that was the only way we could get TV--we didn't have it at home.

My dad would have to go home for meetings and I would always go with him. This was back when you had to pay for long distance so I couldn't even call friends when we were up in the mountains.

It's easier now than it used to be since you can automated and access everything remotely. Security cameras, alarm system, lights, thermostats, irrigation system, pool, etc can all be handled remotely. You can get moisture sensors for under your sinks, etc that are linked to your alarm system. We had a pipe break at our second home once when we were away and it was a mess. It would have been worse, but we had a local friend who would look in on our house every now and then and he noticed. Which makes me second the suggestion that you have someone look in on your house regularly, even if you have all the electronics. If you have a regular housekeeper, have them continue to come. Also, have a local handyman at the second home if you don't want to spend your entire summer doing chores and meeting repair people.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your kids go regularly to the same community, they will have a big group of lifelong summer friends. They will get their first jobs in this summer community. They can even play summer sports or go to camps in this area.

They will actually come to prefer it, if they are acclimated to the community from a young age.

That's what we do. Same community every August. Same people every year. I've been going my whole life and my childhood friends still go and now our kids are friends. My kids couldn't imagine doing anything else.

It's the only way we would even consider a summer home if there is some sort of stable community. I wouldn't do isolated nature places or places that only have transient vacationers (although you could get lucky and find your group there that always rents the same area). Also it won't work if your kids do sports in the summer or have some local camps they go every year to and their friends are there. Seems to me like it's a decision one must make early enough before kids get entrenched in local summer life in their home town with only 1-3 weeks of going on some destination trip. If you only get get away from home for 3 weeks max in the summer it's not worth it IMO to own a summer home especially if there is not much appeal to it during other seasons.

It may work if you need rental income if you don't use it the entire summer, can help pay for many of the expenses. IMO, if one isn't loaded where ownership of a second home is effortless and you don't need rental income and can afford to outsource all maintenance, I'd say no to any location that's not all year round. Hard to find beach places that aren't cold/depressing/deserted in the winter and not possible to rent out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your kids go regularly to the same community, they will have a big group of lifelong summer friends. They will get their first jobs in this summer community. They can even play summer sports or go to camps in this area.

They will actually come to prefer it, if they are acclimated to the community from a young age.

That's what we do. Same community every August. Same people every year. I've been going my whole life and my childhood friends still go and now our kids are friends. My kids couldn't imagine doing anything else.

It's the only way we would even consider a summer home if there is some sort of stable community. I wouldn't do isolated nature places or places that only have transient vacationers (although you could get lucky and find your group there that always rents the same area). Also it won't work if your kids do sports in the summer or have some local camps they go every year to and their friends are there. Seems to me like it's a decision one must make early enough before kids get entrenched in local summer life in their home town with only 1-3 weeks of going on some destination trip. If you only get get away from home for 3 weeks max in the summer it's not worth it IMO to own a summer home especially if there is not much appeal to it during other seasons.

Anonymous wrote:If your kids go regularly to the same community, they will have a big group of lifelong summer friends. They will get their first jobs in this summer community. They can even play summer sports or go to camps in this area.

They will actually come to prefer it, if they are acclimated to the community from a young age.

That's what we do. Same community every August. Same people every year. I've been going my whole life and my childhood friends still go and now our kids are friends. My kids couldn't imagine doing anything else.

No way would they go ...

Not their choice. Not to sound extreme but it *could be* you are failing as a parent.

Anonymous wrote:So through the perfect alignment of many stars, it looks like we may be able to buy a home in our dream town up North. We'd go from June-August so we could maximize our time and escape the heat. Anyone on here just get out of dodge for the whole summer? Pros? Cons? Tips? Advice?

I will add that we do have two kids. One will be at an age where he can work at a camp he's been going to for years so that's great! The other, however, is super sporty and coming into an age where travel sports are going to demand summer time commitment. Not sure if bailing all summer long will help or hinder.

Anyway, any and all insights are appreciated! We're excited about this opportunity but are not from families who could ever afford this kind of luxury so it's all new to us.

No, but I love this idea.

I am not in this situation but can imagine major resistance from my kids to leaving all summer.
I suppose if the location is Nantucket or Martha's Vineyard and there is a whole social scene there it would be more appealing. No way would they go to a house on a lake in Maine with us for the whole summer.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your kids go regularly to the same community, they will have a big group of lifelong summer friends. They will get their first jobs in this summer community. They can even play summer sports or go to camps in this area.

They will actually come to prefer it, if they are acclimated to the community from a young age.

Agree with this. My kids went to sailing camp and eventually taught sailing. There were soccer camps and tennis camps and other programs in our town. They had summer jobs in high school and college. High school was harder with high school sports but it just meant needing to return to DC in early August. One of my DCs did have a couple of summers where they could only be at our home for a week or so, but in the grand scheme of things it all worked out well and now they are in their 20s and still spending a lot of time at the beach house when they are able.

ITA on summer communities, we rented a beach condo for a month 2 years in the row and there was a group of people with kids we met who go there every year, my kids had a great time these years. Some kids went to camps, but for the rest there was a beach/pool. I feel like it's easier to meet friends when at a vacation destination than in a typical UMC suburban neighborhood

Anonymous wrote:My god, the tyranny of children’s sports leaches into every aspect of life. And for what? SMH.

It's optional. Nobody needs travel sports

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We did this growing up and still do for the month of August.
I would be sure to have someone check on your house periodically. We have cats so we have a cat sitter come by everyday. It’s peace of mind to know someone is at your house to check on packages or plants or leaks.
If you use a cleaning lady, you might want to have her come at least once a month. We didn’t have ours come last August (though we paid her) until just before we came home. She was not pleased by how gross our house had gotten in just those 3 1/2 weeks. Not just the cats but spiders making new homes, dust, mold, etc.
If your kid plays a fall sport, it’s a pain. We’ve had to come back for a few days for tryouts every year then plead to miss the first week of practice.
Otherwise, enjoy!

Great point about a housekeeper! Don't forget landscaper too.

I feel sorry for the cat being alone so long, why not take a cat to your summer home that you own. Doesn't travel well? Even hotels allow pets these days.

Anonymous wrote:If your kids go regularly to the same community, they will have a big group of lifelong summer friends. They will get their first jobs in this summer community. They can even play summer sports or go to camps in this area.

They will actually come to prefer it, if they are acclimated to the community from a young age.

Agree with this. My kids went to sailing camp and eventually taught sailing. There were soccer camps and tennis camps and other programs in our town. They had summer jobs in high school and college. High school was harder with high school sports but it just meant needing to return to DC in early August. One of my DCs did have a couple of summers where they could only be at our home for a week or so, but in the grand scheme of things it all worked out well and now they are in their 20s and still spending a lot of time at the beach house when they are able.