Anonymous wrote:My first boyfriend flunked out of college because of video games and another one never wanted to do anything with me except play video games so I got fed up with them. I promised myself that the man I married would have to have no interest in video games!
My friend's husband plays for hours a day and she says "At least he's home and it's stress relief" but I know it drives her crazy that on a beautiful sunny day while she is out enjoying herself with their children he is sitting alone in a dark bedroom.

It's pathetic. It really is.

Anonymous wrote:I dunno, OP. I would never date, let alone marry or have children, a man addicted to video games. I agree it’s not attractive to me. Some people like it though or at least don’t mind it, and that’s great for them. Every pot has a lid or whatever, right?

+1000

Anonymous wrote:I read on here and Reddit all the time about people, mostly men, who spend hours upon hours playing video games like they are 12 year olds. How is this attractive? How do people find time to do this? Especially those who are parents. I sincerely don’t understand. Do your kids just watch you play video games? Do you play with them?

It is attractive because in real life they are nobodies and losers and on the game they are a super powerful wizard or some $h!t. It's fantasy fulfillment. They find the time to do it by short shrifting everything they should be doing as an adult.

Your post is so weird. No one plays video games to be attractive. It’s a form of entertainment. If it’s not for you, that’s fine. That is like saying I don’t understand people that watch movies or read a book. Ok….

Video games are different from the 80s and 90s. They're very sophisticated with storylines and long cutscenes so that some of them are like watching a movie but one that you participate in. You get pretty good value, in terms of entertainment time, for the price, and there's nothing weird about it. It's literally another type of entertainment like watching Netflix or scrolling the internet.

However, from what I have observed with my brother (never married, failure to launch) they have also been made very addictive in a way I would compare to junk food, meaning things have been added very deliberately to hook you beyond moderation.

It used to be that guys like my brother were so good that they could "beat" the game the first weekend it came out, so they started adding "trophies," extra bonus content, special side missions, and other Easter eggs so players could obsess over "100% completion." Then the online component was added where you could not get 100% completion without downloading/purchasing additional material.

Then multiplayer online was added and that's where it becomes super addictive because you have to be online to play with the group, often communicating on platforms like Discord. You're considered to be letting the group down if you're not online with them for various activities to get to a higher level in the game, and it's something that, AFAIK is open universe and there is no beating it, it just goes on forever. I might not have it all exactly right, but that's the gist.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I read on here and Reddit all the time about people, mostly men, who spend hours upon hours playing video games like they are 12 year olds. How is this attractive? How do people find time to do this? Especially those who are parents. I sincerely don’t understand. Do your kids just watch you play video games? Do you play with them?

I don’t understand people that are on Reddit all the time.

Agree. OP, how much time do you spend on Reddit? Does this come at the expense of family time?

What about men who spend hours and hours watching sports…Thursday and Monday night football plus all of the Sunday NFL games, NBA playoffs and March Madness, Stanley cup, golf or worse…162 2+ hours games of baseball plus a few extra weeks of playoffs and the World Series…does passively watching sports on TV rank higher than active gaming with friends?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op - I never had any video gaming systems growing up so I guess my opinion is skewed.

I think more my disdain is for people who are addicted to the detriment of other things. Like taking care of their kids, doing family outings, sleeping late in the mornings because they were up till 3am gaming. Obviously this is not the norm.

But couldn’t the same be said about anything — addicted to fantasy football, going out binge drinking with friends, etc.

It’s all lame if it’s significantly taking away from your family time.

But I don’t see how it’s really different than me liking to get in the bath tub with a good book a couple nights per week once the kids are in bed. And I’m not a huge gamer, but we have a VR system that is fun to toy around with and sometimes I play Wii or Mario Kart with my kids (we do plenty of other stuff too).

Same. Not everything has to be a productive family activity at all times. I like reading and watching Netflix alone in bed. Idk if some other adult prefers video games to Netflix.

I told DH if he plays video games he has to play a warrior or similar melee class, not some effeminate class like archer or mage. He needs to be a man, not a manlet.

Anonymous wrote:Op - I never had any video gaming systems growing up so I guess my opinion is skewed.

I think more my disdain is for people who are addicted to the detriment of other things. Like taking care of their kids, doing family outings, sleeping late in the mornings because they were up till 3am gaming. Obviously this is not the norm.

But couldn’t the same be said about anything — addicted to fantasy football, going out binge drinking with friends, etc.

It’s all lame if it’s significantly taking away from your family time.

But I don’t see how it’s really different than me liking to get in the bath tub with a good book a couple nights per week once the kids are in bed. And I’m not a huge gamer, but we have a VR system that is fun to toy around with and sometimes I play Wii or Mario Kart with my kids (we do plenty of other stuff too).

Anonymous wrote:My first boyfriend flunked out of college because of video games and another one never wanted to do anything with me except play video games so I got fed up with them. I promised myself that the man I married would have to have no interest in video games!
My friend's husband plays for hours a day and she says "At least he's home and it's stress relief" but I know it drives her crazy that on a beautiful sunny day while she is out enjoying herself with their children he is sitting alone in a dark bedroom.

I have friends whose reality this is every single weekend (both days) September-February during football season. Again, I find it strange that video games are what is being singled out here.

Anonymous wrote:My first boyfriend flunked out of college because of video games and another one never wanted to do anything with me except play video games so I got fed up with them. I promised myself that the man I married would have to have no interest in video games!
My friend's husband plays for hours a day and she says "At least he's home and it's stress relief" but I know it drives her crazy that on a beautiful sunny day while she is out enjoying herself with their children he is sitting alone in a dark bedroom.

This is my thought too. I think it’s a sore subject for wives because who wants a husband who plays video games? No one. But if they do…sigh…you have no choice to go along with it.

Anonymous wrote:I read on here and Reddit all the time about people, mostly men, who spend hours upon hours playing video games like they are 12 year olds. How is this attractive? How do people find time to do this? Especially those who are parents. I sincerely don’t understand. Do your kids just watch you play video games? Do you play with them?

I don’t understand people that are on Reddit all the time.

My first boyfriend flunked out of college because of video games and another one never wanted to do anything with me except play video games so I got fed up with them. I promised myself that the man I married would have to have no interest in video games!
My friend's husband plays for hours a day and she says "At least he's home and it's stress relief" but I know it drives her crazy that on a beautiful sunny day while she is out enjoying herself with their children he is sitting alone in a dark bedroom.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand either. I could never even date a man who played video games. To me, it represents sloth, and it’s terribly addictive.

People will rationalize it any way they can. At least with phone addition, people admit it’s horrible. With video games? No. They will defend it to the day they die.

NP. I’ll continue to not consider the opinion of people who say things like “phone addition”.

A typo does not erase a valid point 😉