Anonymous wrote:I agree that whatever you make really well would be such a nice gesture!
When I was going through hard times, I had so many friends who said "Let me know if you need anything!" Some friends came through and others did not...
One friend's DH is a chef. I was like, Oh the kids love that penne vodka DH makes, maybe one day he could make some, just for the kids, for dinner. She was like, Oh he's not feeling well- yes we'll do it, but give me a few days, she hemmed and hawed.... That's fine, but I felt like an idiot for asking.
Another time I was supposed to be in charge of Door Decorating because I am the class parent. In the midst of my dad suddenly dying and my cancer diagnosis, I asked a friend if she could be in the charge of collecting donations and help with the decor. She was like, Oh I'll see, more hemming and hawing! .... eventually she collected the money and we both did the decorating.
But again, I felt dumb taking people up on their offers of help, and yeah a little angry that during a hard time they could say anything to me other than, Yes of course whatever you need.
Just go in there and help. I vote for overstepping. (I'm a single mom so maybe it's different if a spouse is there managning everything)
Be there.
Agree with this. I know I will sound ungrateful, but many people use the words, “let me know how I can help,” and I believe they mean them, but when you actually do ask for help, they hem and haw because they are busy with their own life and needs. Another vote for just stepping in and doing when you really want to help.