Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Since the pandemic, people have very little left over. They are overwhelmed and barely have time to get through things for themselves and immediate loved ones.
Yes, it is ok to be sad to realize certain friends or family members don't show up when you need them to. A lot of that has happened lately.
Take this as a moment to feel sad but also develop more relationships with those who have your back, and make sure to be there for them as well. I use it as an opportunity to find more people who have the capacity for others and keep those close who are always there when I need them.
i wondered about the pandemic factor as well. but after few more years that can't be an excuse anymore right?
I think the first 4/5 months of the pandemic caused a permanent shift in some people and relationships. It was a trigger even that made some people change how they interact with others, and no amount of time will lead them to go back to how they were before. They have moved on from the pandemic but they will not "return to normal" -- this is their normal.
My sister cut her parents and siblings out of her life during the pandemic, and my mom kept waiting for her to come back around but it will not happen. She's gone.
Meanwhile, those early days of the pandemic solidified my friendships with a small number of people in a way that going through something very stressful and traumatic can.
These are permanent shifts.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry you're sad about your aunt's message. I get it. That said, you're the one who moved away. Why must your aunt and uncle alter their vacation to suit your timeline?
They don't have to. It does tell me something about how they feel, as in one more day out of a month-vacation is more important to them than seeing us and especially my kids they see once a year tops. If it were a trip by plane, like firm booked hotel/flight plans, it'd be totally different for me because obviously their schedule doesn't revolve around ours and what's booked is booked. In this case it'd be very easy to just drive home a day early.
Anonymous wrote:You're the adult now. It's your turn to taken are of your beloved aunt. Or become a beloved aunt.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Since the pandemic, people have very little left over. They are overwhelmed and barely have time to get through things for themselves and immediate loved ones.
Yes, it is ok to be sad to realize certain friends or family members don't show up when you need them to. A lot of that has happened lately.
Take this as a moment to feel sad but also develop more relationships with those who have your back, and make sure to be there for them as well. I use it as an opportunity to find more people who have the capacity for others and keep those close who are always there when I need them.
i wondered about the pandemic factor as well. but after few more years that can't be an excuse anymore right?
I think the first 4/5 months of the pandemic caused a permanent shift in some people and relationships. It was a trigger even that made some people change how they interact with others, and no amount of time will lead them to go back to how they were before. They have moved on from the pandemic but they will not "return to normal" -- this is their normal.
My sister cut her parents and siblings out of her life during the pandemic, and my mom kept waiting for her to come back around but it will not happen. She's gone.
Meanwhile, those early days of the pandemic solidified my friendships with a small number of people in a way that going through something very stressful and traumatic can.
These are permanent shifts.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Since the pandemic, people have very little left over. They are overwhelmed and barely have time to get through things for themselves and immediate loved ones.
Yes, it is ok to be sad to realize certain friends or family members don't show up when you need them to. A lot of that has happened lately.
Take this as a moment to feel sad but also develop more relationships with those who have your back, and make sure to be there for them as well. I use it as an opportunity to find more people who have the capacity for others and keep those close who are always there when I need them.
i wondered about the pandemic factor as well. but after few more years that can't be an excuse anymore right?
Anonymous wrote:We’re born alone and we die alone.
Anonymous wrote:OP here and I wouldn't expect most family members to even care about me being in town, but to me my aunt and uncle were on the level of my grandparents I adored and who passed away long ago. I saw them as part of my inner circle of "people who truly, really care forever". So that's why it hurts. It's like the circle is getting smaller. And to people who say they shouldn't drop everything, I 100% understand that, but this is literally a very small trip change, leaving one day early from a long trip. It's something I'd do if I cared about someone.
Anonymous wrote:I have no one op so I get it. Not one person cares about me. It's such a horrible feeling.
Anonymous wrote:I feel the same. I really only care about my immediate family and sister.
Anonymous wrote:Since the pandemic, people have very little left over. They are overwhelmed and barely have time to get through things for themselves and immediate loved ones.
Yes, it is ok to be sad to realize certain friends or family members don't show up when you need them to. A lot of that has happened lately.
Take this as a moment to feel sad but also develop more relationships with those who have your back, and make sure to be there for them as well. I use it as an opportunity to find more people who have the capacity for others and keep those close who are always there when I need them.