Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have been arguing recently over my self-care spending for cosmetic treatments. My husband thinks I spend too much money on Botox, fillers, and laser treatments, but I feel that I am spending a reasonable amount relative to our income. I spend 12k-15k a year on preventive anti-aging skincare treatments and we make around 250k-300k a year. After he started criticizing me for this spending, I pretended to cut back on it, but I am still getting these treatments without telling him. I feel that he is being too controlling and manipulative because I do not spend much money on anything else and this is a relatively small amount of our income.

I'm having a hard time believing that someone so obsessed with her looks that she spends 12-15k a year on skincare is not spending much on anything else. Really? Clothing? Nails? Hair? You're really just doing your skin and nothing else?

I do my own nails, get a few haircuts a year. Probably spend a couple thousand a year on clothing.

Anonymous wrote:We have been arguing recently over my self-care spending for cosmetic treatments. My husband thinks I spend too much money on Botox, fillers, and laser treatments, but I feel that I am spending a reasonable amount relative to our income. I spend 12k-15k a year on preventive anti-aging skincare treatments and we make around 250k-300k a year. After he started criticizing me for this spending, I pretended to cut back on it, but I am still getting these treatments without telling him. I feel that he is being too controlling and manipulative because I do not spend much money on anything else and this is a relatively small amount of our income.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That’s about 10% of your take-home income after taxes and a reasonable level of retirement savings. That seems high to me but it really depends on the rest of your budget. Do you guys have a budget?

We don't really budget per se, but we are saving a decent amount.
We are maxing our HSA's (8,400 each year) and contributing 13k annually to 401k's (20k including employer matching)
Our monthly take home pay is around 13k and we spend
4,000 on mortgage+utilities
1,300 on food
950 on misc expenses
500 on cars (gas, car taxes, maintenance, car insurance)
450 on travel and entertainment

We also max out our Roth IRA's (14k a year) and we own three rental properties (positive cash flow is small so not including)

Ok, I ran your numbers. Based on your Roth contribution amount, you are under 50

Gross income $300k
Fed + State Tax (25%) $75,000
HSA 8,300 (you can't have two of these--that's the family limit)
401(k) $13,000
Roth IRA $13,000
Mortgage $48,000
Groceries $15,600
Misc (utilities, household) $11,400
Cars $6,000
Travel/Entertainment $5,400
Beauty $15,000

This leaves $88,300 unaccounted for.

Thoughts:

1. Your savings rate is on the low side. Including your HSA which I suspect you are also spending from since you didn't list medical expenses, you are only saving 11-12% of your gross income. This is under the recommended 15%.
2. You show no child expenses. Either you have not had kids yet, don't plan to, or have them and they are very young. If you anticipate raising kids, plan on spending a couple thousand a month on increased costs.
3. You did not list any sinking funds (car, home maintenance) except for travel/entertainment. When these big expenses arise for a new car, HVAC, roof, etc., where will this money come from? You should be saving 10% of your income for these kinds of things.
4. You show no pets. Hopefully this means you don't have any pets.
5. You show no debt payments other than the mortgage. Hopefully this means you don't have any other debt.
6. What about gifts, life insurance, clothes, mobile phone?

If your numbers are correct, your fixed costs are low and you do have some flexibility. If you want to spend $1,250 a month on beauty, you probably can, but I recommend you make some other changes.

1. Increase 401k so you are both contributing $13,000, going to $26,000 between the two of you.
2. Begin saving $2,500-$3,000 a month into a sinking fund for car repair/replacement and home maintenance.

Then actually track your spending and see if that's where you want your money to go. You and your spouse need to agree on a long-term vision then not get upset over the details.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That’s about 10% of your take-home income after taxes and a reasonable level of retirement savings. That seems high to me but it really depends on the rest of your budget. Do you guys have a budget?

We don't really budget per se, but we are saving a decent amount.
We are maxing our HSA's (8,400 each year) and contributing 13k annually to 401k's (20k including employer matching)
Our monthly take home pay is around 13k and we spend
4,000 on mortgage+utilities
1,300 on food
950 on misc expenses
500 on cars (gas, car taxes, maintenance, car insurance)
450 on travel and entertainment

We also max out our Roth IRA's (14k a year) and we own three rental properties (positive cash flow is small so not including)

Anonymous wrote:where is your emergency fund OP? your botoxed forehead is not going to save you if you have major medical expenses--but at least you'll look plastic right?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have been arguing recently over my self-care spending for cosmetic treatments. My husband thinks I spend too much money on Botox, fillers, and laser treatments, but I feel that I am spending a reasonable amount relative to our income. I spend 12k-15k a year on preventive anti-aging skincare treatments and we make around 250k-300k a year. After he started criticizing me for this spending, I pretended to cut back on it, but I am still getting these treatments without telling him. I feel that he is being too controlling and manipulative because I do not spend much money on anything else and this is a relatively small amount of our income.

I'm having a hard time believing that someone so obsessed with her looks that she spends 12-15k a year on skincare is not spending much on anything else. Really? Clothing? Nails? Hair? You're really just doing your skin and nothing else?

I do my own nails, get a few haircuts a year. Probably spend a couple thousand a year on clothing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have been arguing recently over my self-care spending for cosmetic treatments. My husband thinks I spend too much money on Botox, fillers, and laser treatments, but I feel that I am spending a reasonable amount relative to our income. I spend 12k-15k a year on preventive anti-aging skincare treatments and we make around 250k-300k a year. After he started criticizing me for this spending, I pretended to cut back on it, but I am still getting these treatments without telling him. I feel that he is being too controlling and manipulative because I do not spend much money on anything else and this is a relatively small amount of our income.

I'm having a hard time believing that someone so obsessed with her looks that she spends 12-15k a year on skincare is not spending much on anything else. Really? Clothing? Nails? Hair? You're really just doing your skin and nothing else?

Anonymous wrote:We have been arguing recently over my self-care spending for cosmetic treatments. My husband thinks I spend too much money on Botox, fillers, and laser treatments, but I feel that I am spending a reasonable amount relative to our income. I spend 12k-15k a year on preventive anti-aging skincare treatments and we make around 250k-300k a year. After he started criticizing me for this spending, I pretended to cut back on it, but I am still getting these treatments without telling him. I feel that he is being too controlling and manipulative because I do not spend much money on anything else and this is a relatively small amount of our income.

Anonymous wrote:Wow. The most important thing to do is actually use sunscreen. Even using expensive sunscreen you are not going to spend 15,000 a year on it. That is insane money. How bad is your skin???

Anonymous wrote:We have been arguing recently over my self-care spending for cosmetic treatments. My husband thinks I spend too much money on Botox, fillers, and laser treatments, but I feel that I am spending a reasonable amount relative to our income. I spend 12k-15k a year on preventive anti-aging skincare treatments and we make around 250k-300k a year. After he started criticizing me for this spending, I pretended to cut back on it, but I am still getting these treatments without telling him. I feel that he is being too controlling and manipulative because I do not spend much money on anything else and this is a relatively small amount of our income.