Anonymous wrote:OP is a troll.

I am not! I can’t prove it but I am not.

OP is a troll.

Anonymous wrote:OP, you're making this weird
You can have a best friend that you want to spend lots and lots of time with.

If you're gay, you're gay. That's different.

Seems simple enough.

Anonymous wrote:OP here and I am a very real person.

I am enjoying this discussion.

And to answer PP, I do enjoy drama, the "chase", chemistry, all that stuff.

Sex in general just isnt on my mind at all, unfortunately. I don't fantasize about her or my husband.

But I feel much more drawn to her than my husband.

Yes, that’s it. You want to live in a fantasy of possibly having sex with your friend.

I mean this doesn’t actually sound like a great friendship unless she’s down for this Victorian drama as well. This sounds like you having a made up affair in your head.

Man here, I’m the opposite. I’m a very serious golfer but the idea of going to Scotland for a week or so with 3 guys has no appeal to me. Too much golf, drinking and bsing. I’d rather do it with my wife and another couple and play golf every other day and enjoy ourselves. Maybe this is why we’ve been happily married for 34 years.

OP here and I am a very real person.

I am enjoying this discussion.

And to answer PP, I do enjoy drama, the "chase", chemistry, all that stuff.

Sex in general just isnt on my mind at all, unfortunately. I don't fantasize about her or my husband.

But I feel much more drawn to her than my husband.

What are the odds that some dude wrote this as some jerk off fantasy.

Anonymous wrote:I’m a married woman.

In the last year I’ve made friends with this wonderful friend (woman) and I find myself so attracted to her. To her energy and vibe and beauty…

I can’t say I want to have sex with her at all but that I’m just so attracted to her energy.
I want to be with her all the time… way more than I want to be with my husband. she’s fun, we can talk for hours, and she makes me laugh harder than anyone I’ve known.

Is this just life as a married woman with girl friends???

Sorry you want to cuddle with her and are 'attracted to' her but sex is...no beuno? Oh god are you one of those people that likes to live in that tension of "what if"?

Sounds like more than even a very good friend. Or you sound like you like living in the land of fuzzy boundaries and enjoy drama.

Have a 3 way. Win-win-win

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a married woman.

In the last year I’ve made friends with this wonderful friend (woman) and I find myself so attracted to her. To her energy and vibe and beauty…

I can’t say I want to have sex with her at all but that I’m just so attracted to her energy.
I want to be with her all the time… way more than I want to be with my husband. she’s fun, we can talk for hours, and she makes me laugh harder than anyone I’ve known.

Is this just life as a married woman with girl friends???

But have tried to have sex with her? She might be the one for you

No, and I don’t want to? Cuddle maybe but not sex.

Anonymous wrote:I’m a married woman.

In the last year I’ve made friends with this wonderful friend (woman) and I find myself so attracted to her. To her energy and vibe and beauty…

I can’t say I want to have sex with her at all but that I’m just so attracted to her energy.
I want to be with her all the time… way more than I want to be with my husband. she’s fun, we can talk for hours, and she makes me laugh harder than anyone I’ve known.

Is this just life as a married woman with girl friends???

But have tried to have sex with her? She might be the one for you

OP, this doesn’t mean you are gay or bi.

It is 100% in modern invention that the only person we’re supposed to have intense feelings for is a romantic partner.

I listen to a very good podcast recently about how friendships were central part of human life and valued just as much as a romantic partner until the modern age. Homophobia and other factors have had a lot to do with why we are afraid to pursue close friendships with members of the same sex. I wish I could remember the podcast to share here, but I think it’s worth googling.

I’m a gay woman who was once married to a man. Part of my figuring it out had to do with a close friendship. But my situation was different in the way that I did want to have sex with my friend. She did not, as she is straight. But we are still friends and I have since divorced and now in relationship with a woman.

Maybe it's time for a little swim in the lady pond, OP.

Anonymous wrote:It’s a friendship. I don’t know how we got to the point where we have to think about every relationship in a sexual way.

+1!!!

I think my best friend is beautiful, more smart and interesting than my husband, but I DO NOT want her in a sexual way!!!

As a lesbian, um, have you considered the possibility that you might be bi?

I have plenty of female friends and with 99.9% of them, there is zero attraction.