Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so mom sure they really believe that you need to be saved
From a life of eternal dammation and that their religion will bring you not only salvation but true happiness. It
Comes from a place of love. And I don’t think they can likely help themselves

Honestly this is what I would think too.
From their point of view—they are “risking their relationship with you” because it is worth the risk of it means that you will be saved through knowing Jesus Christ as your savior. Even if YOU don’t believe this, it’s important for you to understand WHY the only kind and compassionate choice *from their perspective* is to NOT leave it alone.
Sure—from a worldly view, they absolutely should just live and let live. And to a non-believer that makes perfect sense bc who cares what religion you are!
But the point is, they DO care because they care about YOU! And to shrug and just let it go means (to them) that they need to just keep their mouths shut while you condemn yourselves and their grandchildren to an eternity of separation from God.

The point of my post is not to persuade you to accept Christ (because I don’t think that a random post on a message board will do that anyway)—-but rather to persuade you to at least consider the purity of their motives and have compassion for their predicament. Rationally, given their worldview, wouldn’t you agree that if they are believers who just “let it go”—-that would make them incredibly heartless and selfish??? Are they supposed to pretend it doesn’t matter to them or that they are indifferent about where you spend eternity? That would make your lives easier and more cordial while you are all together, and I get that….but it wouldn’t make them very loving for them to prioritize pleasantries and not offending you over your eternal salvation. (Again—this assumes that the motivation comes from a sincerely held belief that without Christ, your souls will perish. That’s a lot to ask a parent/grandparent to just shrug off)

Just a thought.

Would you say the same thing about a workplace? Would you continually harass co-workers to find salvation? Or would you realize that it is wildly inappropriate?

Now you have someone actively telling you to stop, but you wont? Because you "care" so much about them, but not what they want or ask?

Would I?
No.
Would I understand if someone else felt convicted to share the Gospel because they earnestly thought they had a higher obligation to fellow man than societal standards of MYOB, and in defiance of workplace policies and laws that prevent this?
Yeah—I could intellectually understand that some people rationalize that the call to be “fishers of men” require placing a higher value on salvation than on observing what is comfortable for others.

Let me be clear. I’m not condoning the In-laws (misguided) choice OR the fictitious hypothetical overzealous co-worker in your scenario. (And in the latter case, the co-worker who defies the workplace policy should and probably does lose his/her job over it.)

What I’m doing is attempting to make a case for compassionate analysis of their perspective. Why would in-laws do this if they know it risks alienating their children and grandchildren??? Likely the answer isn’t just “because they’re obnoxious and selfish!” Likely it’s because something more is driving them to share anyway—despite their children saying “we don’t wanna hear it!!”

That doesn’t have to mean that I think it’s the right thing to do—or that it IS the right thing to do. But if THEY think that it is their responsibility to do this thing in order to save me from peril, I’m going to look at their actions with a bit more compassion than annoyance.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so mom sure they really believe that you need to be saved
From a life of eternal dammation and that their religion will bring you not only salvation but true happiness. It
Comes from a place of love. And I don’t think they can likely help themselves

Honestly this is what I would think too.
From their point of view—they are “risking their relationship with you” because it is worth the risk of it means that you will be saved through knowing Jesus Christ as your savior. Even if YOU don’t believe this, it’s important for you to understand WHY the only kind and compassionate choice *from their perspective* is to NOT leave it alone.
Sure—from a worldly view, they absolutely should just live and let live. And to a non-believer that makes perfect sense bc who cares what religion you are!
But the point is, they DO care because they care about YOU! And to shrug and just let it go means (to them) that they need to just keep their mouths shut while you condemn yourselves and their grandchildren to an eternity of separation from God.

The point of my post is not to persuade you to accept Christ (because I don’t think that a random post on a message board will do that anyway)—-but rather to persuade you to at least consider the purity of their motives and have compassion for their predicament. Rationally, given their worldview, wouldn’t you agree that if they are believers who just “let it go”—-that would make them incredibly heartless and selfish??? Are they supposed to pretend it doesn’t matter to them or that they are indifferent about where you spend eternity? That would make your lives easier and more cordial while you are all together, and I get that….but it wouldn’t make them very loving for them to prioritize pleasantries and not offending you over your eternal salvation. (Again—this assumes that the motivation comes from a sincerely held belief that without Christ, your souls will perish. That’s a lot to ask a parent/grandparent to just shrug off)

Just a thought.

Would you say the same thing about a workplace? Would you continually harass co-workers to find salvation? Or would you realize that it is wildly inappropriate?

Now you have someone actively telling you to stop, but you wont? Because you "care" so much about them, but not what they want or ask?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so mom sure they really believe that you need to be saved
From a life of eternal dammation and that their religion will bring you not only salvation but true happiness. It
Comes from a place of love. And I don’t think they can likely help themselves

Honestly this is what I would think too.
From their point of view—they are “risking their relationship with you” because it is worth the risk of it means that you will be saved through knowing Jesus Christ as your savior. Even if YOU don’t believe this, it’s important for you to understand WHY the only kind and compassionate choice *from their perspective* is to NOT leave it alone.
Sure—from a worldly view, they absolutely should just live and let live. And to a non-believer that makes perfect sense bc who cares what religion you are!
But the point is, they DO care because they care about YOU! And to shrug and just let it go means (to them) that they need to just keep their mouths shut while you condemn yourselves and their grandchildren to an eternity of separation from God.

The point of my post is not to persuade you to accept Christ (because I don’t think that a random post on a message board will do that anyway)—-but rather to persuade you to at least consider the purity of their motives and have compassion for their predicament. Rationally, given their worldview, wouldn’t you agree that if they are believers who just “let it go”—-that would make them incredibly heartless and selfish??? Are they supposed to pretend it doesn’t matter to them or that they are indifferent about where you spend eternity? That would make your lives easier and more cordial while you are all together, and I get that….but it wouldn’t make them very loving for them to prioritize pleasantries and not offending you over your eternal salvation. (Again—this assumes that the motivation comes from a sincerely held belief that without Christ, your souls will perish. That’s a lot to ask a parent/grandparent to just shrug off)

Just a thought.

Np but the bolded is incredibly offensive and heartless (and if I'm being truly honest quite laughable) to hold on to as a sincere belief, but if you must, you should always keep these kinds of dogmatic opinions to yourself and not push it on to others, only to be 'hurt' when rejected.

Just a thought.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so mom sure they really believe that you need to be saved
From a life of eternal dammation and that their religion will bring you not only salvation but true happiness. It
Comes from a place of love. And I don’t think they can likely help themselves

Honestly this is what I would think too.
From their point of view—they are “risking their relationship with you” because it is worth the risk of it means that you will be saved through knowing Jesus Christ as your savior. Even if YOU don’t believe this, it’s important for you to understand WHY the only kind and compassionate choice *from their perspective* is to NOT leave it alone.
Sure—from a worldly view, they absolutely should just live and let live. And to a non-believer that makes perfect sense bc who cares what religion you are!
But the point is, they DO care because they care about YOU! And to shrug and just let it go means (to them) that they need to just keep their mouths shut while you condemn yourselves and their grandchildren to an eternity of separation from God.

The point of my post is not to persuade you to accept Christ (because I don’t think that a random post on a message board will do that anyway)—-but rather to persuade you to at least consider the purity of their motives and have compassion for their predicament. Rationally, given their worldview, wouldn’t you agree that if they are believers who just “let it go”—-that would make them incredibly heartless and selfish??? Are they supposed to pretend it doesn’t matter to them or that they are indifferent about where you spend eternity? That would make your lives easier and more cordial while you are all together, and I get that….but it wouldn’t make them very loving for them to prioritize pleasantries and not offending you over your eternal salvation. (Again—this assumes that the motivation comes from a sincerely held belief that without Christ, your souls will perish. That’s a lot to ask a parent/grandparent to just shrug off)

Just a thought.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so mom sure they really believe that you need to be saved
From a life of eternal dammation and that their religion will bring you not only salvation but true happiness. It
Comes from a place of love. And I don’t think they can likely help themselves

Honestly this is what I would think too.
From their point of view—they are “risking their relationship with you” because it is worth the risk of it means that you will be saved through knowing Jesus Christ as your savior. Even if YOU don’t believe this, it’s important for you to understand WHY the only kind and compassionate choice *from their perspective* is to NOT leave it alone.
Sure—from a worldly view, they absolutely should just live and let live. And to a non-believer that makes perfect sense bc who cares what religion you are!
But the point is, they DO care because they care about YOU! And to shrug and just let it go means (to them) that they need to just keep their mouths shut while you condemn yourselves and their grandchildren to an eternity of separation from God.

The point of my post is not to persuade you to accept Christ (because I don’t think that a random post on a message board will do that anyway)—-but rather to persuade you to at least consider the purity of their motives and have compassion for their predicament. Rationally, given their worldview, wouldn’t you agree that if they are believers who just “let it go”—-that would make them incredibly heartless and selfish??? Are they supposed to pretend it doesn’t matter to them or that they are indifferent about where you spend eternity? That would make your lives easier and more cordial while you are all together, and I get that….but it wouldn’t make them very loving for them to prioritize pleasantries and not offending you over your eternal salvation. (Again—this assumes that the motivation comes from a sincerely held belief that without Christ, your souls will perish. That’s a lot to ask a parent/grandparent to just shrug off)

Just a thought.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so mom sure they really believe that you need to be saved
From a life of eternal dammation and that their religion will bring you not only salvation but true happiness. It
Comes from a place of love. And I don’t think they can likely help themselves

Honestly this is what I would think too.
From their point of view—they are “risking their relationship with you” because it is worth the risk of it means that you will be saved through knowing Jesus Christ as your savior. Even if YOU don’t believe this, it’s important for you to understand WHY the only kind and compassionate choice *from their perspective* is to NOT leave it alone.
Sure—from a worldly view, they absolutely should just live and let live. And to a non-believer that makes perfect sense bc who cares what religion you are!
But the point is, they DO care because they care about YOU! And to shrug and just let it go means (to them) that they need to just keep their mouths shut while you condemn yourselves and their grandchildren to an eternity of separation from God.

The point of my post is not to persuade you to accept Christ (because I don’t think that a random post on a message board will do that anyway)—-but rather to persuade you to at least consider the purity of their motives and have compassion for their predicament. Rationally, given their worldview, wouldn’t you agree that if they are believers who just “let it go”—-that would make them incredibly heartless and selfish??? Are they supposed to pretend it doesn’t matter to them or that they are indifferent about where you spend eternity? That would make your lives easier and more cordial while you are all together, and I get that….but it wouldn’t make them very loving for them to prioritize pleasantries and not offending you over your eternal salvation. (Again—this assumes that the motivation comes from a sincerely held belief that without Christ, your souls will perish. That’s a lot to ask a parent/grandparent to just shrug off)

Just a thought.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so mom sure they really believe that you need to be saved
From a life of eternal dammation and that their religion will bring you not only salvation but true happiness. It
Comes from a place of love. And I don’t think they can likely help themselves

Honestly this is what I would think too.
From their point of view—they are “risking their relationship with you” because it is worth the risk of it means that you will be saved through knowing Jesus Christ as your savior. Even if YOU don’t believe this, it’s important for you to understand WHY the only kind and compassionate choice *from their perspective* is to NOT leave it alone.
Sure—from a worldly view, they absolutely should just live and let live. And to a non-believer that makes perfect sense bc who cares what religion you are!
But the point is, they DO care because they care about YOU! And to shrug and just let it go means (to them) that they need to just keep their mouths shut while you condemn yourselves and their grandchildren to an eternity of separation from God.

The point of my post is not to persuade you to accept Christ (because I don’t think that a random post on a message board will do that anyway)—-but rather to persuade you to at least consider the purity of their motives and have compassion for their predicament. Rationally, given their worldview, wouldn’t you agree that if they are believers who just “let it go”—-that would make them incredibly heartless and selfish??? Are they supposed to pretend it doesn’t matter to them or that they are indifferent about where you spend eternity? That would make your lives easier and more cordial while you are all together, and I get that….but it wouldn’t make them very loving for them to prioritize pleasantries and not offending you over your eternal salvation. (Again—this assumes that the motivation comes from a sincerely held belief that without Christ, your souls will perish. That’s a lot to ask a parent/grandparent to just shrug off)

Just a thought.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so mom sure they really believe that you need to be saved
From a life of eternal dammation and that their religion will bring you not only salvation but true happiness. It
Comes from a place of love. And I don’t think they can likely help themselves

Honestly this is what I would think too.
From their point of view—they are “risking their relationship with you” because it is worth the risk of it means that you will be saved through knowing Jesus Christ as your savior. Even if YOU don’t believe this, it’s important for you to understand WHY the only kind and compassionate choice *from their perspective* is to NOT leave it alone.
Sure—from a worldly view, they absolutely should just live and let live. And to a non-believer that makes perfect sense bc who cares what religion you are!
But the point is, they DO care because they care about YOU! And to shrug and just let it go means (to them) that they need to just keep their mouths shut while you condemn yourselves and their grandchildren to an eternity of separation from God.

The point of my post is not to persuade you to accept Christ (because I don’t think that a random post on a message board will do that anyway)—-but rather to persuade you to at least consider the purity of their motives and have compassion for their predicament. Rationally, given their worldview, wouldn’t you agree that if they are believers who just “let it go”—-that would make them incredibly heartless and selfish??? Are they supposed to pretend it doesn’t matter to them or that they are indifferent about where you spend eternity? That would make your lives easier and more cordial while you are all together, and I get that….but it wouldn’t make them very loving for them to prioritize pleasantries and not offending you over your eternal salvation. (Again—this assumes that the motivation comes from a sincerely held belief that without Christ, your souls will perish. That’s a lot to ask a parent/grandparent to just shrug off)

Just a thought.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so mom sure they really believe that you need to be saved
From a life of eternal dammation and that their religion will bring you not only salvation but true happiness. It
Comes from a place of love. And I don’t think they can likely help themselves

Anonymous wrote:I second the suggestion that your DH be direct with them. Politely declining hasn't gotten through to them and/or their church encourages members to persevere in their efforts to find the 'light of Jesus'. Believe you me, I know what that feels like. Your DH needs to clearly and unambiguously tell them that you will not be discussing religion and that you will not accept religiously themed gifts. People are often uncomfortable with such directness but you've already tried the soft method. That is not an effective technique with them.

Once they've, unambiguously, been told what your boundary is, you should expect them to test it. You and your DH need to be on the same page on the response to that. If you aren't going to be firm about the boundary, they will continue to push their religion on you. There will be excuses like, 'oh, it's just this little thing', 'oh, this isn't a big deal', 'oh, you're making too much out of this', 'oh, this really isn't religious', 'you mean you don't want to know what's going on in our lives?', etc. Holding firm is not the same as being rude. Good luck.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What are your beliefs? You make it sound like ILs are one religion and you're another. I always find these types of posts somewhat suspect, a troll starting a topic out of boredom due to the scarcity of details. Is your hypothetical DH really going to completely cut off his parents for proselytizing? This is pretty extreme and not to mention childish and selfish.

I would tell your hypothetical DH to suck it up, smile politely, and just change the topic.

I thought OP made it pretty clear. ILs pushing their religion on our family DH and I have always been respectful although we don't share the same beliefs.

OP I think your dh should be upfront. Tell them he is on the verge of cutting them off if they do not stop. After that follow his lead.

No, it's not clear. "Their religion" = what does that mean? Are they Southern Baptist and their son married a Jewish woman and is raising the kids Jewish? Or is it the ILs are devoutly Christian and the son and DIL are culturally Christian meaning they celebrate Christmas but otherwise don't go to church, meaning they have no real belief.

Why would you cut off your parents because they are religious and want to share their faith? Cutting off is pretty serious. What does it even mean? We are no longer talking? That's pretty drastic. I have different political views from my parents but I don't "cut" them off for it.

I find it fascinating that for some people on here the default response is to cut off family members even just for differing opinions. People who say that always strike me as the ones with the real problems, not the family members they're cutting off.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:ILs are extremely religious. Every gift for the kids is religious based. DH and I have always been respectful although we don't share the same beliefs. They have started pushing more with texts, emails, books, videos and pulling DH or I aside that we need to find religion. DH is ready to completely cut them off since they can't seem to respect our beliefs. Is there any way to talk to someone like this? No matter how often we say no thank you, they keep pushing.

That’s weird. Especially in this day and age. But sounds like nothing terrible going on or ordering you around.

They should stop the emails and texts and multimedia stuff. But if you want to go to the church dinner night or temple holiday, are you really so against that community in any way, shape or form?

Some places of worship have weekly school hour, sports teams, k-8 schools, and fun holy days.