Anonymous
04/08/2024 14:44
Subject: Why are relationships so hard?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's hard if you put in effort each day. It's like keeping your room clean - if you tidy for 5 minutes in the morning and 5 minutes before bed, your bedroom never gets too messy. But if you don't invest that time and effort, it becomes a HUGE, overwhelming mess.
Can you talk a little about what that daily effort looks like to you?
It’s a lot of things. Last week he had a big client meeting and that morning as he walked out the door I blasted the theme song from Rocky for him. I try to compliment often and if I have to criticize do it privately and be succinct in saying what I want him to change . I apologize whenever I should. We normally do our own laundry but if he’s super busy I’ll do it for him. I got him flowers recently. The little things add up so much. I compliment him often.
None of these things seem to require much effort, but you shouldn’t feel like you have to do all of this. If you care about someone, you should want to do nice things for them, not feel like it’s a burden.
Where did PP say it was a burden to do these things? Or that she feels like she has to do all that?
Anonymous
04/08/2024 14:34
Subject: Why are relationships so hard?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's hard if you put in effort each day. It's like keeping your room clean - if you tidy for 5 minutes in the morning and 5 minutes before bed, your bedroom never gets too messy. But if you don't invest that time and effort, it becomes a HUGE, overwhelming mess.
Can you talk a little about what that daily effort looks like to you?
It’s a lot of things. Last week he had a big client meeting and that morning as he walked out the door I blasted the theme song from Rocky for him. I try to compliment often and if I have to criticize do it privately and be succinct in saying what I want him to change . I apologize whenever I should. We normally do our own laundry but if he’s super busy I’ll do it for him. I got him flowers recently. The little things add up so much. I compliment him often.
None of these things seem to require much effort, but you shouldn’t feel like you have to do all of this. If you care about someone, you should want to do nice things for them, not feel like it’s a burden.
Anonymous
04/08/2024 14:27
Subject: Why are relationships so hard?
Anonymous wrote:“Hoeflation”: The dramatic increase in cost for men today to maintain a relationship with a woman while the quality of women continues to go down. That is to say, it is an increase in female expectations vs what they bring to the table in a relationship.
Why do you misogynistic a$$ wipes keep trolling the boards? Get a life.
Anonymous
04/08/2024 14:24
Subject: Why are relationships so hard?
“Hoeflation”: The dramatic increase in cost for men today to maintain a relationship with a woman while the quality of women continues to go down. That is to say, it is an increase in female expectations vs what they bring to the table in a relationship.
Anonymous
04/08/2024 14:20
Subject: Why are relationships so hard?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's hard if you put in effort each day. It's like keeping your room clean - if you tidy for 5 minutes in the morning and 5 minutes before bed, your bedroom never gets too messy. But if you don't invest that time and effort, it becomes a HUGE, overwhelming mess.
Can you talk a little about what that daily effort looks like to you?
It’s a lot of things. Last week he had a big client meeting and that morning as he walked out the door I blasted the theme song from Rocky for him. I try to compliment often and if I have to criticize do it privately and be succinct in saying what I want him to change . I apologize whenever I should. We normally do our own laundry but if he’s super busy I’ll do it for him. I got him flowers recently. The little things add up so much. I compliment him often.
Thank you. Can you share a little About major compromises you’ve had to make in order for the marriage to work? Any personality traits you overlook?
Um, I had to get used to how close he is with his parents. It's not abnormal - I was just abnormally NOT close with mine. So we had to compromise on time spent with them, and have some Big Talks about things he tells them and things about me/us he doesn't. We actually went to therapy early in our marriage to work on our communication - he would just avoid me if he was angry or felt I was angry at him and I got passive-aggressive. Learning how to argue constructively and communicate directly blew me away and changed our relationship for the better. I thought going to therapy meant our marriage was doomed and broken - I am so glad he insisted on it.
Anonymous
04/08/2024 12:39
Subject: Why are relationships so hard?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Women are very moody like hormones, menopause, gain weight
You do know that, at certain points in life, that is due to biology. LITERAL body changes they can't control. And many doctors are not adept at identifying and counseling women through it.
Such as a first-world problem, in the absence of true hardships, the small ones become the focus and are promoted to being a big deal. Many people need a reality check and to see how women from foreign countries are eager to come to the US to find an American husband. Other cultures are very hard on women, while the US is the complete opposite. This has led to a situation where some believe American women have become overbearing, not worth the effort, and prone to overreacting over minor things. Staying in shape and managing hormone changes may not be difficult, but in the absence of real hardships, there's a tendency to make everything about oneself.
This is a bunch of mumbo jumbo. Don't follow what you're getting at here.