When my kids were your kids' ages we had a full-time nanny who did all kid laundry and kept the kids' rooms and playroom tidy and organized.

My kids are older and we no longer have a nanny. We now have a "housekeeper" for 10 hours a week. In those 10 hours she does all kid laundry, drives my kids to some activities, cooks us 1-2 nights' dinners, and does random tasks as they come up like rotating kids' closets seasonally. She is very expensive, but worth every single penny!!!! (We also have a cleaning lady who comes every two weeks and she does our linens and every other week's worth of towels.)

I personally like having the help with the chores rather than babysitting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m going to be jumped on but I don’t understand this. It’s hard when both parents work out of the home, no doubt, but working from home even a couple days a week makes staying on top of these things very manageable. I say this having done all - woh, wfm, hybrid and SAHM. Make a schedule for daily tasks and stick to it. Buy more clothes for your kids so you’re not doing laundry more than a couple times a week. My oldest is 3 and my kids pick up their own toys before bath.

If you want to hire out I do think the best of all worlds is wfm plus full or part time nanny - nanny does all the kids stuff (laundry, changing sheets, tidying bedrooms, play room, etc).

Ummm, that's housekeeping, that's not nannying.

Ummmm here’s an educated guess: you don’t even know what a w2 looks like.

We have a house cleaning service that comes every other week to clean. They don't do anything other than clean. We recently found a woman who comes once weekly and does laundry, light housekeeping, and whatever other odd tasks I ask (e.g., sanitizing the humidifier, organizing a closet, cleaning up playroom, etc.). It's some of the best money we spend. Prior to this, I spent my life with chores hanging over my head every day because I could never fully catch up. I'm still doing the day-to-day tidying, and I still wash all of the laundry, but the never-ending cycle of folding and putting away clothes is complete, the kitchen floors are mopped once per week, and other odd tasks don't have to move from one mental to-do list to another. The woman charges $25/hour solo or $50/hour when she comes with her sister-in-law. We normally use about 5-6 hours of work a week. They are very efficient and to me, this equates to another 5-6 hours I can spend hanging out with my family without the weight of excessive undone chores over my head. You can find people who do this type of work, but you have to search for it because most house cleaners won't.

Anonymous wrote:I’m going to be jumped on but I don’t understand this. It’s hard when both parents work out of the home, no doubt, but working from home even a couple days a week makes staying on top of these things very manageable. I say this having done all - woh, wfm, hybrid and SAHM. Make a schedule for daily tasks and stick to it. Buy more clothes for your kids so you’re not doing laundry more than a couple times a week. My oldest is 3 and my kids pick up their own toys before bath.

If you want to hire out I do think the best of all worlds is wfm plus full or part time nanny - nanny does all the kids stuff (laundry, changing sheets, tidying bedrooms, play room, etc).

Ummm, that's housekeeping, that's not nannying.

I’m going to be jumped on but I don’t understand this. It’s hard when both parents work out of the home, no doubt, but working from home even a couple days a week makes staying on top of these things very manageable. I say this having done all - woh, wfm, hybrid and SAHM. Make a schedule for daily tasks and stick to it. Buy more clothes for your kids so you’re not doing laundry more than a couple times a week. My oldest is 3 and my kids pick up their own toys before bath.

If you want to hire out I do think the best of all worlds is wfm plus full or part time nanny - nanny does all the kids stuff (laundry, changing sheets, tidying bedrooms, play room, etc).

Agree with the above that you have too much stuff OP. It should take no more than 15 minutes per night to tidy up toys. Toss 1 load in the washer each morning, move to dryer when you get home, fold in front of tv right after kids go down.

Do your kids have a solid bedtime routine and early bedtime. I actually find most people who are overwhelmed have kids that take way too long to put to bed and/or go to bed too late. They should be down by 7:30 (or even early) and it should take no more than 30 minutes.

Anonymous wrote:What you’ve noted is bothering you is toys and laundry piles. It really makes a difference to streamline your possessions. Way less toys and have large bins or baskets to throw them into. The four year is perfectly capable of chucking the toys into a basket to clean up. If they won’t, get a trash bag and put left out toys into it. This method will work pretty quickly.
As far as laundry, unless dirty, kids clothes can be worn twice, and pajamas for days. Just change their clothes in the morning so they don’t eat in their pajamas. Capsule wardrobes are all they need. Doing small loads of laundry more frequently is much easier than letting huge loads pile up in my opinion.
SomethingI do in the evenings occasionally after bedtime is set a timer for 10 or 15 minutes and do whatever kitchen prep tasks I can in that timeframe. Example: wash and cut up produce, pack lunches or snacks, get oatmeal soaking for breakfast, set the table for breakfast, etc. Small things that can make mornings feel so much better but I don’t force myself to do it all. It’s amazing what a timer can motivate you to do.

+100
Especially at this age, start early with streamlining toys and clothes. Try to get down to the minimum that you need. It seems counter intuitive, but less clothing is actually easier than having more pile up for huge, long laundry days. Instead have fewer clothes and throw a small load in the washer when you get home or before you leave for work and then put it in the dryer before you go to bed every other day or so. If you have fewer clothes you don't even really have to fold them, you can just put them in the drawer.

Check out Minimal Mom and Dana K White on YouTube for more on this.

I am a single mom (by choice) and I did not bother to sort/fold DD underwear when they were very young. i just threw them in a pretty basket after the dryer. It took 2 seconds to grab them out of the basket. At about 3 we used laundry time as learning time. Great bonding time. Colors to learn. Washing machine knobs were circles. Turn left or right. So, so many opportunities like this. Some of my best memories.

When my kids were younger and I worked outside of the home full-time, I used this laundry service for their clothes: https://thewishywash.com (I was OK managing my own and my husband did his own laundry.) It was awesome -- left bag of dirty clothes on the front porch and it was returned clean and folded.

If laundry is an issue, this is a relatively inexpensive way to move it off your plate.

Be more organized, get weekly cleaners, get baskets for children's stuff so you don't have to fold clothes, arrange toys, just throw in the right basket.

if you are drowning in laundry, do you ever catch up?

if not do a catch up weekend or go to the laundromat to catch up. it is a drag, but worth it to get everything done at once.

if you pick up each day, the house is easy to keep tidy.

you probably have too many toys. most people do. stop getting more toys. get rid of those that are outgrown.

sounds like you could use a cleaner more often. find one that will do some laundry as well.

if you keep up with laundry and cleaning each week, the tasks arent as huge!

I have a friend that uses task rabbit and/or urban sitter to help with stuff, there are plenty of people that to make some extra cash! And you can probably find a couple regulars willing to come in a couple times a week. Task rabbit might be your best bet as there are probably people on there with like organization type skills or meal prep if that would be helpful, but even if you hire a sitter for a date night you could ask them if they want to make some extra cash when the kids go to sleep they could put the dishes away and tidy the toys.
I'd feel weird about other people doing my laundry so I agree with the one load a day poster, which should be doable working from home, but to each their own.

Anonymous wrote:So many "mothers" on this forum do not really want to be moms. They just want some credit for reproducing.

Absolutely. I definitely judge someone’s worthiness as a mother by how much laundry they personally do each week. Vaginas are necessary for laundry and laundry proficiency is definitely linked to bond with children, so it makes perfect sense.

Anonymous wrote:So many "mothers" on this forum do not really want to be moms. They just want some credit for reproducing.

NP. What an absolutely hateful comment. OP reached out for help and compassion, and you come in with this patriarchal jackassery. Bye.

hire me for all your folding, meal prep, general organizing around the house. I charge $40/per hr and super highly efficient ))) Min visit 3 hrs!