In Seattle you can register to get state funding for doing things that would otherwise be done by the government, like rides to doctor .

I think that the biggest thing about throwing money at things is the the other siblings don't want you to spend their inheritance. So, they are benefiting from your free labor by mom not spending her money on care. This unpaid labor does not benefit you, it benefits the other siblings. They don't want you spending their inheritance. They don't want mom to have to pay for it either, because again it will reduce their inheritance.

I guess I was lucky, in that my brother passed before my dad. And my dad had money to fund his care.