Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have a husband problem, not a SIL problem. That husband didn't tell you is the problem, not that he's invited and not you, not that SIL invited him and not you.

I don't know, if there have been multiple "beefs" with his sister since they got married, and OP's reaction is to try to "crash a wedding" - sounds like he has a wife problem.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should let him know that you found out.

You should then ask him to ask his sister if you can go.

Respect the answer you get back.

If you aren't invited, there's a reason, and crashing is wrong. Who knows what it is. But it's the wedding couple's day, and a respectful person would not seek to detract from it.

This might mean your SIL has permanently written off your relationship. But so what. If you are already estranged it doesn't really matter if you are not there.

OP here. Is it not wrong to invite someone without spouse? What god united, men can’t separate. We are a family unit and in-laws are all devout Catholics.

OMG. You are not invited! She does not want YOU there. Why do you want to be where you are not wanted. Be gracious.

If I were you - I would tell DH I know about the invite and I am hurt. I would tell hem I wanted to go for family unity and I don't understand why I wasn't invited. Then the ball is in his court. He needs to smooth this over with his family. If you are all devout catholics, as you say, then YOU should be his priority. If you are not his priority, there is a problem in your marriage. But honestly, you sound like the sort of person who creates waves and drama. I would never invite extra drama, so this wouldn't happen to me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should let him know that you found out.

You should then ask him to ask his sister if you can go.

Respect the answer you get back.

If you aren't invited, there's a reason, and crashing is wrong. Who knows what it is. But it's the wedding couple's day, and a respectful person would not seek to detract from it.

This might mean your SIL has permanently written off your relationship. But so what. If you are already estranged it doesn't really matter if you are not there.

OP here. Is it not wrong to invite someone without spouse? What god united, men can’t separate. We are a family unit and in-laws are all devout Catholics.

Anonymous wrote:You have a husband problem, not a SIL problem. That husband didn't tell you is the problem, not that he's invited and not you, not that SIL invited him and not you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should let him know that you found out.

You should then ask him to ask his sister if you can go.

Respect the answer you get back.

If you aren't invited, there's a reason, and crashing is wrong. Who knows what it is. But it's the wedding couple's day, and a respectful person would not seek to detract from it.

This might mean your SIL has permanently written off your relationship. But so what. If you are already estranged it doesn't really matter if you are not there.

OP here. Is it not wrong to invite someone without spouse? What god united, men can’t separate. We are a family unit and in-laws are all devout Catholics.

Now it becomes more clear why you weren't invited. No. People can invite or not invite anyone they like to their celebrations. You and your spouse are not conjoined twins.

+1
She probably doesn't want the added stress at her wedding. Give her the gift of your absence.

Anonymous wrote:SIL is getting married, she invited my spouse (her sibling) but not me. I found out by accident, spouse is hiding this from me. Its a small courthouse ceremony with half a dozen people. SIL was my bridesmaid 10 years ago, but there have been beefs since. My spouse claims he wants harmony between everybody, but is a people pleaser when it comes to family of origin. He doesnt know that i know. Do I crash the wedding?