Anonymous wrote:If that revelation happened to me I would immediately suspect there were other incidents of cheating also. It is highly unlikely he cheated for six months with an ex GF and then stopped and never cheated again after having totally gotten away with it.
I would not start trying to catch him at it or find evidence however. I would see a counselor for myself and try to figure out whether I wanted to be married to this guy.
Anonymous wrote:Time to go shopping! And get an f buddy.
Anonymous wrote:If that revelation happened to me I would immediately suspect there were other incidents of cheating also. It is highly unlikely he cheated for six months with an ex GF and then stopped and never cheated again after having totally gotten away with it.
I would not start trying to catch him at it or find evidence however. I would see a counselor for myself and try to figure out whether I wanted to be married to this guy.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If that revelation happened to me I would immediately suspect there were other incidents of cheating also. It is highly unlikely he cheated for six months with an ex GF and then stopped and never cheated again after having totally gotten away with it.
I would not start trying to catch him at it or find evidence however. I would see a counselor for myself and try to figure out whether I wanted to be married to this guy.
+1
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:That is pretty much the whole story. He slept with his college ex about every other week for 6 months during year 5 of our marriage. I'm pretty much shaking.
It depends on health of your marriage and if its worthy of forgiveness and moving on. Only you can decide. If you think its strong enough to survive this then he rational and use this information to your advantage for complete transparency. I'll provide ask him to sign a post nup favorable to you and the kids to avoid future occurrences.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Putting the most positive face on this, it seems likely that he got it out of his system and you "won".
Anyone that cheats like that is a promise-breaker and might do it again.
That doesn't mean you have to divorce.
You need to line up marital counseling that is objective - neither pro-reconciliation nor pro-divorce.
Don't catastrophize. Honor your feelings of sadness and betrayal. Your husband owes you full disclosure.
Do not contact or seek out the social media of the OW. She is morally reprehensible as well and you will get no peace from contacting her or seeking out details about her. She is not your concern.
I'm sorry for your hurt. Be brave.
What did she win? A decade of being married to a total douchebag?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Putting the most positive face on this, it seems likely that he got it out of his system and you "won".
Anyone that cheats like that is a promise-breaker and might do it again.
That doesn't mean you have to divorce.
You need to line up marital counseling that is objective - neither pro-reconciliation nor pro-divorce.
Don't catastrophize. Honor your feelings of sadness and betrayal. Your husband owes you full disclosure.
Do not contact or seek out the social media of the OW. She is morally reprehensible as well and you will get no peace from contacting her or seeking out details about her. She is not your concern.
I'm sorry for your hurt. Be brave.
What did she win? A decade of being married to a total douchebag?
Anonymous wrote:Is she hotter than you?