Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:34     Subject: Re:I regret getting dog
Anonymous wrote:Op - I will also add that when I thought we were getting a mid sized 40 pound dog my oldest 9 year old could help.

Now that our dog is 70+ pounds (and still growing) our kids can’t help. She has thrown two of the kids into a wall and tree when they were trying to hold her leash because she decided to chase something. So they are longer allowed to hold her leash ever.


Yep - and sometimes you get a golden doodle from a breeder that you think will be 40 pounds and he grows to be twice that. You’re trying to find a reason that will make you feel less guilty, I get that. But just own it - you had a idyllic vision of what dog life would be like and you didn’t get that and it sucks. So rehome if you really can’t deal, but feel guilty enough that you don’t get another dog, or at least not another young one. Just like with kids, you don’t know what you’re going to get - they grow to be different sizes and temperaments and you get what you get.
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:30     Subject: I regret getting dog
Rehoming our rescue puppy was gut wrenching and guilt inducing but it was the best decision. She was little but terrorizing my kids and the vet said she was untrainable—after we tried a trainer and dog psychologist.

We had been completely lied to about the breed. I know why rescue is best but the only calm, happy dogs I know came from fancy breeders.
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:28     Subject: I regret getting dog
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We have a year old mixed breed rescue who is very high energy. We have 3 young kids who can’t help so I am stuck with all dog related things. I take her on 2-3 walks a day plus running and an hour at a dog park.

She js fine as long as I do all of those things. But if I can’t do that then she is a terror and ruins everything. We are on vacation right now with her and she has to be on a leash non stop so she doesn’t ruin the house. And she doesn’t recall at all so she is never allowed off leash outside.

Do we just try and push through or try and rehome her? The rescue said she was a mid size lab mix. She isn’t at all. She is a 75 pound boxer/pit mix who is very strong and muscular.


There is nothing wrong with this dog because it is a “pit mix.” It sounds like it is just being a dog. Dogs are not people in fur suits- they need exercise. You are the ones setting up the dog and yourselves for failure.

Any dog that is 60 pounds + needs a lot of exercise or it will get frustrated. A lab would get frustrated and destructive. My well trained German Shepherd would get frustrated and possibly destructive. This is extremely basic information that no one should have had to beat you over the head with before getting a dog. My husband has to give our large dog a similar amount of exercise time each day and the dog has only slowed down slightly in middle age.

You knew that this dog needs a lot of exercise but you took her on vacation with you- why? Why not put her in a kennel? My dog does not like other dogs- he is otherwise well behaved, so we do not set him up for failure by taking him on vacation or putting him in unpredictable situations. The dog is not a toy or a robot- if you set her up for failure, she will fail because she is a living creature with needs. You can rehome her and get a different dog if you wish but recognize that dogs are not disposable toys- they are animals with their own quirks and annoyances and dispositions. The dog you replace her with may have a different set of issues even if purchased from a breeder.


Op - we are on vacation but she is still getting 4-5 miles of walks/runs a day. What she isn’t getting is dog park time because there isn’t one close by. We were in a house with other dogs but they have no fence so she can’t play outside because my dog will run away.


PP you are responding to- why not put her in dog sitting or kennel so you could get a break? It just sounds like the dog is way too much work for you and no one else is sharing the responsibility. My husband handles our large dog and he is a ton of work but my husband adores the dog and the dog adores him back. Without my husband I would rehome the dog because I know I can’t handle giving the dog what he needs. If your husband is not sharing the burden he shouldn’t get to tell you that you can’t rehome the dog. Just rehome the dog.
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:27     Subject: I regret getting dog
Yeah, as a training tip don’t ever run after the dog. You’re playing chase. It won’t work anyway. Running the other way is a good option if you lose control. Like have everyone yell excitedly and run towards the house. But that’s not training, it’s just tricking the dog to come back, so it will only work a few times in emergencies.
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:26     Subject: Re:I regret getting dog
Anonymous wrote:Op - I will also add that when I thought we were getting a mid sized 40 pound dog my oldest 9 year old could help.

Now that our dog is 70+ pounds (and still growing) our kids can’t help. She has thrown two of the kids into a wall and tree when they were trying to hold her leash because she decided to chase something. So they are longer allowed to hold her leash ever.


I don’t even let my 9 year old walk my 20 lb dog. It’s a lot.

What are you walking the dog on? Harness? Collar? Have you tried a front clip harness, head halter, or even a prong collar? (Normally I’m not a fan of prongs but if it’s a true safety issue it is a valid option!)
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:25     Subject: Re:I regret getting dog
I think you probably got the wrong type of dog for your current family situation. I agree with the others that this isn’t about whether the dog has any pit in it. Whether it’s lab, boxer, shepherd, etc. any of those mixes are high energy, very strong dogs. Taking it on vacation with all of the holiday excitement and being in a different place likely added anxiousness and excitement for the dog too.

When you get home, I would see if you can find a trainer to work one on one with your family to help all of you learn some tools. If you commit to keeping the dog, the energy level will probably get better as the dog approaches 3.
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:25     Subject: I regret getting dog
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why havent you trained recall (or literally anything) to your dog? Is it supposed to come recall trained?


Op - I do recall training but I do not have time every day to do training. She comes back in our backyard but nowhere else.

We have 3 young kids who are in sports and school and activity. I already spend 3 hours of my day with her.


If the dog returns from recall in the backyard what exactly is the problem? Your dog should not be off leash outside of your property. In most jurisdictions that is not even legal. You sound like you have unreasonable expectations for the dog.


Op - we have 100 acre property that no leash is needed (not in DC where we have a house with a backyard). I would love her to be able to be off leash but so far that has resulted in us running after her as she runs away.


That sounds awesome! You sadly may never have a dog with recall good enough to return on 100 acres. Probably good to start accepting that now. I have two dogs - one recall was pretty easy because he wants to be with us at all times. The other would see a rabbit and be absolutely gone no matter how hard I worked on recall. Dogs are different and even with breeders, you can’t quite know what you’re going to get.
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:24     Subject: I regret getting dog
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why havent you trained recall (or literally anything) to your dog? Is it supposed to come recall trained?


Op - I do recall training but I do not have time every day to do training. She comes back in our backyard but nowhere else.

We have 3 young kids who are in sports and school and activity. I already spend 3 hours of my day with her.


If the dog returns from recall in the backyard what exactly is the problem? Your dog should not be off leash outside of your property. In most jurisdictions that is not even legal. You sound like you have unreasonable expectations for the dog.


Op - we have 100 acre property that no leash is needed (not in DC where we have a house with a backyard). I would love her to be able to be off leash but so far that has resulted in us running after her as she runs away.


Do you have a long line? I trained my dogs recall using a 50 foot leash (not a flexi). It gave the appearance of freedom while giving me control to reel the dog in if it didn’t listen.

Side note: a trainer taught me that if my dog escapes and doesn’t come back when called, rather than chase I should turn and run the other way, and the dog will usually turn and chase you. It’s a game, not necessarily an escape plan. YMMV
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:23     Subject: Re:I regret getting dog
Op - I will also add that when I thought we were getting a mid sized 40 pound dog my oldest 9 year old could help.

Now that our dog is 70+ pounds (and still growing) our kids can’t help. She has thrown two of the kids into a wall and tree when they were trying to hold her leash because she decided to chase something. So they are longer allowed to hold her leash ever.
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:22     Subject: I regret getting dog
Yeah that doesn’t sound like a “vacation” - totally normal to have to be on a one-year-old dog 100% of the time in a strange space with no fenced yard. But still that sounds awful. Don’t do that to yourself next time. We vacationed without our puppy until she was quite old and more chill.
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:22     Subject: I regret getting dog
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We have a year old mixed breed rescue who is very high energy. We have 3 young kids who can’t help so I am stuck with all dog related things. I take her on 2-3 walks a day plus running and an hour at a dog park.

She js fine as long as I do all of those things. But if I can’t do that then she is a terror and ruins everything. We are on vacation right now with her and she has to be on a leash non stop so she doesn’t ruin the house. And she doesn’t recall at all so she is never allowed off leash outside.

Do we just try and push through or try and rehome her? The rescue said she was a mid size lab mix. She isn’t at all. She is a 75 pound boxer/pit mix who is very strong and muscular.


There is nothing wrong with this dog because it is a “pit mix.” It sounds like it is just being a dog. Dogs are not people in fur suits- they need exercise. You are the ones setting up the dog and yourselves for failure.

Any dog that is 60 pounds + needs a lot of exercise or it will get frustrated. A lab would get frustrated and destructive. My well trained German Shepherd would get frustrated and possibly destructive. This is extremely basic information that no one should have had to beat you over the head with before getting a dog. My husband has to give our large dog a similar amount of exercise time each day and the dog has only slowed down slightly in middle age.

You knew that this dog needs a lot of exercise but you took her on vacation with you- why? Why not put her in a kennel? My dog does not like other dogs- he is otherwise well behaved, so we do not set him up for failure by taking him on vacation or putting him in unpredictable situations. The dog is not a toy or a robot- if you set her up for failure, she will fail because she is a living creature with needs. You can rehome her and get a different dog if you wish but recognize that dogs are not disposable toys- they are animals with their own quirks and annoyances and dispositions. The dog you replace her with may have a different set of issues even if purchased from a breeder.


Op - we are on vacation but she is still getting 4-5 miles of walks/runs a day. What she isn’t getting is dog park time because there isn’t one close by. We were in a house with other dogs but they have no fence so she can’t play outside because my dog will run away.


Check out the website/app “Sniffspot”! People rent out their fenced yards/pastures/etc by the hour. Maybe there’s one nearby?
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:21     Subject: I regret getting dog
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why havent you trained recall (or literally anything) to your dog? Is it supposed to come recall trained?


Op - I do recall training but I do not have time every day to do training. She comes back in our backyard but nowhere else.

We have 3 young kids who are in sports and school and activity. I already spend 3 hours of my day with her.


If the dog returns from recall in the backyard what exactly is the problem? Your dog should not be off leash outside of your property. In most jurisdictions that is not even legal. You sound like you have unreasonable expectations for the dog.


Op - we have 100 acre property that no leash is needed (not in DC where we have a house with a backyard). I would love her to be able to be off leash but so far that has resulted in us running after her as she runs away.
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:21     Subject: I regret getting dog
OP, this is the worst of it. You have an adolescent, energetic dog. Within 6-12 months the dog should calm down immensely. As a teenager, he’s pushing boundaries, forgetting seemingly trained commands, and has ridiculous energy. All completely normal.

If you can hang on until maturity, you will likely have a nice dog. If you can’t, then you learned your lesson and can skip a dog until the kids aren’t as needy.

We currently have an 8 month old Australian shepherd mix who just wants to run run run for hours a day. We taught him frisbee (exercise with a retrieve which is a built in recall!) and it has helped immensely.

It’s also super helpful to have a dog who can settle in a crate. Gives you a break from the leash. My puppy spends a couple hours in the crate every day as forced relaxation with chewies and a bed and has learned it is a place to be calm. Life saving!

But at the end of the day if you’re all miserable, then the best thing you can do is rehome. Expect it to take a while though—the market is saturated with dogs right now as return to office continues and people rehome dogs they got during work from home.
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:20     Subject: I regret getting dog
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We have a year old mixed breed rescue who is very high energy. We have 3 young kids who can’t help so I am stuck with all dog related things. I take her on 2-3 walks a day plus running and an hour at a dog park.

She js fine as long as I do all of those things. But if I can’t do that then she is a terror and ruins everything. We are on vacation right now with her and she has to be on a leash non stop so she doesn’t ruin the house. And she doesn’t recall at all so she is never allowed off leash outside.

Do we just try and push through or try and rehome her? The rescue said she was a mid size lab mix. She isn’t at all. She is a 75 pound boxer/pit mix who is very strong and muscular.


There is nothing wrong with this dog because it is a “pit mix.” It sounds like it is just being a dog. Dogs are not people in fur suits- they need exercise. You are the ones setting up the dog and yourselves for failure.

Any dog that is 60 pounds + needs a lot of exercise or it will get frustrated. A lab would get frustrated and destructive. My well trained German Shepherd would get frustrated and possibly destructive. This is extremely basic information that no one should have had to beat you over the head with before getting a dog. My husband has to give our large dog a similar amount of exercise time each day and the dog has only slowed down slightly in middle age.

You knew that this dog needs a lot of exercise but you took her on vacation with you- why? Why not put her in a kennel? My dog does not like other dogs- he is otherwise well behaved, so we do not set him up for failure by taking him on vacation or putting him in unpredictable situations. The dog is not a toy or a robot- if you set her up for failure, she will fail because she is a living creature with needs. You can rehome her and get a different dog if you wish but recognize that dogs are not disposable toys- they are animals with their own quirks and annoyances and dispositions. The dog you replace her with may have a different set of issues even if purchased from a breeder.


Op - we are on vacation but she is still getting 4-5 miles of walks/runs a day. What she isn’t getting is dog park time because there isn’t one close by. We were in a house with other dogs but they have no fence so she can’t play outside because my dog will run away.
Anonymous
Post 12/28/2023 08:19     Subject: I regret getting dog
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why havent you trained recall (or literally anything) to your dog? Is it supposed to come recall trained?


Op - I do recall training but I do not have time every day to do training. She comes back in our backyard but nowhere else.

We have 3 young kids who are in sports and school and activity. I already spend 3 hours of my day with her.


I’m really sorry, OP, this is a lot for you and I get that. But three walks a day and consistent, daily training is absolutely normal. Those month-long intensives are kind of crap - it teaches YOU how to train and maybe kick starts it, but it’s consistency over the long haul that is needed. What you have is very typical - you just made a mistake thinking you could handle it.


It IS normal, but it’s much, much easier with a Pomeranian. We’re talking hours a day, every day. Less time for exercising them, less time for training them.