Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 21:07     Subject: Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Sounds like you care more than your kid, and you’ve probably been egging them on. Give it a rest. The “top 20” ED admit that your kid got is surely good enough for you to hold your head up at cocktail parties.
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 21:06     Subject: Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:ED is mentally tough for all. If you don’t get it, you feel you “wasted” your ED shot by aiming too high. If you do get it, you wonder if you should have aimed higher. I think your child will work through this and get excited again. But I also think their emotions are totally normal and justified.

ED1 was perfect for us. DS is thrilled. Not “mentally tough” at all. Just the opposite.


ED1 is "perfect" if that is by far your only TOP choice. If you have a few that your kid really likes, then even if they picked one it is natural to feel "buyer's remorse".
It also sucks if it is by far the top choice and you get deferred. Then you have to decide, do I wait for April or pick an ED2 with my 2nd choice. That's what happened to my kid. They decided to wait and were rejected ultimately. Thankfully they got into what would have been their ED2 choice and are attending happily.



Ohhh that does sound like a really hard choice. Glad it worked out in the end.
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 21:05     Subject: Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:UMDCP has an excellent economics department, which is T20 for that field and is not a stretch like HYPS.


without hooks HYPS is a crapshoot


But DC actually had a hook, that's part of the regret. Not many have a hook to HYPSM and DC did but didn't use it.


Then that means DC really didn't want to go there. It's okay---not everyone wants to attend HYPSM


OP here, I don't think you understood the point of this thread.
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 21:04     Subject: Re:Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Is there anyway to get out of ED? We are suffering from deep buyers remorse. Problem is, got some rolling admissions that seem like a better fit.


For parents of younger students, please take this post as a cautionary tale about valuing gaining admission to the “best” school a kid can possibly get into over. focusing first and foremost on fit. This story is pretty common


I think that you misunderstand this thread. Seems that the applicant regrets loss of chance at prestige, not fit.


OP here - Yes, that's right, the PP is offbase. DC was very focused on fit overall in their search so both schools would have fit. The school not applied to (HYPSM) is very high prestige and would have been a decent fit. The ED1 school that DC was accepted to is still well-regarded but isn't HYPSM. It seems like a perfect fit.

So this is a story about a kid who valued fit over prestige but now wonders if they could have gotten into HYPSM.


NP. Folks can tell stories of their kids' experiences all day long here, OP, and that's fine as cautionary tales for other parents reading this but -- what are you doing regarding your own student? I hope you're not feeding the remorse, even inadvertently. It's a done deal and you yourself have said the ED school is the better fit. The remorse is fairly natural but please be sure not to give it oxygen. Acknowledging it once coolly is fine, absolutely, but after that? Be sure your DC moves on and builds excitement about the rest of senior year and the prospect of the excellent-fit LAC. If DC gets stuck on remorse, I'd talk to the high school's college counselor (you, not your DC) and ask for ideas on how to get DC unstuck and enthusiastic about moving on. I do know one kid (friend's DC) who got kind of mired in "I'll never know, I might have had choices" after an ED acceptance, and that created some difficult months in what should have been a positive senior year.


Of course we are not feeding the remorse. This is why I am posting, to see if others have been in this situation and how they got their kid to move on.
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 21:02     Subject: Re:Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'll share Groucho Marx' thought on ED admissions:

"I don't want to join any club that would have me as a member."


Uh wut — this would also apply to being accepted regular decision


right but when you're RD you know who accepted you and who did not. You have a full range of choices with full info. With ED, you'll never know who else would have accepted you.
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 19:11     Subject: Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
I applied as a legacy to HYPSM and also to the school I loved the most. Got in to both. Picked the HYPSM. Why? Bc like most people there, I couldn’t turn it down. Didn’t particularly like my undergrad experience. Still believe that LACs provide better undergrad educations.

Your kid made the choice they did knowing they were a double legacy somewhere else. They went w fit over higher prestige. That was the right call then and it is now. (And as you note, it’s a high class problem). Enjoy being done and be glad they didn’t go the other way - where they easily could’ve been deferred and risked losing their spot at the LAC.
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 17:01     Subject: Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:UMDCP has an excellent economics department, which is T20 for that field and is not a stretch like HYPS.


without hooks HYPS is a crapshoot


But DC actually had a hook, that's part of the regret. Not many have a hook to HYPSM and DC did but didn't use it.


Then that means DC really didn't want to go there. It's okay---not everyone wants to attend HYPSM
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 17:01     Subject: Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:UMDCP has an excellent economics department, which is T20 for that field and is not a stretch like HYPS.


without hooks HYPS is a crapshoot


But DC actually had a hook, that's part of the regret. Not many have a hook to HYPSM and DC did but didn't use it.


If DC's the one bringing up that hook now, well, it's water under the proverbial bridge, and I'd gently steer DC away from that thinking. Why did DC prefer the ED school to begin with? What programs/majors caught DC's attention? What about the campus or campus life was attractive enough to merit that ED? And so on.

Does the ED college have an "accepted students day" in the spring? Look now and see if one is scheduled; if not, keep checking, get on the mailing list for it and register for it ASAP. Make the trip there to attend it. It'll be worth the effort. Your DC needs a shot of rah-rah and a fun visit to campus, and at an accepted students' weekend or day, will meet other rising freshmen who will be there in the fall. That could help a lot.
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 16:57     Subject: Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:I think a lot of kids are in your child's position if the ED school isn't a clear first choice (or if they change their thinking over the course of the admissions season).


And if ED isn't the clear first choice, then you can change it to RD/EA before the ED1 comes out. You should never do ED1/ED2 unless it is definately your top choice
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 16:56     Subject: Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:ED is mentally tough for all. If you don’t get it, you feel you “wasted” your ED shot by aiming too high. If you do get it, you wonder if you should have aimed higher. I think your child will work through this and get excited again. But I also think their emotions are totally normal and justified.

ED1 was perfect for us. DS is thrilled. Not “mentally tough” at all. Just the opposite.


ED1 is "perfect" if that is by far your only TOP choice. If you have a few that your kid really likes, then even if they picked one it is natural to feel "buyer's remorse".
It also sucks if it is by far the top choice and you get deferred. Then you have to decide, do I wait for April or pick an ED2 with my 2nd choice. That's what happened to my kid. They decided to wait and were rejected ultimately. Thankfully they got into what would have been their ED2 choice and are attending happily.

Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 16:52     Subject: Re:Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Is there anyway to get out of ED? We are suffering from deep buyers remorse. Problem is, got some rolling admissions that seem like a better fit.


For parents of younger students, please take this post as a cautionary tale about valuing gaining admission to the “best” school a kid can possibly get into over. focusing first and foremost on fit. This story is pretty common


I think that you misunderstand this thread. Seems that the applicant regrets loss of chance at prestige, not fit.


OP here - Yes, that's right, the PP is offbase. DC was very focused on fit overall in their search so both schools would have fit. The school not applied to (HYPSM) is very high prestige and would have been a decent fit. The ED1 school that DC was accepted to is still well-regarded but isn't HYPSM. It seems like a perfect fit.

So this is a story about a kid who valued fit over prestige but now wonders if they could have gotten into HYPSM.


NP. Folks can tell stories of their kids' experiences all day long here, OP, and that's fine as cautionary tales for other parents reading this but -- what are you doing regarding your own student? I hope you're not feeding the remorse, even inadvertently. It's a done deal and you yourself have said the ED school is the better fit. The remorse is fairly natural but please be sure not to give it oxygen. Acknowledging it once coolly is fine, absolutely, but after that? Be sure your DC moves on and builds excitement about the rest of senior year and the prospect of the excellent-fit LAC. If DC gets stuck on remorse, I'd talk to the high school's college counselor (you, not your DC) and ask for ideas on how to get DC unstuck and enthusiastic about moving on. I do know one kid (friend's DC) who got kind of mired in "I'll never know, I might have had choices" after an ED acceptance, and that created some difficult months in what should have been a positive senior year.
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 16:40     Subject: Re:Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:I'll share Groucho Marx' thought on ED admissions:

"I don't want to join any club that would have me as a member."


Uh wut — this would also apply to being accepted regular decision
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 16:35     Subject: Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
They do
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 14:18     Subject: Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We know several kids that applied to WashU RD last year and were denied. Significantly lower stat student from the same school was admitted ED. One data point, but interesting nonetheless.


Not picking on WashU, but ED is more about parents’ ability to pay and matriculation rates than anything to do with the student. Whole groups of students-legacies, recruited athletes- who are typically full pay are pushed to apply ED. It’s not an accident that Harvard’s classes are all 50% full pay.


I thought Harvard has REA not ED?
Anonymous
Post 12/27/2023 14:17     Subject: Any regrets on applying and getting accepted ED?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:UMDCP has an excellent economics department, which is T20 for that field and is not a stretch like HYPS.


without hooks HYPS is a crapshoot


But DC actually had a hook, that's part of the regret. Not many have a hook to HYPSM and DC did but didn't use it.