Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 15:48     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Okay I figured it out. All of the emails (1 email) and papers (1 paper) didn't say you had to come early. It just said "Morning xmas program". I didn't know that meant parents must attend the program at 11:30 am and another mom who doesn't attend the church didn't know as well. We both showed up at the regular time.
When my older child was in preschool it was during covid. They had parties and some parents may have volunteered but we weren't required to be at the party. I think it would make sense for the school calendar to have the time of the xmas party and the email to have a different subject. Being invited to a party that happens during school is confusing because it was mandatory.





I don't see what the church has to do with it. I've been at several church affiliated preschools and they are separate. The school does it's own thing that has nothing to do with the church. Every year there was a Christmas program and then break started immediately after. But they would explicitly say "please make sure someone can attend with your child."
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 15:41     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Schools send so many emails. Most parents forget stuff. Don't be hard on yourself. DH should be more involved.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 15:19     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
OP here. Okay I figured it out. All of the emails (1 email) and papers (1 paper) didn't say you had to come early. It just said "Morning xmas program". I didn't know that meant parents must attend the program at 11:30 am and another mom who doesn't attend the church didn't know as well. We both showed up at the regular time.
When my older child was in preschool it was during covid. They had parties and some parents may have volunteered but we weren't required to be at the party. I think it would make sense for the school calendar to have the time of the xmas party and the email to have a different subject. Being invited to a party that happens during school is confusing because it was mandatory.



Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 15:07     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, you titled your post "Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show," but you do not actually feel bad about it, it seems. Unless you count feeling angry at the school and defensive when others don't agree with you.


Op, the women on here are catty. They have nothing better to do with themselves then to sit on DCUM while they should be at work pouncing on people.
It's pathetic really.


We're just pointing out the obvious. OP said she was late. Her OP is full of "I". I didn't read the email. I was late. I work. I got the call. She has made it known she is the point person for all of this. The school takes the path of least resistance. Nowhere did she say it's husband's job to go thru the folder, or handle pick up, or be the first number listed. She messed up and now wants to pretend that it had nothing to do with her, somebody else is to blame "public schools would never do this" yet she's in a part-time church preschool.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 14:53     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:OP, you titled your post "Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show," but you do not actually feel bad about it, it seems. Unless you count feeling angry at the school and defensive when others don't agree with you.


Op, the women on here are catty. They have nothing better to do with themselves then to sit on DCUM while they should be at work pouncing on people.
It's pathetic really.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 14:50     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
OP, you titled your post "Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show," but you do not actually feel bad about it, it seems. Unless you count feeling angry at the school and defensive when others don't agree with you.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 14:47     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This one’s on you, OP. Pay attention to school notices going forward and stop blaming others.


It's on BOTH OF THE PARENTS, not OP. The kid has two parents.


OP says she is the one who threw away the flyer without reading it, and didn't read the email.

Now, it's possible that her spouse also ignored communications, but a school can't be blamed for being sexist if they sent something home in the backpack and the parent who emptied it was female, or if a family doesn't give a shared email for home/school communication.

I'm also entirely unsure how OP told the difference between singular and plural "you" on the phone.

I'm a teacher. I make an effort to include both parents on communication, but if I've got a kid left behind at the end of the day I have to call someone first, and I'll start with the parent who does pick up.



The plural of you is y’all


OP here. Because she called me and greeted me in the VM with my name. She said Z is alone because you aren't here. She didn't call my husband or mention she would call him in the VM. She also said I was expected to pick him up at 11:30 am, not his parents, not dad, me, me, me. When we are at the gym childcare guess who calls me for diaper changes even when dad is at the gym and dad left his number on the sheet? They call me. Another mom also got it mixed up. Both of us aren't members of the church. I think a lot of the moms are SAHM and most attend the church. They have a mom group at the church. The other mom I spoke to has a similar work schedule. We are both in the medical field and work crazy hours. I wish DH would also keep on on some of the school stuff. Some days like today I am so sleep deprived from work 15 hour days. This morning at 11:30 am I would have rather attended the party. Instead I was answering another call about my older sons IEP and he had an accident at school. The brakes on our car weren't stopping well while I was on the phone with the school. It was scary because we live in a very hilly part of the US. After that call I decided not to take anymore because I wanted to drive super slow back home.






Sounds like you need something more robust than a part-time Christian church basement preschool. Which is literally called "Mother's Day Out" in some places. You are the normal pick up person, naturally they called you.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 14:46     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP I totally get feeling upset about this but a note in the folder and an email home should definitely be enough. Part of having a kid in school is keeping up with this stuff. Are you listed first as the POC for your child? Unless you didn't pick up the call, I wouldn't expect them to call your husband.


The email was 2 weeks ago. Public.school don't do this s***
They can't just decide they won't be with your kid 2 week before. It doesn't work like that. The email also send it had an invite to the party but didn't mention they had to be picked up early.



Op here. Sorry at work now. So many typos. This is my second child. When the school has early dismissal it is generally better communicated. That's my point. In the email that was sent 2 weeks ago, the email body did not mention details about early pickup. It just mentions sending the invitation to the party. It would have been better if the email said early pickup because they are changing the childcare agreement. We have another early pickup just a few weeks ago for Thanksgiving party/ singing show.


So you should know that this event happens every year and been prepared. Not reading the messages is no excuse. Your poor kid was the only one with no parent there. How sad.[/quote

He is 4 and he was eating cookies. I'm sure he's fine. Not every parent can take off of work for these events. It sounds like she works from home.




Then you don't send your kid to preschool that day if you can't make the pick up time.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 14:45     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This one’s on you, OP. Pay attention to school notices going forward and stop blaming others.


It's on BOTH OF THE PARENTS, not OP. The kid has two parents.


OP says she is the one who threw away the flyer without reading it, and didn't read the email.

Now, it's possible that her spouse also ignored communications, but a school can't be blamed for being sexist if they sent something home in the backpack and the parent who emptied it was female, or if a family doesn't give a shared email for home/school communication.

I'm also entirely unsure how OP told the difference between singular and plural "you" on the phone.

I'm a teacher. I make an effort to include both parents on communication, but if I've got a kid left behind at the end of the day I have to call someone first, and I'll start with the parent who does pick up.



The plural of you is y’all


OP here. Because she called me and greeted me in the VM with my name. She said Z is alone because you aren't here. She didn't call my husband or mention she would call him in the VM. She also said I was expected to pick him up at 11:30 am, not his parents, not dad, me, me, me. When we are at the gym childcare guess who calls me for diaper changes even when dad is at the gym and dad left his number on the sheet? They call me. Another mom also got it mixed up. Both of us aren't members of the church. I think a lot of the moms are SAHM and most attend the church. They have a mom group at the church. The other mom I spoke to has a similar work schedule. We are both in the medical field and work crazy hours. I wish DH would also keep on on some of the school stuff. Some days like today I am so sleep deprived from work 15 hour days. This morning at 11:30 am I would have rather attended the party. Instead I was answering another call about my older sons IEP and he had an accident at school. The brakes on our car weren't stopping well while I was on the phone with the school. It was scary because we live in a very hilly part of the US. After that call I decided not to take anymore because I wanted to drive super slow back home.




Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 14:44     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This one’s on you, OP. Pay attention to school notices going forward and stop blaming others.


It's on BOTH OF THE PARENTS, not OP. The kid has two parents.


OP says she is the one who threw away the flyer without reading it, and didn't read the email.

Now, it's possible that her spouse also ignored communications, but a school can't be blamed for being sexist if they sent something home in the backpack and the parent who emptied it was female, or if a family doesn't give a shared email for home/school communication.

I'm also entirely unsure how OP told the difference between singular and plural "you" on the phone.

I'm a teacher. I make an effort to include both parents on communication, but if I've got a kid left behind at the end of the day I have to call someone first, and I'll start with the parent who does pick up.


You aren't that bright. It's not the school that is sexist. The person called her, mom (OP), and said thier child is alone because YOU (the mom) isn't here. They did not call dad. They did not say the kid was alone because his dad also forgot. Women are the ones who do the blaming and then they complain society doesn't expect both parents to do the parenting equally. You can't win.




If the OP comes back and confirmed that the VM said "you isn't there", I will change my comment about not knowing whether it was singular or plural you. I will also suggest that she find a preschool where people speak properly.

Married couples divide up responsibilities. It's not my job to police who unpacks a backpack in their own house. It's not my job to decide whether mom always picks up due to sexism, or because she's the one who works closest and dad does other things. But, for any given family, I'm going to expect what I see. If I only see mom pick up, then when no one shows up, I'm going to call mom's number first. If a family's routine is that mom unpacks the backpack, because she's home when the kid and backpack get home, and she does or doesn't tell Dad about a flyer, I'm not sexist because I put the flyer in the backpack to begin with. The school presumably emailed to the email they were given, put the flyer in the backpack that goes to the house where both parents live, and called the person who picks up most days. That isn't sexist, it's common sense.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 14:38     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This one’s on you, OP. Pay attention to school notices going forward and stop blaming others.


It's on BOTH OF THE PARENTS, not OP. The kid has two parents.


And a daycare program!
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 14:38     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:So your preschool had a lovely event that they invited parents to and provided cookies for. And you couldn't be bothered to open either and email or a paper that was sent home with your kids. How do you want contacted?! Sheesh.

I love that my kids' preschool does things like this. There is always one or two parents that don't attend and it's okay (well some of the kids cry). I doubt it was a Christmas party, it was probably called a holiday party, but either way, I'm sure they weren't reading about the birth of Jesus. It was likely some secular santa stuff with red and green cookies.

Also, if you don't celebrate, then you can't pretend to be super busy this time of year.


OP is being ridiculous, but so is this sentence. I don't celebrate Christmas but I'm super busy this time of year because I have lots to do at work before all the people who celebrate/take time off this time of year disappear, plus school concerts at my kids' schools, work holiday parties, etc. (and all of this after celebrating my own 8-night holiday!).
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 14:37     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP I totally get feeling upset about this but a note in the folder and an email home should definitely be enough. Part of having a kid in school is keeping up with this stuff. Are you listed first as the POC for your child? Unless you didn't pick up the call, I wouldn't expect them to call your husband.


The email was 2 weeks ago. Public.school don't do this s***
They can't just decide they won't be with your kid 2 week before. It doesn't work like that. The email also send it had an invite to the party but didn't mention they had to be picked up early.



Op here. Sorry at work now. So many typos. This is my second child. When the school has early dismissal it is generally better communicated. That's my point. In the email that was sent 2 weeks ago, the email body did not mention details about early pickup. It just mentions sending the invitation to the party. It would have been better if the email said early pickup because they are changing the childcare agreement. We have another early pickup just a few weeks ago for Thanksgiving party/ singing show.


That's adorable that they care enough about your kid to do things like this. Public schools do not.


Public school for 2 year olds?
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 14:37     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This one’s on you, OP. Pay attention to school notices going forward and stop blaming others.


It's on BOTH OF THE PARENTS, not OP. The kid has two parents.


It makes you and OP feel better to share the blame/guilt with the husband. But the kid wanted his mother to be there.


See there it is again. "The kid wants his mom", not dad. BS. He wanted anyone to be there. I'm sure he was happy otherwise eating cookies. He was with his teachers and he's 4. From what OP said they were all still there at the party when she arrived. The kid wasn't sitting alone in the dark waiting for his mom to pick him up.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2023 14:36     Subject: Feel bad late to early pick up at preschool because of xmas show
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This one’s on you, OP. Pay attention to school notices going forward and stop blaming others.


It's on BOTH OF THE PARENTS, not OP. The kid has two parents.


OP says she is the one who threw away the flyer without reading it, and didn't read the email.

Now, it's possible that her spouse also ignored communications, but a school can't be blamed for being sexist if they sent something home in the backpack and the parent who emptied it was female, or if a family doesn't give a shared email for home/school communication.

I'm also entirely unsure how OP told the difference between singular and plural "you" on the phone.

I'm a teacher. I make an effort to include both parents on communication, but if I've got a kid left behind at the end of the day I have to call someone first, and I'll start with the parent who does pick up.



The plural of you is y’all