Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"I absolutely can't afford what women here charge, are there foreign countries where women will take less to endanger their life for me to get a dolly with my DNA?"

This is a stupid and cruel remark. Try being a human.

On behalf of every woman who has suffered infertility and loss, f**k you.

+ 1 million. I really think the people posting these evil comments are murders sitting in jail, seeing how much they can hurt innocent people from the inside.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you want to travel to some poor country and pay an impoverished woman to get pregnant and carry your child? That seems ethical to you?

Bet you pay impoverished women to produce your adorbz housewares and clothing all the time. Hypocrite.

You think producing clothing is the same effect on a body as carrying a child? Are you a man or something? No way a woman would compare these two.

Speak for yourself. I’m a woman and I’d much rather get well paid for being pregnant again than work for less than minimum wage in a factory.

How do we determine what is well paid to carry a pregnancy and birth a child?

OP is trying to cut corners and pay as little as possible by going to a poor country. How much is a bio child worth?

A biological child is priceless to me. I am thankful that fertility was a nonissue for me, but I know I would never adopt. DH has an adopted sister who has been nothing but a heartache for his family. She was adopted as a baby. She was treated with love and kindness, but became a nightmare in high school and it has never stopped. She is mentally ill, most likely inherited, and has repeated problems with drug abuse and the law and with running away. My in laws have done everything imaginable for her, but it’s useless. Sure, this can happen with a biological child, but it’s different when it does. My in laws feel burdened in a way that wouldn’t with a biological child.

OP isn’t trying to cut corners as you say. She says she has around $50,000 to $70,000 to spend on a surrogate. She is seeking to find one in a country where that is a lot more money than $200,000 is in the US. Do you know what kind of a difference $20,000, let alone $50,000 would make to a poor woman in India. It’s a shame this was outlawed there. The rich people in that country really do not care about the poor ones and will do anything to keep them down, under the guise of “protecting” them.

Do not pay attention to these trolls, OP! Good luck to you!!!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you want to travel to some poor country and pay an impoverished woman to get pregnant and carry your child? That seems ethical to you?

Bet you pay impoverished women to produce your adorbz housewares and clothing all the time. Hypocrite.

You think producing clothing is the same effect on a body as carrying a child? Are you a man or something? No way a woman would compare these two.

No, I'm not a man, and I've given birth.

But you're a hypocrite if you think that making money with your special sacred womb-chalice should be in a different category than people (men and women) wrecking their bodies performing punishing, unprotected manual labor, which is exactly what happens every single so that y'all can have your cute holiday decor and other consumer goods.

I'll never forget an article I read years ago about Indian surrogacy. The woman interviewed had literally been breaking rocks for a living before then. When asked if she felt exploited by surrogacy, she laughed politely and said "no, when I was breaking rocks for little money, that was being exploited".

But then I also think that sex work should be legal, safe, and well-paid, so I doubt we'll agree on this one.

I too agree that sex work is work. But how do you value pregnancy and childbirth? Who decides? When people like OP "cant afford" to pay the rate here, they go elsewhere, looking for someone - anyone- who will accept what they want to pay. They dont want to pay to support these women or make the industry better, they want to pay as little as possible for someone else to put their life on the line for them to get a bio baby. It's not quite the same (to me). I'm not saying outlaw it, but I am saying there are issues people are choosing to ignore that are exploitative and harmful just to get some of their DNA in a mini-me.

You value it as physical work that can imperil someone's health, that is full-time, that requires a great amount of commitment, and that can be unpredictable in its difficulty.

That describes other jobs that don't involve wombs, as well. A special preciousness about wombs (as opposed to other muscles) is, I think, worth questioning.

Most other jobs arent 24/7 for 10 months, requiring medical tests, check ups, changes in diet etc. Pregnancy (not even including birth) means excluding certain foods, drinks, taking different vitamins and supplements. This isn't "oh its a 12h day thats hard", you cant go home and clock out of pregnancy.

I totally agree -- it should be valued as a job that is 24/7, like working at McMurdo or the space station.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you want to travel to some poor country and pay an impoverished woman to get pregnant and carry your child? That seems ethical to you?

Bet you pay impoverished women to produce your adorbz housewares and clothing all the time. Hypocrite.

You think producing clothing is the same effect on a body as carrying a child? Are you a man or something? No way a woman would compare these two.

No, I'm not a man, and I've given birth.

But you're a hypocrite if you think that making money with your special sacred womb-chalice should be in a different category than people (men and women) wrecking their bodies performing punishing, unprotected manual labor, which is exactly what happens every single so that y'all can have your cute holiday decor and other consumer goods.

I'll never forget an article I read years ago about Indian surrogacy. The woman interviewed had literally been breaking rocks for a living before then. When asked if she felt exploited by surrogacy, she laughed politely and said "no, when I was breaking rocks for little money, that was being exploited".

But then I also think that sex work should be legal, safe, and well-paid, so I doubt we'll agree on this one.

I too agree that sex work is work. But how do you value pregnancy and childbirth? Who decides? When people like OP "cant afford" to pay the rate here, they go elsewhere, looking for someone - anyone- who will accept what they want to pay. They dont want to pay to support these women or make the industry better, they want to pay as little as possible for someone else to put their life on the line for them to get a bio baby. It's not quite the same (to me). I'm not saying outlaw it, but I am saying there are issues people are choosing to ignore that are exploitative and harmful just to get some of their DNA in a mini-me.

You value it as physical work that can imperil someone's health, that is full-time, that requires a great amount of commitment, and that can be unpredictable in its difficulty.

That describes other jobs that don't involve wombs, as well. A special preciousness about wombs (as opposed to other muscles) is, I think, worth questioning.

Most other jobs arent 24/7 for 10 months, requiring medical tests, check ups, changes in diet etc. Pregnancy (not even including birth) means excluding certain foods, drinks, taking different vitamins and supplements. This isn't "oh its a 12h day thats hard", you cant go home and clock out of pregnancy.

Anonymous wrote:"I absolutely can't afford what women here charge, are there foreign countries where women will take less to endanger their life for me to get a dolly with my DNA?"

This is a stupid and cruel remark. Try being a human.

On behalf of every woman who has suffered infertility and loss, f**k you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you want to travel to some poor country and pay an impoverished woman to get pregnant and carry your child? That seems ethical to you?

Bet you pay impoverished women to produce your adorbz housewares and clothing all the time. Hypocrite.

You think producing clothing is the same effect on a body as carrying a child? Are you a man or something? No way a woman would compare these two.

No, I'm not a man, and I've given birth.

But you're a hypocrite if you think that making money with your special sacred womb-chalice should be in a different category than people (men and women) wrecking their bodies performing punishing, unprotected manual labor, which is exactly what happens every single so that y'all can have your cute holiday decor and other consumer goods.

I'll never forget an article I read years ago about Indian surrogacy. The woman interviewed had literally been breaking rocks for a living before then. When asked if she felt exploited by surrogacy, she laughed politely and said "no, when I was breaking rocks for little money, that was being exploited".

But then I also think that sex work should be legal, safe, and well-paid, so I doubt we'll agree on this one.

I too agree that sex work is work. But how do you value pregnancy and childbirth? Who decides? When people like OP "cant afford" to pay the rate here, they go elsewhere, looking for someone - anyone- who will accept what they want to pay. They dont want to pay to support these women or make the industry better, they want to pay as little as possible for someone else to put their life on the line for them to get a bio baby. It's not quite the same (to me). I'm not saying outlaw it, but I am saying there are issues people are choosing to ignore that are exploitative and harmful just to get some of their DNA in a mini-me.

You value it as physical work that can imperil someone's health, that is full-time, that requires a great amount of commitment, and that can be unpredictable in its difficulty.

That describes other jobs that don't involve wombs, as well. A special preciousness about wombs (as opposed to other muscles) is, I think, worth questioning.

"I absolutely can't afford what women here charge, are there foreign countries where women will take less to endanger their life for me to get a dolly with my DNA?"

Some adoptions are ethical and some are unethical. Some surrogacies are ethical and some are unethical. I didn't see OP saying that she intended to pay the least amount humanly possible -- I wouldn't assume such malice. She's also unlikely to be working without an agency, who will set the prices. If she vets the agency, then I don't see a problem.

NP. The practice is increasingly outlawed worldwide because it is exploitative and because of concerns about the health of the women and the baby. There are some countries that still allow it, but the list is diminishing as more is learned about surrogacy and its outcomes. OP can go to one of the remaining countries but eventually will have to explain what she did to the child that results.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you want to travel to some poor country and pay an impoverished woman to get pregnant and carry your child? That seems ethical to you?

Bet you pay impoverished women to produce your adorbz housewares and clothing all the time. Hypocrite.

You think producing clothing is the same effect on a body as carrying a child? Are you a man or something? No way a woman would compare these two.

No, I'm not a man, and I've given birth.

But you're a hypocrite if you think that making money with your special sacred womb-chalice should be in a different category than people (men and women) wrecking their bodies performing punishing, unprotected manual labor, which is exactly what happens every single so that y'all can have your cute holiday decor and other consumer goods.

I'll never forget an article I read years ago about Indian surrogacy. The woman interviewed had literally been breaking rocks for a living before then. When asked if she felt exploited by surrogacy, she laughed politely and said "no, when I was breaking rocks for little money, that was being exploited".

But then I also think that sex work should be legal, safe, and well-paid, so I doubt we'll agree on this one.

I too agree that sex work is work. But how do you value pregnancy and childbirth? Who decides? When people like OP "cant afford" to pay the rate here, they go elsewhere, looking for someone - anyone- who will accept what they want to pay. They dont want to pay to support these women or make the industry better, they want to pay as little as possible for someone else to put their life on the line for them to get a bio baby. It's not quite the same (to me). I'm not saying outlaw it, but I am saying there are issues people are choosing to ignore that are exploitative and harmful just to get some of their DNA in a mini-me.

Anonymous wrote:Not a whole lot of countries:

https://www.ivfconceptions.com/countries-where-surrogacy-is-legal/?amp=1

Correct. Most have outlawed to prevent wealthy foreigners from exploiting their women.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s essentially the same as men who go overseas for wives and girlfriends. Using your relative wealth compared to poorer countries in order to gain access to female bodies that you can’t have at home.

+1

Why can't people adopt?

Spoken as someone completely and willfully ignorant of the current realities of adoption.

I have an adopted child.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you want to travel to some poor country and pay an impoverished woman to get pregnant and carry your child? That seems ethical to you?

Bet you pay impoverished women to produce your adorbz housewares and clothing all the time. Hypocrite.

You think producing clothing is the same effect on a body as carrying a child? Are you a man or something? No way a woman would compare these two.

No, I'm not a man, and I've given birth.

But you're a hypocrite if you think that making money with your special sacred womb-chalice should be in a different category than people (men and women) wrecking their bodies performing punishing, unprotected manual labor, which is exactly what happens every single so that y'all can have your cute holiday decor and other consumer goods.

I'll never forget an article I read years ago about Indian surrogacy. The woman interviewed had literally been breaking rocks for a living before then. When asked if she felt exploited by surrogacy, she laughed politely and said "no, when I was breaking rocks for little money, that was being exploited".

But then I also think that sex work should be legal, safe, and well-paid, so I doubt we'll agree on this one.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s essentially the same as men who go overseas for wives and girlfriends. Using your relative wealth compared to poorer countries in order to gain access to female bodies that you can’t have at home.

+1

Why can't people adopt?

Spoken as someone completely and willfully ignorant of the current realities of adoption.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s essentially the same as men who go overseas for wives and girlfriends. Using your relative wealth compared to poorer countries in order to gain access to female bodies that you can’t have at home.

+1

Why can't people adopt?

How many have you adopted?

Can you only speak to this issue if you've adopted a child? Just like you can only speak to labor unions if you've worked in a factory or can only discuss war if you've served in the military?

Or can we not have a discussion about exploiting women and babies for profit without you having to qualify everyones opinion first?