Anonymous wrote:OP still hasn’t told us if they were on their phones individually and not participating in the party or if the phones were out and they were using them while they interacted. These are VERY different situations.

OP only came to troll/vent and leave.

Anonymous wrote:

OP, you should have collected all of the phones from the girls. That is what I would have done. Everyone puts their phones in a basket and gets it back when they leave. I mean c'mon....this is terrible, your poor daughter.


This is a way to make sure these girls never come around again. I’ve never actually heard of phones being collected IRL

That's not the case. My son is in 9th and part of a neighborhood activity for teens and tweens. The mom who runs it collects everyone's phones. He doesn't love that aspect, but since he overall likes the activity, he continues to attend.

What is this "activity"?

Is it like a class, or kids hanging out with friends?

Anonymous wrote:A crafts place for 12 year old sports friends? Sounds really boring, I'd be on my phone, too.

Why, are you 12 years old too? And just because some middle school kids enjoy running around after school doesn’t mean they can’t be interested in other activities. You make sports friends sound like a bunch of low IQ grunting Neanderthals who don’t know how to do anything that doesn’t involve kicking a ball around and when confronted with something different they can only stare at a screen and hope it goes away.

Plenty of kids who don’t care about sports have gone to sports birthday parties and participated and had a good time. People, stop making excuses for poor manners and ignorance.

Well, it’s their party and their experience. If this is how they want to spend their time for a couple hours I’m okay with that. A party is a special experience. I’m not going to place the phone usage of other people’s kids. It is sad though.

I think the more people there are for an activity, the more likely it is that they will lose focus on the activity itself. A craft party sounds like a lot of fun, but for about 6 people max.

I would have collected the phones honestly. 6th graders are still far too young to act like that. Go be a kid.

OP still hasn’t told us if they were on their phones individually and not participating in the party or if the phones were out and they were using them while they interacted. These are VERY different situations.

OP, we had the same thing happen at my DD’s recent sleepover, when she turned 12. Seven girls total, including her. DH told them to get off their phones twice, once while they were singing Happy Birthday to DD and another when they were outside, after expressing interest in roasting marshmallows over our Solo Stove. They did, but DD has complained multiple times about them being on their phones constantly in other scenarios. She and one other girl are the only two of the group who don’t have phones yet.

They got phones too young and the games and videos they watch are literally designed to be engaging, verging on addictive. It only reinforced our resolve not to get her a phone until at least seventh grade. She does have an AppleWatch, which she uses to text and keep in touch with her friends, and that’s all she needs now.

Anonymous wrote:A crafts place for 12 year old sports friends? Sounds really boring, I'd be on my phone, too.

… crafts are boring? Only if you spend too much time watching TikTok.

Anonymous wrote:Phone jammer

Ha! Don’t recommend that, but would make a great SNL sketch!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cannot believe all these 6th graders have phones. Bad parenting

Do you have a child in pubic middle school? I can think of one kid who doesn't have a phone. K-8 agree they aren't needed.

Yes, two. They are fine. There close friends don’t have phones either

This will be extremely odd at my kids’ school.

I posted my 7th grader had complained he was only kid without a phone. A lot of kids still didn’t have phones in 6th grade. I would guess half? I wanted to be able to reach ds after school if we are running late, ask if he is staying after school, etc.

I agree that kids are generally on phones too much, but at least my own kids are willing to be off for an activity they enjoy. It is not an excuse for the behavior at a party, at which kids should be polite regardless of whether it is actually engaging for them - but it could be that these kids' maturity level is not there yet. FWIW, my one kid could have faked it and been polite in 6th, but my other did not have the maturity yet at that point.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cannot believe all these 6th graders have phones. Bad parenting

Do you have a child in pubic middle school? I can think of one kid who doesn't have a phone. K-8 agree they aren't needed.

Yes, two. They are fine. There close friends don’t have phones either

This will be extremely odd at my kids’ school.

Phone jammer

I wouldn’t collect phones. They are at a very vulnerable age right now, they use a phone as a social crutch, they are awkward, they are trying to figure things out. Our entire society uses phones too much, including adults, kids see it everywhere too.
I’d continue to have the discussions with your child, it’s disappointing she didn’t enjoy her party. Just use this as information about future choices and how you guide your kids. It’s hard, for everyone.