Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would get him therapy. The drugs of today are not the same experimental drugs of our past generation. Fentanyl mixed in so many drugs causing overdoses, and today’s weed causes drug induced psychosis. Get him a therapist maybe an underlying desire to fit in, or depression. Also get him involved in activities and something to look forward to surrounded by like minded peers.

Therapy for what? I have a 17 year old who I know has a couple of beers at parties, because he’s told me so. I assume he has tried pot. He is a happy kid - loves his sport and works really hard at it, has a tight group of friends, is a good son and grandson, drives responsibly, does well in school. He does what teenagers do because it’s fun. It’s also bad for him and dangerous, which he knows full well. He does it anyway, as I did before him and I bet his kids will do in turn.

I am not going to ruin my relationship with him by pathologizing a normal (though risky) life stage. We do as much harm reduction as we can - Uber, Life360, home at a reasonable hour, knowing his friends and their parents - and then we hope and pray.

Exactly this! I think the controlling, over the top parents have no communication with their kids and are actually just clueless. I like that my 17yr old once asked for a ride home from a party he didn’t think anyone was sober to drive. My almost 15yo asked to go on BC pills and I was really proud she asked me.

Many teens experiment in high school and don’t always make the right decisions. And we talk a lot about risks and don’t condone anything. But at the same time we don’t threat, demean, and we aren’t like vultures.

Give them some autonomy before college.

A lot of us just have nerdy strait laced kids that just aren’t interested. It doesn’t mean they are lying to us or not communicating with us.

+1
My kid, while not nerdy, is also not hanging out with kids who do drugs or having sex. It’s just not her crowd. We are in fact very open with each other. As for the mom who is “proud” her 15 year old daughter asked her for BC….I would do everything possible to discourage my 15 yo from having sex.

Of course do a drug test.

Anonymous wrote:If 16 or older probably nothing. If younger we’d have a discussion about why and probably punishment.

Now, if they drink alcohol I’d be furious.

Why? I'm the other way around.

If 16 or older probably nothing. If younger we’d have a discussion about why and probably punishment.

Now, if they drink alcohol I’d be furious.

It depends. My freshman has a friend who started vaping pot in MS. That kid has made some poor choices and been caught multiple times. That kid I would test.

In some ways I'm more concerned about pot than I am alcohol because of how incredibly easy it is to hide these days. Betwee vaping and edibles (and the "legal" options like Delta 8), these kids aren't really rolling joints or smoking from bongs (or homemade soda can bongs like we made in high school). They can use almost anytime/anywhere without detection and for some kids that is very seductive.

I realize that some people have life long relationships with pot that they find healthy and part of their lifestyle. To those I say Godspeed. But for kids, kids whose brains are still developing and who are in such a crucial time of social and emotional growth, I believe the risk of addiction (some argue it's not physically addictive, but if it's psychologically addictive is there really a difference?) is great and it's important to keep an eye on. Especially in these post-covid times when mental health issues are at an all time high (pun unintended).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would get him therapy. The drugs of today are not the same experimental drugs of our past generation. Fentanyl mixed in so many drugs causing overdoses, and today’s weed causes drug induced psychosis. Get him a therapist maybe an underlying desire to fit in, or depression. Also get him involved in activities and something to look forward to surrounded by like minded peers.

Therapy for what? I have a 17 year old who I know has a couple of beers at parties, because he’s told me so. I assume he has tried pot. He is a happy kid - loves his sport and works really hard at it, has a tight group of friends, is a good son and grandson, drives responsibly, does well in school. He does what teenagers do because it’s fun. It’s also bad for him and dangerous, which he knows full well. He does it anyway, as I did before him and I bet his kids will do in turn.

I am not going to ruin my relationship with him by pathologizing a normal (though risky) life stage. We do as much harm reduction as we can - Uber, Life360, home at a reasonable hour, knowing his friends and their parents - and then we hope and pray.

It depends.

Kids who smoke pot do it at home alone playing video games. Would you be okay if your kid drank alone ? Probably not.

Actually, kids smoke pot with their friends in the woods after school when you think they are just walking home.

Pot is super bad for teen brains. Alcohol is bad, and alcohol and cars is deadly. And if you think that it’s only the jock partiers who are drinking, or the loners in their bedrooms who are smoking, you have your head up your butt.

If you think it isn’t a big deal, just read more about the effect in their brain.

https://americanaddictioncenters.org/marijuana-rehab/effects-of-marijuana-on-teenage-brain

“THC and other chemicals bind to the endocannabinoid receptors, and the resultant dysregulation of this neurotransmitter system could potentially result in long-term neurodevelopmental changes.8 Studies exploring the long-term effects of adolescent marijuana use on cognition, brain structure, and brain functioning compared to adults, suggest that the adolescent brain is far more sensitive to the chemicals in marijuana than the adult brain.8 Additionally, research indicates that chronic marijuana use during adolescence can lead to a loss of IQ that isn’t recovered even if the individual stops marijuana use in adulthood.7“

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would get him therapy. The drugs of today are not the same experimental drugs of our past generation. Fentanyl mixed in so many drugs causing overdoses, and today’s weed causes drug induced psychosis. Get him a therapist maybe an underlying desire to fit in, or depression. Also get him involved in activities and something to look forward to surrounded by like minded peers.

Therapy for what? I have a 17 year old who I know has a couple of beers at parties, because he’s told me so. I assume he has tried pot. He is a happy kid - loves his sport and works really hard at it, has a tight group of friends, is a good son and grandson, drives responsibly, does well in school. He does what teenagers do because it’s fun. It’s also bad for him and dangerous, which he knows full well. He does it anyway, as I did before him and I bet his kids will do in turn.

I am not going to ruin my relationship with him by pathologizing a normal (though risky) life stage. We do as much harm reduction as we can - Uber, Life360, home at a reasonable hour, knowing his friends and their parents - and then we hope and pray.

+1

+2

They go high, I’ll go low. I can get as low and you want me to, anything flies. Drugs ruin lives.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would get him therapy. The drugs of today are not the same experimental drugs of our past generation. Fentanyl mixed in so many drugs causing overdoses, and today’s weed causes drug induced psychosis. Get him a therapist maybe an underlying desire to fit in, or depression. Also get him involved in activities and something to look forward to surrounded by like minded peers.

Therapy for what? I have a 17 year old who I know has a couple of beers at parties, because he’s told me so. I assume he has tried pot. He is a happy kid - loves his sport and works really hard at it, has a tight group of friends, is a good son and grandson, drives responsibly, does well in school. He does what teenagers do because it’s fun. It’s also bad for him and dangerous, which he knows full well. He does it anyway, as I did before him and I bet his kids will do in turn.

I am not going to ruin my relationship with him by pathologizing a normal (though risky) life stage. We do as much harm reduction as we can - Uber, Life360, home at a reasonable hour, knowing his friends and their parents - and then we hope and pray.

Exactly this! I think the controlling, over the top parents have no communication with their kids and are actually just clueless. I like that my 17yr old once asked for a ride home from a party he didn’t think anyone was sober to drive. My almost 15yo asked to go on BC pills and I was really proud she asked me.

Many teens experiment in high school and don’t always make the right decisions. And we talk a lot about risks and don’t condone anything. But at the same time we don’t threat, demean, and we aren’t like vultures.

Give them some autonomy before college.

A lot of us just have nerdy strait laced kids that just aren’t interested. It doesn’t mean they are lying to us or not communicating with us.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I drug tested him on and off for a year or so. He’s in college now and I know he’s drinking and smoking cigarettes there. I made it clear that if I suspected anything else, I would drug test him and take away his phone, car insurance, etc.

I would 100% want my kid smoking weed before cigarettes. Actually would prefer edibles and save their lungs, but oh well.

You threatening an adult off at college is weird.

My brother is an ER doc and has told me about the kids coming into the ER where he works high as a kite having psychotic episodes. One college kid broke tons of bones after jumping from a third story window. Weed now is dangerous.

You threatening an adult off at college is weird.

That adult is free to pay their own tuition, rent, cell phone, car, car insurance, etc. to avoid the weirdness.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would get him therapy. The drugs of today are not the same experimental drugs of our past generation. Fentanyl mixed in so many drugs causing overdoses, and today’s weed causes drug induced psychosis. Get him a therapist maybe an underlying desire to fit in, or depression. Also get him involved in activities and something to look forward to surrounded by like minded peers.

Therapy for what? I have a 17 year old who I know has a couple of beers at parties, because he’s told me so. I assume he has tried pot. He is a happy kid - loves his sport and works really hard at it, has a tight group of friends, is a good son and grandson, drives responsibly, does well in school. He does what teenagers do because it’s fun. It’s also bad for him and dangerous, which he knows full well. He does it anyway, as I did before him and I bet his kids will do in turn.

I am not going to ruin my relationship with him by pathologizing a normal (though risky) life stage. We do as much harm reduction as we can - Uber, Life360, home at a reasonable hour, knowing his friends and their parents - and then we hope and pray.

Exactly this! I think the controlling, over the top parents have no communication with their kids and are actually just clueless. I like that my 17yr old once asked for a ride home from a party he didn’t think anyone was sober to drive. My almost 15yo asked to go on BC pills and I was really proud she asked me.

Many teens experiment in high school and don’t always make the right decisions. And we talk a lot about risks and don’t condone anything. But at the same time we don’t threat, demean, and we aren’t like vultures.

Give them some autonomy before college.

FFS get your 17 yo an Uber account grandma.

Anonymous wrote:Beat the shit out of him and he knows it. Ridicule him, call him the loser that he is. Only complete losers do drugs.

True

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would get him therapy. The drugs of today are not the same experimental drugs of our past generation. Fentanyl mixed in so many drugs causing overdoses, and today’s weed causes drug induced psychosis. Get him a therapist maybe an underlying desire to fit in, or depression. Also get him involved in activities and something to look forward to surrounded by like minded peers.

Therapy for what? I have a 17 year old who I know has a couple of beers at parties, because he’s told me so. I assume he has tried pot. He is a happy kid - loves his sport and works really hard at it, has a tight group of friends, is a good son and grandson, drives responsibly, does well in school. He does what teenagers do because it’s fun. It’s also bad for him and dangerous, which he knows full well. He does it anyway, as I did before him and I bet his kids will do in turn.

I am not going to ruin my relationship with him by pathologizing a normal (though risky) life stage. We do as much harm reduction as we can - Uber, Life360, home at a reasonable hour, knowing his friends and their parents - and then we hope and pray.

It depends.

Kids who smoke pot do it at home alone playing video games. Would you be okay if your kid drank alone ? Probably not.