The parents are so often the issue in kids’ sports. My swimmer is going to one of this weekend’s meets and they have winter champs cuts, etc., so this is a chill meet for them to do some off events. They are very excited for the meet though because they have some teammates who are super close to making winter champs for the first time and want them to get to go and get the bag tags, and swag, and the whole champs meet experience. And my kid is not some outlier, their teammates are genuinely supportive of each other. The parents on the other hand….complaining to coaches, gossiping about kids and telling their kid they need to try and beat X teammate, it’s exhausting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So we’re clear, you two most recent PPs are making fun of a kid for being slow at swimming. At least, that’s what you think you’re doing: adults making fun of kids.

Nope, I’m giving it right back to the parent being unnecessarily critical of fast swimmers who are goal-oriented and care about things like champs cuts. My kid has plenty of teammates who don’t make champs cuts but you know what their parents don’t do, talk sh!t about the kids making cuts to make themselves feel better about their kid’s performance. The first poster was actually the adult making fun of kids.

Well, all the rest of us with kids who are in the Slower than B category saw it too. And yes, you were mocking our kids.

+1. Whether you meant to or not, you ended up slamming those of us reading along who have kids that are B swimmers. It’s particularly mean-spirited when you consider even our B swimmers can be dedicated and training 4-5 days a week and still just can’t quite make cuts. Have some situational awareness.

Like the situational awareness the poster that started all of this had? If you’re going to denigrate my kid for being talented and dedicated to a sport they love, and act like they’re doing too much because it’s not the Olympics, I’m going to respond to that. I wasn’t making fun of slower kids, I was specifically addressing the poster who seemed to be mocking fast kids out of a place of insecurity or jealousy, and yeah, that is not a good look.

Everything after seemed to be = projection.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So we’re clear, you two most recent PPs are making fun of a kid for being slow at swimming. At least, that’s what you think you’re doing: adults making fun of kids.

Nope, I’m giving it right back to the parent being unnecessarily critical of fast swimmers who are goal-oriented and care about things like champs cuts. My kid has plenty of teammates who don’t make champs cuts but you know what their parents don’t do, talk sh!t about the kids making cuts to make themselves feel better about their kid’s performance. The first poster was actually the adult making fun of kids.

Well, all the rest of us with kids who are in the Slower than B category saw it too. And yes, you were mocking our kids.

+1. Whether you meant to or not, you ended up slamming those of us reading along who have kids that are B swimmers. It’s particularly mean-spirited when you consider even our B swimmers can be dedicated and training 4-5 days a week and still just can’t quite make cuts. Have some situational awareness.

Like the situational awareness the poster that started all of this had? If you’re going to denigrate my kid for being talented and dedicated to a sport they love, and act like they’re doing too much because it’s not the Olympics, I’m going to respond to that. I wasn’t making fun of slower kids, I was specifically addressing the poster who seemed to be mocking fast kids out of a place of insecurity or jealousy, and yeah, that is not a good look.

My kid likes to swim and improve. They love their club and meets because of the social nature of it. They dance and cheer.

As long as they love it, I could care less if they are slower than B or making the Olympics. If they want to be super competitive or not, makes no difference.

I will let them dictate it, because they are happy and enjoying themselves. I am just the chauffer.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So we’re clear, you two most recent PPs are making fun of a kid for being slow at swimming. At least, that’s what you think you’re doing: adults making fun of kids.

Nope, I’m giving it right back to the parent being unnecessarily critical of fast swimmers who are goal-oriented and care about things like champs cuts. My kid has plenty of teammates who don’t make champs cuts but you know what their parents don’t do, talk sh!t about the kids making cuts to make themselves feel better about their kid’s performance. The first poster was actually the adult making fun of kids.

Well, all the rest of us with kids who are in the Slower than B category saw it too. And yes, you were mocking our kids.

+1. Whether you meant to or not, you ended up slamming those of us reading along who have kids that are B swimmers. It’s particularly mean-spirited when you consider even our B swimmers can be dedicated and training 4-5 days a week and still just can’t quite make cuts. Have some situational awareness.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The parent making the Olympic comment and telling everyone to relax was making fun of driven/competitive kids. They were also going after the parent.

I have several kids that swim competitively. I have one of those crazy kids who is obsessed with swimming. People are going to think I push, but believe me, I do not. My other kids will skip practice or do other things. MY competitive kid gets angry when I make them skip.

If there is a family where all the kids are super competitive I would suspect the parents are pushing it. It would not be normal to have all kids have the same passion.

I agree. One family I knew when my kids were younger would reward their kids when they got best times and would take away electronics if they added. They also paid a lot of money for private lessons and trainers when the kids were already in the pool 5 or 6 days a week. It seemed beyond crazy to me and I was not sure if the kids even liked to swim.

That’s insanity!

Anonymous wrote:It’s not disdain for kids. It’s disdain for hyper competitive attitudes being exhibited and the manufactured false sense of urgency associated with a single meet.

That post is word salad that actually boils down to disdain for fast kids that are focused on the competitive side of swimming.

It’s not disdain for kids. It’s disdain for hyper competitive attitudes being exhibited and the manufactured false sense of urgency associated with a single meet.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So we’re clear, you two most recent PPs are making fun of a kid for being slow at swimming. At least, that’s what you think you’re doing: adults making fun of kids.

Nope, I’m giving it right back to the parent being unnecessarily critical of fast swimmers who are goal-oriented and care about things like champs cuts. My kid has plenty of teammates who don’t make champs cuts but you know what their parents don’t do, talk sh!t about the kids making cuts to make themselves feel better about their kid’s performance. The first poster was actually the adult making fun of kids.

Well, all the rest of us with kids who are in the Slower than B category saw it too. And yes, you were mocking our kids.

No I didn’t say anything about the kids, I called out the parent, but that poster was absolutely mocking mine for caring about cuts.

If you’re either the 14:58 or 19:08 PPs, you *literally* referenced the slow times of PP’s children. If you’re not one of those PPs, my post wasn’t directed at you, so MYOFB.

The Olympics comment was snarky and uncalled for - but it’s one thing to direct that at a kid at the top of the heap. Mocking the slower ones is all kinds of garbage.

Mocking kids regardless of whether they are fast or slow is unacceptable. It’s garbage to suggest mocking a fast kid is somehow acceptable because they are better. Quite frankly it demonstrates that your disdain for the faster kid is based on your feelings about your kid’s ability, which is a you problem that you should work on.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So we’re clear, you two most recent PPs are making fun of a kid for being slow at swimming. At least, that’s what you think you’re doing: adults making fun of kids.

Nope, I’m giving it right back to the parent being unnecessarily critical of fast swimmers who are goal-oriented and care about things like champs cuts. My kid has plenty of teammates who don’t make champs cuts but you know what their parents don’t do, talk sh!t about the kids making cuts to make themselves feel better about their kid’s performance. The first poster was actually the adult making fun of kids.

Well, all the rest of us with kids who are in the Slower than B category saw it too. And yes, you were mocking our kids.

No I didn’t say anything about the kids, I called out the parent, but that poster was absolutely mocking mine for caring about cuts.

If you’re either the 14:58 or 19:08 PPs, you *literally* referenced the slow times of PP’s children. If you’re not one of those PPs, my post wasn’t directed at you, so MYOFB.

The Olympics comment was snarky and uncalled for - but it’s one thing to direct that at a kid at the top of the heap. Mocking the slower ones is all kinds of garbage.

So mocking successful kids is okay? WTH people. How about this, let's not make fun of kids. Period. There I fixed it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So we’re clear, you two most recent PPs are making fun of a kid for being slow at swimming. At least, that’s what you think you’re doing: adults making fun of kids.

Nope, I’m giving it right back to the parent being unnecessarily critical of fast swimmers who are goal-oriented and care about things like champs cuts. My kid has plenty of teammates who don’t make champs cuts but you know what their parents don’t do, talk sh!t about the kids making cuts to make themselves feel better about their kid’s performance. The first poster was actually the adult making fun of kids.

Well, all the rest of us with kids who are in the Slower than B category saw it too. And yes, you were mocking our kids.

No I didn’t say anything about the kids, I called out the parent, but that poster was absolutely mocking mine for caring about cuts.

If you’re either the 14:58 or 19:08 PPs, you *literally* referenced the slow times of PP’s children. If you’re not one of those PPs, my post wasn’t directed at you, so MYOFB.

The Olympics comment was snarky and uncalled for - but it’s one thing to direct that at a kid at the top of the heap. Mocking the slower ones is all kinds of garbage.

I don't think that the *CRAZY* is limited to swim. I know families that take their mediocre athlete and expect greatness - private coaching, travel teams, clinics, etc. And their kid has limited interest in the sport.

Or a great athlete that gets punished when they don't perform or want a break, or God forbid they want to add something fun into their lives.

Or a kid that loves a sport and is not great at it (but HAPPY) and the parent is constantly disappointed in them and says things - like I am wasting my team being here.

Honestly a lot of these parents would be better off dropping their kids off at games/meets/etc and going out with friends or developing hobbies. They are not helping their kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The parent making the Olympic comment and telling everyone to relax was making fun of driven/competitive kids. They were also going after the parent.

I have several kids that swim competitively. I have one of those crazy kids who is obsessed with swimming. People are going to think I push, but believe me, I do not. My other kids will skip practice or do other things. MY competitive kid gets angry when I make them skip.

If there is a family where all the kids are super competitive I would suspect the parents are pushing it. It would not be normal to have all kids have the same passion.

I agree. One family I knew when my kids were younger would reward their kids when they got best times and would take away electronics if they added. They also paid a lot of money for private lessons and trainers when the kids were already in the pool 5 or 6 days a week. It seemed beyond crazy to me and I was not sure if the kids even liked to swim.

This is crazy. Punishing kids for adding time is awful. I also think it’s a recipe for burnout and/or an overuse injury to be practicing 5-6 days a week with regular private training and lessons on top of that.

There's a lot of crazy in this thread.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The parent making the Olympic comment and telling everyone to relax was making fun of driven/competitive kids. They were also going after the parent.

I have several kids that swim competitively. I have one of those crazy kids who is obsessed with swimming. People are going to think I push, but believe me, I do not. My other kids will skip practice or do other things. MY competitive kid gets angry when I make them skip.

If there is a family where all the kids are super competitive I would suspect the parents are pushing it. It would not be normal to have all kids have the same passion.

I agree. One family I knew when my kids were younger would reward their kids when they got best times and would take away electronics if they added. They also paid a lot of money for private lessons and trainers when the kids were already in the pool 5 or 6 days a week. It seemed beyond crazy to me and I was not sure if the kids even liked to swim.

This is crazy. Punishing kids for adding time is awful. I also think it’s a recipe for burnout and/or an overuse injury to be practicing 5-6 days a week with regular private training and lessons on top of that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The parent making the Olympic comment and telling everyone to relax was making fun of driven/competitive kids. They were also going after the parent.

I have several kids that swim competitively. I have one of those crazy kids who is obsessed with swimming. People are going to think I push, but believe me, I do not. My other kids will skip practice or do other things. MY competitive kid gets angry when I make them skip.

If there is a family where all the kids are super competitive I would suspect the parents are pushing it. It would not be normal to have all kids have the same passion.

I agree. One family I knew when my kids were younger would reward their kids when they got best times and would take away electronics if they added. They also paid a lot of money for private lessons and trainers when the kids were already in the pool 5 or 6 days a week. It seemed beyond crazy to me and I was not sure if the kids even liked to swim.

We have a family on our summer team that swims club. Their kids are really good and they act like it is all natural talent. Come to find out that they have both of the kids getting lots of private coaching (they kind of wigged when that came out) at a VERY young age, they are pushing their club to put their (at the time) 12 year old into the top swim group of the club, and they were pushing the kids to break records for summer so hard that the younger one was DQing on basic stuff and not even realizing it (false start, wrong strokes) and the dad FLIPPED out on deck throwing stuff on the ground.

They act super chill, or tried. They are far from chill. It is crazy. Sorry I have a teen swimming and you would have to be Olympic level to have an 11-12 in the top performing group in any club. There is no way that they could keep up or it would be developmentally appropriate.

I hope that both their kids keep it up, because it is so obvious that the parents are living through their kids' success and pushing them very hard.