Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I met my husband when I was 25 and he was 36. So I’d say those ages are unproblematic.

Twenty years later, I hardly feel the age difference at all.

Almost the same here. Met at 26/37, married at 29/40. We're now 51/62. He has longevity and health in his family. I do not. He may outlive me.

But, that's not the norm. Most men don't age well.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think 10 years is an issue at all.

Wait till you are 60 and he's 70.

Most men don't age well into their 70s. The average life span for a male in the US is 77.8 years. You would be 68 when he dies. That's still pretty young.

Anonymous wrote:I met my husband when I was 25 and he was 36. So I’d say those ages are unproblematic.

Twenty years later, I hardly feel the age difference at all.

Almost the same here. Met at 26/37, married at 29/40. We're now 51/62. He has longevity and health in his family. I do not. He may outlive me.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think 10 years is an issue at all.

It would be “problematic” (such a weasel word) for me to marry a 20yo AU student in my 40s, but they’re fun to sleep with.

I don’t think 10 years is an issue at all.

Anonymous wrote:I met my husband when I was 25 and he was 36. So I’d say those ages are unproblematic.

Twenty years later, I hardly feel the age difference at all.

To me that would be too big. Lets see how you feel when he is 70!

My grandparents had about a 20 year age difference and my grandfather died in his 80s, plus they had 8 children.

My grandmother never had to take care of an old man. My grandfather was active and a working physician until the last day of his life. He was never sick or incapacitated. She never had to be a nurse or purse. He went to work one day and died in his sleep. But he was obsessively vigilant about his health and his diet.

So sometimes these things shake out differently.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH is 24 years older. We are happy together now but I do worry what happens when he’s too old.

He's too old now

He’s 60, but keeps an amazing shape. Still very handsome and sexy. But sometimes when he’s back from long travel, the tiredness does show his age. I’m more worried in about 10-20 years. But who knows what life will be? I’m just trying to enjoy the moment

Babe you're not fooling anyone but yourself. 60 is an old man. He's technically a senior citizen and could be your daddy. He's old it's only downhill from here

This is what isn’t thought about. When PP is an active and healthy 50-60 something, she won’t be able to be active and have fun like her DH is now. She’ll be trapped at home caretaking her old elderly DH, and the physical and mental tole that takes will age her faster than her DH is aging. Then when she’s a widow at 60, she’ll be tired and worn out. I don’t say this to be mean to PP, I’ve seen it play out and these women don’t just bounce back.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I met my husband when I was 25 and he was 36. So I’d say those ages are unproblematic.

Twenty years later, I hardly feel the age difference at all.

My auntie is in her 60s and her boyfriend whom she won't marry is in his 40s. They've been together 15 yrs.

Usually it's the man that's older when the woman needs to be dependent on the man.

I’m not sure why that’s your response to my post but DH and I have nearly identical salaries.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH is 24 years older. We are happy together now but I do worry what happens when he’s too old.

He's too old now

He’s 60, but keeps an amazing shape. Still very handsome and sexy. But sometimes when he’s back from long travel, the tiredness does show his age. I’m more worried in about 10-20 years. But who knows what life will be? I’m just trying to enjoy the moment

Babe you're not fooling anyone but yourself. 60 is an old man. He's technically a senior citizen and could be your daddy. He's old it's only downhill from here

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom and her partner have only a 6-year age gap, but the difference between 74 and 80 feels huge. Mainly because they also have a financial gap and she's going to have to start supporting him, so she can't retire.

Working at 74? wowza

Yup. When you are with a partner who has little savings and low earning potential, he can't work forever and the chickens come home to roost financially. I tried so many times to tell her this is how it would shake out, but she didn't want to hear it. She's an adult and she's making her own choices. I don't know what will happen when she can't work anymore and runs out of money. I really feel like this man is bleeding her dry.

Anonymous wrote:My mom and her partner have only a 6-year age gap, but the difference between 74 and 80 feels huge. Mainly because they also have a financial gap and she's going to have to start supporting him, so she can't retire.

Working at 74? wowza

I’d say early twenties then 50s - 80. There can be a huge difference in energy levels and health between 50 - 60, 60-70 and 70-80

According to research age gaps of 10+ years have much higher rates of divorce

My mom and her partner have only a 6-year age gap, but the difference between 74 and 80 feels huge. Mainly because they also have a financial gap and she's going to have to start supporting him, so she can't retire.