I take my phone with me into the bathroom all the time. Don’t you guys want entertainment while you’re doing all your boring things?

Sheesh. I’m a SAHM since Covid and in the past two years have tried to de-frump myself. I groom more, dress better, and bought myself underwear that wasn’t junky. I hope DH isn’t suspicious… I’m doing it for him! It helps me feel more like a woman too which helps my waning libido.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Starts working out more, buying new clothes generally putting more effort into her appearance (maybe a new haircut, wears perfume more, new underwear)

Showers shortly after getting home

Is more defensive or short with you over really mundane things

Hiding or guarding her phone

Lol - I’ve had a couple cycles of gaining a little weight and then I go nuts working out to get it off, which inevitably leads to weight loss, more confidence, new clothes, dressing up bc I know I look good again etc. and then I want to have more sex w DH bc I feel better about myself. I’ve never had, nor ever considered, an affair.

OP asked for possible signs. These are possible signs. No one is suggesting that if you buy new clothes you're boinking someone else. It's simply a list of things that you can look for if you're suspecting and take the totality of incidents and changes to look at the issue objectively. Honestly - this is your contribution? Read the room.

Anonymous wrote:Starts working out more, buying new clothes generally putting more effort into her appearance (maybe a new haircut, wears perfume more, new underwear)

Showers shortly after getting home

Is more defensive or short with you over really mundane things

Hiding or guarding her phone

Lol - I’ve had a couple cycles of gaining a little weight and then I go nuts working out to get it off, which inevitably leads to weight loss, more confidence, new clothes, dressing up bc I know I look good again etc. and then I want to have more sex w DH bc I feel better about myself. I’ve never had, nor ever considered, an affair.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The number one thing nowadays will ALWAYS be the phone. More guarded, new passcode, turning over when setting it down, taking into the bathroom - basically glued. Will not turn over even for inocuous things without hard shoulder surfing to make sure you're not creeping in other areas.

So - just ask for the phone - and see the fireworks.

Most people just get a burner phone.

Maybe - if they're pros or at it for a while, but first affair and just getting into it they are not going to be that clever.

Anonymous wrote:The number one thing nowadays will ALWAYS be the phone. More guarded, new passcode, turning over when setting it down, taking into the bathroom - basically glued. Will not turn over even for inocuous things without hard shoulder surfing to make sure you're not creeping in other areas.

So - just ask for the phone - and see the fireworks.

Most people just get a burner phone.

Things in general (outside of phone):

Taking more care at looks - new haircut, clothes, "working out" all of the sudden
Suddenly has unaccounted time - longer getting home from work, needs to work late, needs to all of the sudden work weekend or nights, suddenly work needs them to go on a trip
Becomes highly critical and annoyed at everything - and vocal about it
May bring up unhappiness in general - about "life", "choices", "never wanted to get married", "need to find themselves" - looks like midlife or existential crisis
Becomes hostile and/or emotional and sudden outbursts requiring need to "get away for a few hours"
Needs "me" time - a lot of it - that doesn't include you or the kids

The number one thing nowadays will ALWAYS be the phone. More guarded, new passcode, turning over when setting it down, taking into the bathroom - basically glued. Will not turn over even for inocuous things without hard shoulder surfing to make sure you're not creeping in other areas.

So - just ask for the phone - and see the fireworks.

My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home.

-Rodney Dangerfield

Anonymous wrote:Are women better at hiding their tracks or is it that men are less suspicious and/or in denial?

Women usually don’t cheat for sex. They cheat because something is missing (or they feel like something is missing), and/or as an exit affair.

So you have a situation where 1) the husband isn’t paying attention (what’s usually “missing” from the relationship), and/or 2) she’s gearing up to leave (thus very aware of any signals she is giving off).

She's got bruises on the inside of her mouth. Try to inspect when she's asleep

Her AP’s wife shows up at your house.

Anonymous wrote:Are women better at hiding their tracks or is it that men are less suspicious and/or in denial?

Women are way better at hiding their tracks, once mine knew I was onto her she did a CIA level sanitization of phones, pads and computers. There were only faint traces before the discovery

Are women better at hiding their tracks or is it that men are less suspicious and/or in denial?

A friend of mine got home from a trip one day early to surprise his wife and she surprised him with a visitor. That was a pretty clear sign. I remember this happening to a professional baseball player a number of years ago. He had been traded but they hadn’t moved but he came home to surprise her.