Learn from me. Go through her phone and make sure she’s ok. I thought my daughter was the same and a happy introvert but she was depressed and lonely and refusing social contact bc she didn’t think she was wanted. Spent her life online in eating disorder and self harm discord groups, it was bad bad bad. The online communities she spent time in were toxic.

She’s now good and very social.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can understand wanting downtime away from peers on weeknights and weekends, but to not even have a friend you want to celebrate your birthday with?? Seems off to me…

+1000

This is not normal for teen development.

I would have loved it if there was no pressure to “celebrate” my birthday when I was a teen. I would have loved to spend the day with my family. I also would have loved if being an introvert was more accepted when I was younger. I’m pretty normal.

One of my kids is like this but I think my big question is what are you going to do about it if you are concerned? If she has reasonable social skills and just wants quiet down time can you force her to find a friend? How would you even do that? I think if she is happy that is adequate.

If you have a specific concern like maybe she has depression or poor social skills or social anxiety that is different but it doesn’t really sound like it to me.

My kid is introverted and has friends she sees occasionally, is on a sports teams, and is very close with our family including siblings. That’s adequate for her. She prefers to do homework or reads a book during lunch and I’m totally fine with that if it works for her.

Anonymous wrote:Susan Cain's book "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Won't Stop Talking" will be super-reassuring. Your DD is lucky to have you!

Signed,
A grown-up introvert

This is a great book! I was just recommending it to my DD so she can understand more about her introverted self - not alone in this!