If already had 3 false stats, have DC get a job- anything they can get. They can look at it as a break from the start/stop they had been on with colleges. If they can show up each day, they can maybe rebuild some confidence in themselves. Maybe they find they like working better than classes. Maybe they find classes weren’t so bad. If they start/stop jobs though, take deep breath and go read posts from other parents on how they have approached kids that live at home but do not want to go to college and don’t want to get a job, which is next part of parenting puzzle.

Anonymous wrote:Why do so many American parents find it difficult to accept most people simply are not cut out for a university education?

In Europe, we all accept the reality only a small percentage of the population are actually meant to attend university.

There are plenty of other careers for those who are not headed to university.

Americans have a weird hang-up about college. Your child not finishing is not the end of the world, but many here pretend it is.

Europe is inexpensive and life is pleasant enough if you don’t go to college. That’s not the case in the US. It’s hard for even college graduates to afford things.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your child had various “false starts” and seemed very under engaged in college, at what point did you pull the plug and say we’re done for now, time to work and revisit later? Thanks.

I'll make sure kid has mental health support and there is no ADHD or anxiety etc making it difficult for him.

I'll also make sure that he is getting proper academic support from college and is enrolled in major suitable to his strengths.

I'll also encourage mire socialization, joining extracurriculars, finding mentors, attending office hours and finding a steady girlfriend to get him involved in college life.

Op here. Yes all of the above part of the picture and being treated and supported including accommodations, therapy, tutoring supports.

If the false starts were while he was being supported I think it’s time for them to get a job and revisit college idea later

Anonymous wrote:He might be stupid or lazy. No Shame in that.

OP has a daughter but you'd know that if you bothered to read the thread.

Can they do a diploma of some sort? This is the time for college. All their peers are there, and their life level responsibilities are the lowest they'll ever be.

Why not get a coach to help?

He might be stupid or lazy. No Shame in that.

Anonymous wrote:You sound like you are talking about a toddler.

What an ignorant and unhelpful comment, troll-PP.

Despite the vulgarity of your response, you have somehow managed to stumble upon a recurrent theme in this sub-forum:

- adult children who fail to mature as past generations generally did.

Why exactly is that?

You sound like you are talking about a toddler.