Anonymous wrote:I think it’s weird too. Not everyone needs to express good wishes on social media. If you really have good wishes, then when you see or talk to them, say so! If you don’t see or talk to friends often enough, then that’s the real problem. Friendships & community are important to maintain.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My college roommate is Jewish. Always wishes me happiness on a Christian holiday. I’m not offended. What’s the difference?

This is OP - and I am not "offended," I just find it a little weird. I think the difference is that presumably your college roommate knows you well enough to know if wishing you happiness on a Christian holiday is appropriate. These are generic "oh, you're Jewish, well here's what I am going to presume about what to say to you without having any personal knowledge about how you practice" sorts of things. It's just weird! I don't care enough to say anything to the people who are making the posts - I do care enough to say here that I find it odd and a little off!

Anonymous wrote:I think it's weird.

Is it weird to order a high holiday meal from Call Your Mother if you aren't Jewish? They look sooo good.

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s weird too. Not everyone needs to express good wishes on social media. If you really have good wishes, then when you see or talk to them, say so! If you don’t see or talk to friends often enough, then that’s the real problem. Friendships & community are important to maintain.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a few fairly religious Jewish friends who regularly ask folks to share the list of high holidays so people don’t schedule important meetings in those days. I think tagging people is a bit much on holiday good wishes but tbf I almost never tag people and rarely post on social media at all so my normalcy calibration might be off. I do see your point about making assumptions about people’s religion, though. If any of these are close friends you can maybe mention it to them another time that it feels odd to be wished greetings as part of a blanket statement without any personal calibration? If acquaintances, I would probably mute them; maybe if their posts get little enough engagement they’ll stop?

I am not close enough with either of them to say anything - and honestly I'm not even sure what I'd say. I don't have an argument for NOT doing this - it just feels off to me. There's nothing I can point to and say, "you shouldn't do this and here's why" - I just feel like it's a weird thing to have non-Jews posting about Jewish holidays, and presuming to share some expertise.

The thing my friend shred about the holidays was originally put up by someone who went to a Lutheran theology school (I see in his profile) then got shared something like 4,000 times. It's not objectionable in content - it just feels weird for someone who is a Christian to be holding himself up as an expert in how to be considerate to the Jews around their holidays (which obviously we can't presume anyone is already familiar with since of course Jews are other and exotic). It feels weird is all!

Oh yeah, I get this. I am generally exhausted by people who position themselves as experts on "being inclusive" or whatever on social media. It's one thing for someone to speak to their own identity and experience -- I'd have no issue with a Jewish person saying "hey as a PSA, these are the high holy dates this year and here's some info so you don't go wishing someone a happy day of atonement!" And if someone shared that, all the better.

But when you have people who are NOT of a certain identity lecturing others on how to be tolerant and inclusive of that identity -- it just comes off as self-promotional. Like when straight people lecture about how to be inclusive of LGBTQA+ people, or when white people lecture each other about racism. Share/promote something from a person of that identity? Yes, for sure. Jump on your soap box to pontificate on how to be a good liberal? Nope, it's annoying.

I basically stopped going on Facebook back in 2018 or so for this reason -- so many likeminded people lecturing each other on how to be progressive, it got really tiresome.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First, want to include that I am Jewish, born and raised.

OP's post is the perfect example of "damned-if-you-do / damned-if-you-don't."

+1

Offense will be taken, dammit.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First, want to include that I am Jewish, born and raised.

OP's post is the perfect example of "damned-if-you-do / damned-if-you-don't" Your friends, non-Jewish or Jewish, took the time to express good wishes to you. If you are questioning their motives than perhaps you should also question your definition of friendship.

OP, from your explanation it looks like your non-Jewish friends even took the time to research and learn the most proper ways to express their good wishes for the high holy days. If you ask me, that is wonderful and appreciated.

Agreed.

.

+2. It's like people don't know how to live these days. How hard is it to accept well wishes even if you don't need them? If you want the person to stop sending them to you, just say "thank you, but I actually don't celebrate this this"? We live in a society people.

+100 It is hard to know what to say anymore. People seem to be looking for ways to be offended. It is sad this is where we all are now.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My college roommate is Jewish. Always wishes me happiness on a Christian holiday. I’m not offended. What’s the difference?

This is OP - and I am not "offended," I just find it a little weird. I think the difference is that presumably your college roommate knows you well enough to know if wishing you happiness on a Christian holiday is appropriate. These are generic "oh, you're Jewish, well here's what I am going to presume about what to say to you without having any personal knowledge about how you practice" sorts of things. It's just weird! I don't care enough to say anything to the people who are making the posts - I do care enough to say here that I find it odd and a little off!

Dp. I know which of my Jewish friends are religious, cultural or High Holy Days Jewish. One friend told me I knew more about Jewish culture than she does (it was a joke) because I know the word "Safta" and other Hebrew words. I'm a "Christmas and Easter" Catholic, for reference.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My college roommate is Jewish. Always wishes me happiness on a Christian holiday. I’m not offended. What’s the difference?

This is OP - and I am not "offended," I just find it a little weird. I think the difference is that presumably your college roommate knows you well enough to know if wishing you happiness on a Christian holiday is appropriate. These are generic "oh, you're Jewish, well here's what I am going to presume about what to say to you without having any personal knowledge about how you practice" sorts of things. It's just weird! I don't care enough to say anything to the people who are making the posts - I do care enough to say here that I find it odd and a little off!

Anonymous wrote:First, want to include that I am Jewish, born and raised.

OP's post is the perfect example of "damned-if-you-do / damned-if-you-don't."

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First, want to include that I am Jewish, born and raised.

OP's post is the perfect example of "damned-if-you-do / damned-if-you-don't" Your friends, non-Jewish or Jewish, took the time to express good wishes to you. If you are questioning their motives than perhaps you should also question your definition of friendship.

OP, from your explanation it looks like your non-Jewish friends even took the time to research and learn the most proper ways to express their good wishes for the high holy days. If you ask me, that is wonderful and appreciated.

Agreed.

.

+2. It's like people don't know how to live these days. How hard is it to accept well wishes even if you don't need them? If you want the person to stop sending them to you, just say "thank you, but I actually don't celebrate this this"? We live in a society people.

+100 It is hard to know what to say anymore. People seem to be looking for ways to be offended. It is sad this is where we all are now.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a few fairly religious Jewish friends who regularly ask folks to share the list of high holidays so people don’t schedule important meetings in those days. I think tagging people is a bit much on holiday good wishes but tbf I almost never tag people and rarely post on social media at all so my normalcy calibration might be off. I do see your point about making assumptions about people’s religion, though. If any of these are close friends you can maybe mention it to them another time that it feels odd to be wished greetings as part of a blanket statement without any personal calibration? If acquaintances, I would probably mute them; maybe if their posts get little enough engagement they’ll stop?

I am not close enough with either of them to say anything - and honestly I'm not even sure what I'd say. I don't have an argument for NOT doing this - it just feels off to me. There's nothing I can point to and say, "you shouldn't do this and here's why" - I just feel like it's a weird thing to have non-Jews posting about Jewish holidays, and presuming to share some expertise.

The thing my friend shred about the holidays was originally put up by someone who went to a Lutheran theology school (I see in his profile) then got shared something like 4,000 times. It's not objectionable in content - it just feels weird for someone who is a Christian to be holding himself up as an expert in how to be considerate to the Jews around their holidays (which obviously we can't presume anyone is already familiar with since of course Jews are other and exotic). It feels weird is all!