Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Great dates. Regular sex. Life is good.

Woman here 45 yo. Dating is fun but I miss regular marital sex. How do you get regular sex if most OLD relationships last 2-4 months, and then you need to look for someone new ?

I’m not sure where the 2-4 months figure comes from. After divorce and dating casually, I was in an OLD relationship for 12 months. We saw each other every weekend and occasionally during the week. I’ve been in another OLD relationship for 9 months now. Much better and more regular than during my 15 year marriage.

I’m unable to find a long playing arrangement which would be both exclusive and with a person I like to have sex with. I only liked 2 men after 100 dates or so. None of them lasted more than 4 months (they were both high profile high income maybe that’s the reason). People just continue dating and eventually find someone more appealing if it’s FWB. Of course many more are interested in having sex with me, but I’m not into sex with someone overweight, or not as educated. FWB would need to have a certain intelligence component for me to want him.

Anonymous wrote:How do you get regular sex outside a relationship ? My issue as a woman in mid 40s I still need sex. Short term dating relationships from OLD don’t satisfy my need. (Last too little, people continue dating around and only are able to meet 1-2 times/week). I miss marital sex.

I have much more regular (and far more interesting) sex than during years of a sexless marriage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Great dates. Regular sex. Life is good.

Woman here 45 yo. Dating is fun but I miss regular marital sex. How do you get regular sex if most OLD relationships last 2-4 months, and then you need to look for someone new ?

I’m not sure where the 2-4 months figure comes from. After divorce and dating casually, I was in an OLD relationship for 12 months. We saw each other every weekend and occasionally during the week. I’ve been in another OLD relationship for 9 months now. Much better and more regular than during my 15 year marriage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not officially divorced but legally separated for 8 years with an young adult DD, and I have no interest in marrying again. I am dating and I still find it hard to call my « friend » a « boyfriend ». I have no interest in living with someone again or being someone’s stepmom. I am not sure why people are so scared to be alone.

I am long term separated, but not as long as you. Hiw come you stay separated instead of divorcing? Do you have any regrets?

And does your "friend" have no issues with the fact you're separated but not divorced (and don't look like youre headed for divorce if you've been separated for 8 years)? Asking without snark or judgement, since you can't hear tone on a post. Just wondering how he feels about it and why you're not choosing to divorce.

To answer your questions, I live in a place that is no fault divorce. I left my ex because he refused to stay on his meds, cheated, was abusive, and could not hold a job not to mention was a deadbeat dad. At the time, he was on disability and could ask me for spousal support since I was the breadwinner. I am finally passed the 6 years point, but lockdowns etc got in the way. It’s on my to-do-list! No regrets leaving him and raising my child on my own. We haven’t seen him in 8 years.

My new « friend » brings it up every once in awhile. I think he wants more from me. He is 10 years younger with a 12 DS. We will see.

How do you get regular sex outside a relationship ? My issue as a woman in mid 40s I still need sex. Short term dating relationships from OLD don’t satisfy my need. (Last too little, people continue dating around and only are able to meet 1-2 times/week). I miss marital sex.

My mom said this for 15 years after her divorce. Just got remarried last year to her long term boyfriend (his 3rd marriage).

So yeah, things change. Enjoy your new found independence for now.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Divorced DCUM women coping that they will never get remarried because they don’t need no man and totally not because no man wants an aging single mom, lmao.

This is the most common phenomenon I’ve come to be aware of, as a woman who dates and takes lovers.

Men say they praise independent, strong women. And a very minute percentage do- the confident, well grounded, successful men with a high EQ DO get engaged and aroused by powerful women. They are a minority.

But it threatens most men- who respond like the above.


If they know they’re not good enough to f!ck you, they want to fight you. It’s so common.

This is because most men only see women as objects that exist to please men. If a woman has no interest in pleasing a man, ie a women who doesn't want to date, she is useless.

Anonymous wrote:Divorced DCUM women coping that they will never get remarried because they don’t need no man and totally not because no man wants an aging single mom, lmao.

This is the most common phenomenon I’ve come to be aware of, as a woman who dates and takes lovers.

Men say they praise independent, strong women. And a very minute percentage do- the confident, well grounded, successful men with a high EQ DO get engaged and aroused by powerful women. They are a minority.

But it threatens most men- who respond like the above.


If they know they’re not good enough to f!ck you, they want to fight you. It’s so common.

My mom never showed interest in dating after leaving my father… she moved in with her single sister instead, who was a major upgrade in terms of income, household division of labor, and companionship. They both seem so much happier and less worn out than women who spent their 30s-60s with a man. I mean it- older married women are so much worse for wear.

I didn’t learn my lesson though and got married 😂

Me! I’ve been divorced for 15 years and have raised DS on my own. I have an amazing life. I used to think I wanted a life partner but now I don’t.

I’m happier than some, but not all, of my married friends. Marriage doesn’t mean guaranteed happiness for ever after. It can be good, even great, but sometimes it’s just a slog.

Happy to be surrounded by friends and a faith community, professionally successful and self supporting, and independent. And yes, I have sex regularly too.

Anonymous wrote:Divorced DCUM women coping that they will never get remarried because they don’t need no man and totally not because no man wants an aging single mom, lmao.

I’m living proof they do (I’m 53). Their only concern w a single mom is whether her parenting schedule will allow for enough sex and attention to sustain a monogamous LTR.

Anonymous wrote:Divorced DCUM women coping that they will never get remarried because they don’t need no man and totally not because no man wants an aging single mom, lmao.

We don't want your bald headed, fat, incel a## anyway!

Anonymous wrote:Divorced DCUM women coping that they will never get remarried because they don’t need no man and totally not because no man wants an aging single mom, lmao.

DCUM men refusing to believe women can be perfectly happy without a man and instead engaging in well-trod stereotypes, lol!

Anonymous wrote:Divorced DCUM women coping that they will never get remarried because they don’t need no man and totally not because no man wants an aging single mom, lmao.

I could care less - I'm busy living the best life ❤️

Anonymous wrote:I do want a partner but i don't want to remarry. I think marriage encourages laziness in relationships.

That's what I think, too. Like taking the other person for granted. I loved the new relationship part. I hope I find someone new, but I would also be happy not talking to another man again, LOL!