Anonymous wrote:Wow, you seem to be a very cold person.

It is completely life-changing to lose a partner at a young age and not have the years together you envisioned. It's way worse than divorce. At least the person is alive.

She has to take care of their kids alone and help them deal with grief and also grieve the life she had thought she would have and figure how to move forward. Stop being a rubbernecker and try to be helpful instead of a jerk.

Thank you, PP. My husband died when my youngest was a baby. When I am a very old lady, I'll remember the kindness of the friends and neighbors who brought meals, babysat so I could visit attorneys, call the insurance company or if I simply needed time to cry. The ones who brought meals over and mowed the lawn without asking I am forever grateful to.

There were definitely people like OP around who just wanted to gawk at the new widow and make comments about grieving. I'd just as soon forget people like that.

You do not want to know. I lost my Mother who was my best friend in the world and my brother, who was my second best friend within 5 years of each other. I struggled VERY hard. I lost all of my friends because I just couldn't. When I was able to move on, i did and made new ones, carved out a new life, etc. But, I lived in a very dark place and was suicidal myself for 2 years and struggling to work and be perfect at that, raise 2 kids and be available for them. After that, I took of my mask and just died every single day. The kindest person cooked for me and my family when I was in the hospital after a suicide miss. She also took me to a coffee shop and just listened to me vent. I could not imagine losing my husband and having kids at home . Please be kind to grieving people.

Wow, you seem to be a very cold person.

It is completely life-changing to lose a partner at a young age and not have the years together you envisioned. It's way worse than divorce. At least the person is alive.

She has to take care of their kids alone and help them deal with grief and also grieve the life she had thought she would have and figure how to move forward. Stop being a rubbernecker and try to be helpful instead of a jerk.

Anonymous wrote:It’s far more abnormal to act like everything is fine and remarry immediately, like my dad unfortunately did.

That’s actually amazingly common and some say it’s the mark of a happy marriage.

Anonymous wrote:It’s not for you to understand or judge, OP. Your attitude and your entitlement is gross.

Agree

I felt this way when my mom died at age 61 and I was mid 30’s. F everyone else who has no clue what I’m going through and still has their healthy mom to love and support them. I don’t want to see anyone. I think (hope) I was still normal to my kids though.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:at home can you tell me what is going through your mind? We have a neighbor who lost her DH a few months ago and she is acting so differently. From a human experience I want to know what she's going through?

Is she going through a F the world phase? Is that what I'm seeing??

Everyone grieves differently. You’re seeing what you already know you’re seeing— one woman who has lost her spouse while caring for kids still at home. Wtf kind of question is this?

You were looking to get pissed off when you read the post. Just a question

Nope, I’m perfectly fine. OPs question was judgmental and voyeuristic.

Are you a bot?

Anonymous wrote:OP, my armchair diagnosis is that you may be a sociopath or psycopath. Your lack of empathy in understanding the range of responses to the death of a loved one is concerning.

That sounds harsh. I am sure it is shocking to think about if one has never experienced loss.

OP, my armchair diagnosis is that you may be a sociopath or psycopath. Your lack of empathy in understanding the range of responses to the death of a loved one is concerning.

Anonymous wrote:It’s far more abnormal to act like everything is fine and remarry immediately, like my dad unfortunately did.

No even that is not “abnormal” at all. People grieve differently. What’s with all the judgement?

Anonymous wrote:Ugh, I was just trying to get some insight from real anon people.

I'll just google it instead...This is interesting...

On average, normal grief can last anywhere from 6 months to 2 years or more.

Do you seriously need to crowdsource how long a person might grieve the death of her husband and father of her children?? There is seriously something wrong with you.