Feeling deeply alone tonight, I Googled: I really miss my Mom who died

A short while later, I scrolled down to this website.

Thank-you to all the thoughtful and encouraging people who have expressed similar feelings about their Moms who died.

Last week was my sixth Thanksgiving Day without my amazing Mom, and, in a little over three weeks, my sixth Christmas since she died.

I’ll never “get over it” nor do I want to.

Just get a bit stronger to carry my sadness and longing together with a lot of gratitude for my inspiring and unconditionally loving Mom.

The best part of my life was being part of Mom’s life.

The worst part of my life began the moment she died.

Affirming her love, were these words, spoken to me not long before she died, at home, as I held her hand:

“I will always live in your heart”

It goes the other way too - cell of the fetus remain in the mother’s brain forever. They obviously never reach the father’s brain.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have always taken comfort in those studies that show that maternal cells are carried by their children for the rest of their lives. You carry you mom with you in your body, OP. She is with you all the time.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ to you. It is so hard.

Both maternal and paternal cells. For each pair of homologous chromosomes in your body one will be maternal and one will be paternal. Please don’t try to minimize the importance of fathers.

You don't understand DNA. Go google mitochondrial DNA. Also, mothers are marginalized enough. This is a thread about mothers. If you miss your father, or want a father appreciation thread, why don't you go start one? What is this pathological need to insert fathers into every discussion about mothers? Are you an Andrew Tate fan?

Anonymous wrote:I have always taken comfort in those studies that show that maternal cells are carried by their children for the rest of their lives. You carry you mom with you in your body, OP. She is with you all the time.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ to you. It is so hard.

Both maternal and paternal cells. For each pair of homologous chromosomes in your body one will be maternal and one will be paternal. Please don’t try to minimize the importance of fathers.

I’m so sorry you lost your mom. I wish you some peace. Good reminder to love those in our midst.

NP.

My mom passed three years ago. We talked at least once a day, if not more. My DH calls his parents every Sunday night and every week it hurts so badly that I cannot do that.

This sucks.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The title says it all. I miss her so much. She died at 86, I'm 50. She's been gone 2 years. I didn't appreciate her enough or show her enough love while she was alive. There is so much I wish I could tell her. For some reason the pain of missing her gets worse with time.

Yawn. You need therapy. You sound emotionally stunted if you cannot move on.

You sound like a sociopath.

I have found that grief for those I love deeply doesn’t just flow through the stages. It comes back and intensifies and then dissipates again. It’s a loss that changes your life forever, and it’s ok to miss people. It’s ok to cry sometimes no matter how long it’s been. There are other times where memories bring laughter and smiles.

Anonymous wrote:The title says it all. I miss her so much. She died at 86, I'm 50. She's been gone 2 years. I didn't appreciate her enough or show her enough love while she was alive. There is so much I wish I could tell her. For some reason the pain of missing her gets worse with time.

Yawn. You need therapy. You sound emotionally stunted if you cannot move on.

It took me about 4 years to not actively miss my parents. I got hit with grief for both of them after my mother died. I now think of them, but not daily. Still miss them, but the pain is not as sharp.

i am 34 my mommy was my best friend and died unexpectedly at 67 almost 6 months ago now idk how im going to go one without her

Anonymous wrote:This is the OP. I had to do a little searching to find this thread. I was moving along pretty well and today it hit me like a ton of bricks how much I miss my mom. Out of seemingly nowhere. I believe that our souls don’t die with our bodies so I find comfort on some deeper level that her spirit is alive, but on a day like today I’d give anything to go out for a walk with her, hold her hand, sit on a bench and look at the trees - I’d give anything just to be able to talk to her again.

Go ahead and talk to her, OP. I'm the PP who recently lost my mother as well, and I can't tell you how often I find myself talking to her on my morning walk or as I go about my day. I try to find comfort in knowing that she loved and still loves me even beyond physical existence, so she would want me to try to be happy and live what's left of my life as joyously and meaningfully as possible. I know this is how I feel and what I would want for my daughters as well, once I leave this earthly existence. Big hug to you today, and in the days to come as well, OP. Keep coming back and let us know how you're doing. It helps people like me know that I'm not alone in dealing with the grief of losing my mom.

This is the OP. I had to do a little searching to find this thread. I was moving along pretty well and today it hit me like a ton of bricks how much I miss my mom. Out of seemingly nowhere. I believe that our souls don’t die with our bodies so I find comfort on some deeper level that her spirit is alive, but on a day like today I’d give anything to go out for a walk with her, hold her hand, sit on a bench and look at the trees - I’d give anything just to be able to talk to her again.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was just talking to my 11 year old the other day about the things left unsaid. He was worried that I would get in a car accident or something and that his last words to me might not be great. He's worried that he hasn't said to me everything he wants to say or feels in his heart.

I told him that I know everything that's left unsaid. There are no bad "last words" because they are just words. Words don't change our time together or replace all the things we have done.

Wise words.

+1

+2

My mom died suddenly about a decade ago. I still miss her today.

What has helped over the years is taking time to remember her in small ways. I make her favorite cookie on her birthday. She had a gentle way and really listened to people. I make an effort to spread that quality when I can. It doesn't take the ache away, but it does make the ache a bit more bittersweet. I also feel closer to her in those ways.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was just talking to my 11 year old the other day about the things left unsaid. He was worried that I would get in a car accident or something and that his last words to me might not be great. He's worried that he hasn't said to me everything he wants to say or feels in his heart.

I told him that I know everything that's left unsaid. There are no bad "last words" because they are just words. Words don't change our time together or replace all the things we have done.

Wise words.

+1