Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
All I care about is whether the food is good, OP. In my experience, people are usually such bad cooks that bringing grocery store or restaurant food will yield the same result: the crispy things will be soggy, everything will be too fat, too salty or too sweet.

Now perhaps you *meant* to say that her food was awful, while the rest was delicious home-made fare. In that case, you have my sympathies, but also a question: if no one eats her food, hasn't she got the message yet? Or maybe this poor relative is incapable of cooking, and just wants to contribute. Perhaps then you should just thank her and be nice.

People do eat it, but I'm sure it is only to be polite. My mother spent a long time making three quiches and was hurt that those didn't get "sympathy" eaten like the waffles. Everyone says her food is "fun" or better than they could make at home.

Ah okay. So you and your mom are sour because this relative has managed to provide food that people like, rather than spending a long time making food that no one eats. Other people are not upset and think her food is both fun and of good quality.

I think you and your mom should stop attending family events with this person, since you both seem to resent her so much.

Anonymous wrote:OP. Yes, a typo. The issue is she isn't putting any real effort. She is picking up stuff from a store or restaurant. Everyone else is taking the time to cook food and plate it. She literally stops on her way over. Can't even put on a real platter or bowl. She agrees to bring items but can't bother to make things. Her own family is only worth a quick stop at the grocery store.The rest of the family says how good the soup is or such but they are only being nice. It is so dismissive of her. She eats everyone else's real food.

Anonymous wrote:How can I tell a family member to stop bringing their lousy food to potlucks. For mother's Day she brought two huge containers of lobster bisque from a grocery store with plastic cups and spoons to serve it in. broke up some cheese crisps to drop on top & little paper container of heavy whipping cream. For a brunch, she bought 10 waffles from waffle house. cut in quarters and put out some kinds of syrup in the bottles, can of whip cream, blueberries, cut up strawberries at my house, and put on a plastic platter from a dollar store. Other things like crab rangoons & egg rolls from a Chinese restaurant with a bunch of chopsticks. She "served" those in the takeout red/white containers.

This is all stuff she brings right from the grocery store or restaurants, still in the bags, wrapped up. Everyone else makes food and brings it in nice containers. Should I assign her items to bring or just tell her to not bother with her grocery store run? With holiday tomorrow who knows what she'll show up with.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
All I care about is whether the food is good, OP. In my experience, people are usually such bad cooks that bringing grocery store or restaurant food will yield the same result: the crispy things will be soggy, everything will be too fat, too salty or too sweet.

Now perhaps you *meant* to say that her food was awful, while the rest was delicious home-made fare. In that case, you have my sympathies, but also a question: if no one eats her food, hasn't she got the message yet? Or maybe this poor relative is incapable of cooking, and just wants to contribute. Perhaps then you should just thank her and be nice.

People do eat it, but I'm sure it is only to be polite. My mother spent a long time making three quiches and was hurt that those didn't get "sympathy" eaten like the waffles. Everyone says her food is "fun" or better than they could make at home.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
All I care about is whether the food is good, OP. In my experience, people are usually such bad cooks that bringing grocery store or restaurant food will yield the same result: the crispy things will be soggy, everything will be too fat, too salty or too sweet.

Now perhaps you *meant* to say that her food was awful, while the rest was delicious home-made fare. In that case, you have my sympathies, but also a question: if no one eats her food, hasn't she got the message yet? Or maybe this poor relative is incapable of cooking, and just wants to contribute. Perhaps then you should just thank her and be nice.

People do eat it, but I'm sure it is only to be polite. My mother spent a long time making three quiches and was hurt that those didn't get "sympathy" eaten like the waffles. Everyone says her food is "fun" or better than they could make at home.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
All I care about is whether the food is good, OP. In my experience, people are usually such bad cooks that bringing grocery store or restaurant food will yield the same result: the crispy things will be soggy, everything will be too fat, too salty or too sweet.

Now perhaps you *meant* to say that her food was awful, while the rest was delicious home-made fare. In that case, you have my sympathies, but also a question: if no one eats her food, hasn't she got the message yet? Or maybe this poor relative is incapable of cooking, and just wants to contribute. Perhaps then you should just thank her and be nice.

People do eat it, but I'm sure it is only to be polite. My mother spent a long time making three quiches and was hurt that those didn't get "sympathy" eaten like the waffles. Everyone says her food is "fun" or better than they could make at home.

THE GOAL IS THAT THE FOOD IS EDIBLE.
THE GOAL IS NOT TO REWARD EFFORT.
This is not a Kindergartener's craft project!

Sorry to be blunt, but your mother's quiches are not appreciated by this crowd, and this person's food is.

When people want to be polite, they take a tiny token amount on their plate. If this relative's food is being eaten in large amounts, and she gets compliments every single time, then she is wisely making the right food choices. Your mother has to get better at cooking what people want to eat, or take a leaf out of the relative's book and buy food.