Anonymous
Post 05/24/2023 00:45     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
I got my first IUD a few months ago and I love it, especially now that my periods are settling into basically stopping altogether. I was very nervous about the insertion but had no problems. That seems very, VERY dependent on the provider and their procedures, so highly recommended looking into that beforehand. They should at least offer numbing beforehand.

IUDs have a low hormone dose compared to oral pills, but some people react badly to any hormones so might be worth first trying an easier-to-change hormonal method just in case. The Nuvaring is controversial because of a slightly higher chance of blood clots, but I adored mine.

I was a virgin till my late 20s, but I sort of wish I’d started hormonal birth control even before that because addressing my severely painful periods made life so much better. On the other end of the spectrum, some people hate messing with their hormones and would prefer condoms even where it’s not needed for STD protection. Only your daughter will know how she wants to balance all those choices, though I agree there’s never a harm in making sure she’s well-informed on her options.

Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 21:05     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
IUD, but get it now. If she has side effects and wants to switch, it’s easier to do that while not also navigating the first months away from home. If you get it now, she has three months to adjust.

Weird purity mother(s) I think you’re trolls. Whoever said it’s not worth it to avoid pregnancy from rape is also not watching the news these days.

Which reminds me. OP you need to explain to her that all (all!) birth control can fail. If you’re sending her out of state you need to send her with pregnancy tests, and explain advance provision. Which is horrible and I’m sorry but the alternatives are worse.
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 20:33     Subject: Re:Contraceptive for DD heading to college
My DD got nexplanon and has loved it. Now out of college and still using it.
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 20:29     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would ask her what she thinks? As my kids get older I’m really trying to mom less and empower them to make choices with some light guidance. Where does she think she should go? Does she want to be on BC? If so what type might she like? Ask her what kind of doctor she would like to see.

I’m really surprised though that you have a daughter that is headed off to college and she has never seen a gynecologist. This was our first stop after my daughter got her first period.


Really? I don't know anyone who has brought in a daughter that young. At our gyno/ped the standard is 18 years old or whenever you may become sexually active, whichever comes first.


As a high school teacher (now VP) who very unfortunately has interrupted bathroom sex, car sex and outdoor sex on school property during school hours how do you know your kids aren’t sexually active? I’ve had many tough conversations with parents who are truly floored that their kids have any interest in romantic relationships, let alone sex. I had one girl who was from a Muslim culture and couldn’t bring myself to notify her parents (for which I could have been fired) because I had a feeling it would have put her in a deadly situation. Every single parent of a female is “shocked “ when they find out their daughter is sexually active. The boys patens are usually just pissed off their son made a stupid choice, but rated do I get “but he isn’t sexually active” it’s always the parents of girls who are rocked.

We now have locked single use bathrooms for kids who might be uncomfortable using their assigned gender bathroom or other kids who for whatever reason need privacy, but we now have to station a monitor outside of those bathrooms at all times because of the sex and drugs that go on in there. If we don’t have a monitor we have to lock and shut the bathrooms down.

Being in the school system for 20 years now, with my own kids I assume nothing. My daughter has had an IUD since age 15, despite me thinking she’s not sexually active. But I can’t follow her every moment of the day nor can I have the expectation that my daughter will tell me everything.
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 20:12     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would ask her what she thinks? As my kids get older I’m really trying to mom less and empower them to make choices with some light guidance. Where does she think she should go? Does she want to be on BC? If so what type might she like? Ask her what kind of doctor she would like to see.

I’m really surprised though that you have a daughter that is headed off to college and she has never seen a gynecologist. This was our first stop after my daughter got her first period.


Really? I don't know anyone who has brought in a daughter that young. At our gyno/ped the standard is 18 years old or whenever you may become sexually active, whichever comes first.


Do you really discuss your daughters vagina with your friends? I don’t poll people I just went with the recommendation of our pediatrician and ACOG. Your gyno is not following the reccomended standard.

I’m really surprised with all these intimate discussions you have about your daughters vaginas that all of them have reported their daughters remaining sexually chaste until the age of 18.
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 19:15     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Have you asked her? I waited until marriage and would have offended if my parents had dragged me to the doctor for birth control just because I was going off to college.


And you were so smart and clever to avoid being raped.


Idk that the risk/benefits of side effects of birth control are worth it if you're only trying to avoid getting pregnant from rape.


Well, out of my group of 10 close girlfriends from college, none of us managed to graduate college without being raped or sexually assaulted. And with the current political climate how it is with abortion being banned all over and talk about banning plan B, I wouldn't send my DD away to college without being on some form of BC.


That's quite shocking. I know #metoo and all but I didn't have a single close friend in college who was raped or assaulted. We didn't hang out at frats though and many of us are now married to our college boyfriends.
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 18:51     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
I started the pill the first week of college and managed to take it everyday. I set an alarm on my phone (early 2000s) to remind me to take it everyday.

Give your daughter some credit that she can take responsibility for this. Whether that be deciding on which BC to use or scheduling her appointments. I did all of that on my own - it was good practice for adult life.

And make sure if she takes the pill she knows that antibiotics can make it ineffective.
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 17:59     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Have you asked her? I waited until marriage and would have offended if my parents had dragged me to the doctor for birth control just because I was going off to college.


And you were so smart and clever to avoid being raped.


Idk that the risk/benefits of side effects of birth control are worth it if you're only trying to avoid getting pregnant from rape.


The reason is because have no idea what your kid is really up to.
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 17:53     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Have you asked her? I waited until marriage and would have offended if my parents had dragged me to the doctor for birth control just because I was going off to college.


And you were so smart and clever to avoid being raped.


I did avoid it, yes.


Congrats?
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 17:52     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Have you asked her? I waited until marriage and would have offended if my parents had dragged me to the doctor for birth control just because I was going off to college.


And you were so smart and clever to avoid being raped.


Idk that the risk/benefits of side effects of birth control are worth it if you're only trying to avoid getting pregnant from rape.


Well, out of my group of 10 close girlfriends from college, none of us managed to graduate college without being raped or sexually assaulted. And with the current political climate how it is with abortion being banned all over and talk about banning plan B, I wouldn't send my DD away to college without being on some form of BC.
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 17:52     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This was us last summer. DD asked to go on the pill before going away. Pediatrician said to see a gynecologist.


Ok sounds like no point to start with her pedestrian


Just take her to Planned Parenthood. You don't need to see the pediatrician. They're just going to tell you that they don't do that and tell you to go elsewhere. Waste of time.
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 17:51     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any feedback on nexplanon (the one that goes In The arm)?


Terrible don’t do it. IUD is the way to go


I am a CNM and work at Planned Parenthood so getting young women started on birth control is pretty much what I do all day long. There is no “terrible“ birth-control, or “best“ either. There are many good options out there they all have their pluses and minuses and more importantly people’s experiences with them vary tremendously. I’m a huge fan of the Nexplanon for many reasons. It’s is painless going in and the most effective contraceptive out there. Officially the effectiveness rate is meant to be the same as the IUD but practice I have seen many MANY pregnancies on IUDs over the years and exactly one pregnancy on the implant. Not everybody likes it and people who don’t come back to get it removed. IUDs can be terrific but the insertion process can also be quite traumatic for some and ongoing pain and cramping is a real issues so it’s not that one is better than the other. It really just depends on personal comfort and what one is looking for. ( Though I do really like the smaller Skyla IUD for teens even though it is associated with more unpredictable bleeding.) Please be distrustful of any practitioner who tells you what the “best” method it is. That just means they like it. The best thing you and your dd can do is educate yourself about all of the options that are out there and decide which potential side effects are most acceptable or unacceptable to her and then give it a try. It takes a lot of people a few different methods to find the one that works best for them. Good luck!
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 17:51     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Following as my DD is heading off to college and asked to go on contraception.
She has an appointment with a GYN this summer.

For those with experience with this, have any of your DDs opted for a non-pill contraceptive like an IUD, implant, or injections? I'm concerned DD will forget to take the pill daily.


The IUD is the surest bet (for contraceptive purposes) v. implants or injections. The insertion is rather painful, however. You/she really need to speak up about the gyn numbing her during it.


This! I had one put in years ago and couldn't believe how painful it was. DD learned from social media to advocate for numbing during the procedure or find a new doctor. Luckily, the doctor she selected always offers numbing during insertion. DD has had no issues with her IUD and has had hers for 3 years now.

Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 17:41     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Have you asked her? I waited until marriage and would have offended if my parents had dragged me to the doctor for birth control just because I was going off to college.


And you were so smart and clever to avoid being raped.


Idk that the risk/benefits of side effects of birth control are worth it if you're only trying to avoid getting pregnant from rape.
Anonymous
Post 05/23/2023 17:41     Subject: Contraceptive for DD heading to college
Anonymous wrote:Any feedback on nexplanon (the one that goes In The arm)?


Terrible don’t do it. IUD is the way to go