Anonymous wrote:I think you're all missing the issue. If her DH doesn't want to lip kiss his children for any reason, he shouldn't be pressured or shamed by OP to do it.

I think you're missing the issue! OP said her DH criticizes her for kissing on the lips.

Anonymous wrote:Oh my god. It's just a quick kiss on the lips. No tongue, no lingering. Get a grip, people!

Seriously. Age three??? That's sweet, OP!

I think many Americans were raised to believe that kissing generally, but especially kissing faces, is purely sexual. I don't know why. I guess this is a puritanical influence.

Those of us who grew up in traditions where it is very normal to kiss family and friends on the face don't have these issues so I think it's much more normalized to kiss kids on the face and lips and for them to do the same with you and each other.

With my own child, because she's being raised in the US where some of these hang ups exist, I don't force it on her but I definitely don't avoid it. She went through a brief period in kindergarten where she decided literally all kissing is gross (the influence of peers no doubt) but then she got over it and now she kisses me on the cheek and forehead and lets me do the same. But we don't kiss on the lips anymore -- that stuck with her. She now associates that with romantic love, which was inevitable. It doesn't bother me. I'm glad she's stayed very physically affectionate.

Anonymous wrote:Oh my god. It's just a quick kiss on the lips. No tongue, no lingering. Get a grip, people!

Ew no one is slipping their kid the tongue.

The ones most vocal are the stiff lip kidded

I think you're all missing the issue. If her DH doesn't want to lip kiss his children for any reason, he shouldn't be pressured or shamed by OP to do it.

Where I lived in various western European countries (UK, France, Germany), it was NOT done to kiss children on the lips. That was seen as a romantic thing between husband and wife.

I haven't seen it here either.

Since this is coming from a place of love, please don't feel you have to limit yourself to society's strictures. Do what feels right. But I just want you to be aware that your husband's view is the majority one, here and in many other countries in the world.

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s weird and don’t do it. We miss our kids on the cheek or head.

+1

This is peak DCUM: angst over affection; residual puritanism about which there is neither circumspection or perspective; judgment about any alternative but one's own view or practice.

I miss my young kids on the cheeks but if they kiss me on the lips I don’t modify at this age. They’re very little just showing affection.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gosh, we must be weird. I definitely give my kids a quick kiss on the lips sometimes.

Us too, and they were able to figure out just fine that you don't just go around kissing people. I guess I don't really do it anymore with my oldest, but I don't remember when we stopped. I would never reject a kiss from my kids though!

+1 us too. I have never been worried that they will kiss other people on the lips. In fact, my kids don’t like to kiss or even hug anyone else besides us.

As long as kids feel loved and aren’t starved of physical touch, families are welcome to make their own choices. What is very sad is adults calling other families disgusting, weird, and gross. I think we can all tell who has the kind kids on the playground.

This is a change in the US in the past 40 years. If you look at TV shows from the 70’s, everyone is kissing on the lips. Old, young, intergenerational …..

Anonymous wrote:We do on the lips smooch. It’s a quick peck. Sometimes on the cheek or top of head. It’s sweet.

Disgusting

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s weird and don’t do it. We miss our kids on the cheek or head.

Agree