Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^ also I don’t assume I’m offending anyone bc I assume they’re just throwing something out to a huge bunch of people. I don’t think they are being rude, but I also don’t think I’m being rude. One on one I would engage. I hate mass texts and emails. It’s not my thing.

I mean, how many people are on the text? If it’s like 4 people that’s not a huge amount.

I have been on texts with over 10 numbers for park invites and I don’t know more than 2 of the families.

Anonymous wrote:^^^ also I don’t assume I’m offending anyone bc I assume they’re just throwing something out to a huge bunch of people. I don’t think they are being rude, but I also don’t think I’m being rude. One on one I would engage. I hate mass texts and emails. It’s not my thing.

I mean, how many people are on the text? If it’s like 4 people that’s not a huge amount.

People are weird about group texts/emails. They always just wait for someone else to do the first response, but that doesn’t work when every person does that…

^^^ also I don’t assume I’m offending anyone bc I assume they’re just throwing something out to a huge bunch of people. I don’t think they are being rude, but I also don’t think I’m being rude. One on one I would engage. I hate mass texts and emails. It’s not my thing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it is rude to not respond to an invitation.

I don’t view a group text as a personal invitation.

That’s cool. It takes 2 seconds to respond: “sorry we can’t make it.” Some of you are very entitled and self centered.

If I’m on group texts with multiple people I don’t know, I usually don’t respond.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it is rude to not respond to an invitation.

I don’t view a group text as a personal invitation.

Same.

I think it's rude not to respond and I've been on the other side. I wrote it off that the other mom was overwhelmed but now see that her kid didn't want to hang out with mine (or she didn't want her to). Whatever, their loss but also agree that as a working mom who wasn't in the playdate circuit because I could never host, your kid will be fine if they aren't with their friends all the time at a playdate (PP are correct that aftercare, scouting, etc count as socialization).

I think you have good intentions but if I was getting group texts every three weeks from a mom I was not that close to and no one was replying I would think there was something off here. Agree on changing your tactic but also agree with you that people should respond.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it is rude to not respond to an invitation.

I don’t view a group text as a personal invitation.

That’s cool. It takes 2 seconds to respond: “sorry we can’t make it.” Some of you are very entitled and self centered.

About 50% of the people seem to not respond even to a party paperless invitation. They open it on their phone and read it and forget to respond.

In DC we don’t have time to do play dates with your average kids

Just take your kids to the park. The very nice playground with all the cool slides, etc. Stop trying to arrange playtimes because people don't have time. Take your time back.

I bet if you say you're taking your kids to the cool playground tomorrow and would their kid like to go with you, then you would get a taker.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it is rude to not respond to an invitation.

I don’t view a group text as a personal invitation.

OP i agree either way it is odd and rude that people are not responding, but I do think it is very likely related to the group text approach. Some of the moms don't have the other moms numbers so it is just a group text with random numbers. That just leaves people feeling weird. They dont really know what they are responding to or agreeing to. It also feels a bit like.. I don't know impersonal instead of hey my kid really likes your kid and wants to hang out. But more like - I'm just looking for someone, anyone, to come play with my kid. I just don't think you're going to get the same response.

I also always recommend on this site to not get bent out of shape about reciprocation. Families all run differently and some are just NOT going to reciprocate because their jobs are too busy, they don't like to host, so many different reasons. It doesn't necessarily mean they don't like you etc. As someone who usually hosts, you have to do it because you want to do it and not with an expectation.

Anonymous wrote:What on earth?? Someone texts you and you don't respond on at all? These people are rude, OP. Just drop them and try a new group of people.

Sometimes I think DCUM must be a different universe. No one I know acts like this in real life.

If the group text is to 5+ numbers, you want to minimize the back-and-forth, or people will start removing themselves from the group thread.

If you live far enough away from school friends, then that might be a problem, a lot of people want to minimize driving, or don't want to drive twice (dropoff and pickup).

Have you tried setting up a play date at the school playground or nearby park?

And yeah, the group text takes the personal responsibility to respond, people assume someone else will reach out and join the playdate, and they don't have to.