Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:56     Subject: 21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
You’re being unreasonable. He’s an adult. I find it hard to believe you think you should police his sex life.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:56     Subject: Re:21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP you are leaving out a lot of details. Did he drop out of college? Why is he living with you?

I actually agree with you that I would not be loaning my car to my 21 YO son who has chosen to live at home (not working?) and whose priority is driving an hour to see his girlfriend.

Tell him to get his life back on track and then worry about the GF.


He did not drop out. He has just finished school. He is now back at home.


What does this mean? College? What college finished classes already?

Maybe he finished in December. You are focusing on the wrong thing.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:56     Subject: 21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
I call troll
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:56     Subject: Re:21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP you are leaving out a lot of details. Did he drop out of college? Why is he living with you?

I actually agree with you that I would not be loaning my car to my 21 YO son who has chosen to live at home (not working?) and whose priority is driving an hour to see his girlfriend.

Tell him to get his life back on track and then worry about the GF.


He did not drop out. He has just finished school. He is now back at home.


Really? And graduated? What school is already over for the semester?

OP is a troll.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:55     Subject: 21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, you’re being unreasonable.


Really? Why?
I'm a little surprised.

Because he’s 21.
What are you worried about? Are they having sex? Why, yes; yes they are.
Can they have sex at any time during the day if they don’t spend the night? Yes they can.
Is he asking to do this in your house, where your rules apply? No he isn’t.
Stop trying to control him, you will just make him not want to visit, ever.


I know they are having sex. They can do that and he can go home.


You can’t force your son to live at your house. He’s 21.

I don't want to. He can follow my rules or leave.


He will leave. Hope you’re happy. You won’t see him again.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:55     Subject: Re:21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP you are leaving out a lot of details. Did he drop out of college? Why is he living with you?

I actually agree with you that I would not be loaning my car to my 21 YO son who has chosen to live at home (not working?) and whose priority is driving an hour to see his girlfriend.

Tell him to get his life back on track and then worry about the GF.


He did not drop out. He has just finished school. He is now back at home.


What does this mean? College? What college finished classes already?
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:55     Subject: 21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
I was the girlfriend in this situation. Fast forward 12 years, we're married with two kids and I still think my in-laws are judgemental, uptight people. We are not close to them. That is your future.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:54     Subject: 21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My 21 year old son met a girl at college in Feb. He sometimes sleeps over there at her place. I do not like this at all and we are butting heads. He has just come home from college and is furious we wont be allowing him to visit her overnight (1 hr away) while she is still at college.

Am I being unreasonable? He sometimes spends 36 hours straight with her.


Why to the bolded?

We are Catholic. We don't need to sleep over like that. Also, I just personally condone this.


They’re in a committed relationship. Get over it.


If they just met in Feb, I would question how "committed" their relationship is.


There’s nothing you can about it, nor should you try to, if you want your son to speak to you years from now.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:54     Subject: 21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, you’re being unreasonable.


Really? Why?
I'm a little surprised.

Because he’s 21.
What are you worried about? Are they having sex? Why, yes; yes they are.
Can they have sex at any time during the day if they don’t spend the night? Yes they can.
Is he asking to do this in your house, where your rules apply? No he isn’t.
Stop trying to control him, you will just make him not want to visit, ever.


I know they are having sex. They can do that and he can go home.


You can’t force your son to live at your house. He’s 21.

I don't want to. He can follow my rules or leave.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:54     Subject: Re:21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
Anonymous wrote:OP you are leaving out a lot of details. Did he drop out of college? Why is he living with you?

I actually agree with you that I would not be loaning my car to my 21 YO son who has chosen to live at home (not working?) and whose priority is driving an hour to see his girlfriend.

Tell him to get his life back on track and then worry about the GF.


He did not drop out. He has just finished school. He is now back at home.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:54     Subject: 21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, you’re being unreasonable.


Really? Why?
I'm a little surprised.

Because he’s 21.
What are you worried about? Are they having sex? Why, yes; yes they are.
Can they have sex at any time during the day if they don’t spend the night? Yes they can.
Is he asking to do this in your house, where your rules apply? No he isn’t.
Stop trying to control him, you will just make him not want to visit, ever.


I know they are having sex. They can do that and he can go home.


You can’t force your son to live at your house. He’s 21.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:53     Subject: 21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My 21 year old son met a girl at college in Feb. He sometimes sleeps over there at her place. I do not like this at all and we are butting heads. He has just come home from college and is furious we wont be allowing him to visit her overnight (1 hr away) while she is still at college.

Am I being unreasonable? He sometimes spends 36 hours straight with her.


Why to the bolded?

We are Catholic. We don't need to sleep over like that. Also, I just personally condone this.


They’re in a committed relationship. Get over it.


If they just met in Feb, I would question how "committed" their relationship is.

Apparently committed enough to want to spend a lot of time together. At any rate, That’s for them to decide, not mommy.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:52     Subject: 21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
Anonymous wrote:My parents never ever would have been cool with this. No. People are just becoming morally loose.


As my grandmother (b.1917) used to say about the college age kids, there is nothing they can do after dark that they can't do during the day. Think about that.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:52     Subject: Re:21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You are being unreasonable, yes. And exactly how do you plan to stop it?


I can't stop it but I won't be giving him use of my car to go there.

If he won't follow our rules, he can support himself.


So, does sonny boy live with you? Or is he home from college now?


He is home now and living with us. He was at college but moved home now.


Did he drop out?

No.
Anonymous
Post 04/16/2023 18:52     Subject: Re:21 year old son, overnights with girlfriend
OP you are leaving out a lot of details. Did he drop out of college? Why is he living with you?

I actually agree with you that I would not be loaning my car to my 21 YO son who has chosen to live at home (not working?) and whose priority is driving an hour to see his girlfriend.

Tell him to get his life back on track and then worry about the GF.