Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm white - I am almost physically incapable of showing up to someone's house without bringing something.

Really? Is this common knowledge?

Are you kidding? Of course you NEVER show up empty handed. You bring a hostess gift of some kind. Doesn't need to be food. White people know this.

Oh please. How much Real Housewives do you watch?

Whatever would take something off your to do list: a side dish or course, bread, wine or flowers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm white - I am almost physically incapable of showing up to someone's house without bringing something.

Really? Is this common knowledge?

Are you kidding? Of course you NEVER show up empty handed. You bring a hostess gift of some kind. Doesn't need to be food. White people know this.

I always just say, no need to bring anything, but if they persist I say fresh fruit or dried dates/figs. And by the way, those are my go-tos when I go to a religious person's home (or sealed nuts), because there are different religious dietary restrictions, and everyone has an allergy.

Anonymous wrote:"So excited to see you! Feel free to bring your favorite dessert or appetizer if you'd like, but no need!"

Exactly this.

As a white person often invited to multicultural parties I prefer a little direction.

Yes, please bring a dessert.

If everyone brought something I’d feel bad if I didn’t, but I’d at least bring flowers.

When I have a party I don’t want 100 desserts so it makes sense to give direction, it’s not rude. If I show up with a dessert and there are too many desserts I’d think ugh I wish I knew to bring x, of course I would not say that.

We had a catholic funeral and my non-Catholic friends called to find out what was appropriate food/customs/etc. it was not my family I was adjacent so it made sense to ask me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"We are covered for food. So just come and enjoy.

Also, I wanted to let you know that no alcohol or pork product will be served or consumed. "

I bet they will show up with baked goods or flowers/plants.

Ahhh no. No.

Ahhh. Yes. Yes.

Some people will show up with a bottle of wine, or pigs in a blanket - in a Muslim or Jewish home. Or will show up with beef products in a Hindu home. Better to make it clear. But, you can make it clear in a non-robotic way too if you want.

I think the "no. No." was referring to the robotic passive voice comment, which was - to be fair - dreadful.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"We are covered for food. So just come and enjoy.

Also, I wanted to let you know that no alcohol or pork product will be served or consumed. "

I bet they will show up with baked goods or flowers/plants.

Ahhh no. No.

Ahhh. Yes. Yes.

Some people will show up with a bottle of wine, or pigs in a blanket - in a Muslim or Jewish home. Or will show up with beef products in a Hindu home. Better to make it clear. But, you can make it clear in a non-robotic way too if you want.

That’s not the issue. See above.

Throw in an exclamation point somewhere unless you want your friend to think you’re annoyed with them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"We are covered for food. So just come and enjoy.

Also, I wanted to let you know that no alcohol or pork product will be served or consumed. "

I bet they will show up with baked goods or flowers/plants.

Ahhh no. No.

What's wrong with this?

DP.

It sounds a little...controlling or something. My SIL is married into a huge Pakistani family and none of them would ever say that. That said, we know what not to bring. I guess I would assume that OP's friends have some sort of clue, as well.

Much better that they let people know about no booze than not. The pork they can leave out, but most people expect alcohol at a party, so it’s nice to have a heads-up.

Anonymous wrote:I'm white - I am almost physically incapable of showing up to someone's house without bringing something.

Really? Is this common knowledge?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"We are covered for food. So just come and enjoy.

Also, I wanted to let you know that no alcohol or pork product will be served or consumed. "

I bet they will show up with baked goods or flowers/plants.

Ahhh no. No.

Ahhh. Yes. Yes.

Some people will show up with a bottle of wine, or pigs in a blanket - in a Muslim or Jewish home. Or will show up with beef products in a Hindu home. Better to make it clear. But, you can make it clear in a non-robotic way too if you want.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I'd say basically what you said here. "You don't need to bring anything at all! If I know South Asian and Middle Eastern folks—and I do, hahaha!!--they'll probably bring oodles to share. So you're welcome to contribute a drink or dessert or appetizer if you'd like, but we will have plenty either way!" Basically, just find a lighthearted way to tell them that your other international friends will probably bring stuff whether you ask them to or not, and then let the white americans do what they like with that info.

I'm a white American and this is the best way to say it. I would hate to show up empty handed when no one else does.

Yeah, I'd like a variation on this.

"I'm telling everyone not to bring anything because we'll have plenty of food and extras. My xxxxculturexxxxxx friends probably won't listen and bring dishes they like, but really it's never necessary."

Anonymous wrote:I say this as a courtesy but not because I’m hoping to bring anything. I will of course show up with a hostess gift and if asked to bring something I will. I think it’s impolite to ask guests to bring anything to a party you are hosting but I also think it’s impolite so show up empty handed. Lol. I’m not sure I helped. Sorry! I hope you enjoy your party!

This. I think its rude to ask people to bring stuff. Just tell them that they are not required to bring anything.
Honestly, the best way to learn about customs/cultures is to see it. Let them show up how they choose. If they notice that other people have brought food, they'll know for next time. But it's strange to assume that the white family - currently living in the US - should conform to other customs. Why is that required if you don't care if they bring something?
I say this as a hispanic married to an Arab. I would never tell anyone to bring a dish.

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I'd say basically what you said here. "You don't need to bring anything at all! If I know South Asian and Middle Eastern folks—and I do, hahaha!!--they'll probably bring oodles to share. So you're welcome to contribute a drink or dessert or appetizer if you'd like, but we will have plenty either way!" Basically, just find a lighthearted way to tell them that your other international friends will probably bring stuff whether you ask them to or not, and then let the white americans do what they like with that info.

I'm a white American and this is the best way to say it. I would hate to show up empty handed when no one else does.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"We are covered for food. So just come and enjoy.

Also, I wanted to let you know that no alcohol or pork product will be served or consumed. "

I bet they will show up with baked goods or flowers/plants.

Ahhh no. No.

What's wrong with this?

You shouldn’t text like an emotionless robot. The second line in particular comes off really odd.