Anonymous wrote: Yes, it seems it is a foreign concept. I am Asian who immigrated here. My kids had a happy, well adjusted, pampered childhood and they were always well behaved and respectful to us and their teachers because that was our home environment and culture.

But their heartfelt gratitude towards us came when they went to college and realized that their peers had really selfish parents, neglected childhoods, few memories of delicious hot family meals and general anxiety about life and their future. That their parents did not pay for their college, that they did not want to be bothered by their kids struggles. It is "18 and you are out". Many parents 'downsized' when kids left for college, many divorced, many converted the kids bedrooms into their hobby rooms.

Their respect towards us came when they started jobs and faced the bamboo ceiling that their parents had faced. They then realized how we managed to be prudent with our money and leapfrogged into UMC, even when we were underpaid and plied with more work than others. All of a sudden, they were proud of our accented English and stopped correcting us.

Their devotion towards us came when we were willing to sacrifice our money and leisure time willingly to take care of grandkids and provide real help to our children to grow their career and have a balanced life without worry for their children. They wanted us to speak in our native tongue to our grandkids and reclaim the language that was lost because we all were trying to fit in.

You reap what you sow. Your kids are human beings who were born to be loved and nurtured. What did you do for them? Just giving birth is not enough. When parents are loving, kind and nurturing - why won't their kids have respect and gratitude towards them?

Anonymous wrote:Apparently respecting your elders is a foreign concept. ACs should be grateful to their parents and pay them respect. They owe them respect.

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Yes, it seems it is a foreign concept. I am Asian who immigrated here. My kids had a happy, well adjusted, pampered childhood and they were always well behaved and respectful to us and their teachers because that was our home environment and culture.

But their heartfelt gratitude towards us came when they went to college and realized that their peers had really selfish parents, neglected childhoods, few memories of delicious hot family meals and general anxiety about life and their future. That their parents did not pay for their college, that they did not want to be bothered by their kids struggles. It is "18 and you are out". Many parents 'downsized' when kids left for college, many divorced, many converted the kids bedrooms into their hobby rooms.

Their respect towards us came when they started jobs and faced the bamboo ceiling that their parents had faced. They then realized how we managed to be prudent with our money and leapfrogged into UMC, even when we were underpaid and plied with more work than others. All of a sudden, they were proud of our accented English and stopped correcting us.

Their devotion towards us came when we were willing to sacrifice our money and leisure time willingly to take care of grandkids and provide real help to our children to grow their career and have a balanced life without worry for their children. They wanted us to speak in our native tongue to our grandkids and reclaim the language that was lost because we all were trying to fit in.

You reap what you sow. Your kids are human beings who were born to be loved and nurtured. What did you do for them? Just giving birth is not enough. When parents are loving, kind and nurturing - why won't their kids have respect and gratitude towards them?

This made me tear up — reminded me of my own (Asian) parents.

I'm sure Asian kids too can blame their parents for many things but no one can deny the sacrifices Asian & South Asian parents make for their families, specially their children.

Which is really admirable yet in some ways very unhealthy as it comes with reciprocal expectations.

Reciprocal expectations are healthy. Tradition is healthy. Unmitigated individualism is unhealthy.

Barf. Sorry, no. It’s 2023, not 1953.

Because our society is so healthy and prosperous today. Sure.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Yes, it seems it is a foreign concept. I am Asian who immigrated here. My kids had a happy, well adjusted, pampered childhood and they were always well behaved and respectful to us and their teachers because that was our home environment and culture.

But their heartfelt gratitude towards us came when they went to college and realized that their peers had really selfish parents, neglected childhoods, few memories of delicious hot family meals and general anxiety about life and their future. That their parents did not pay for their college, that they did not want to be bothered by their kids struggles. It is "18 and you are out". Many parents 'downsized' when kids left for college, many divorced, many converted the kids bedrooms into their hobby rooms.

Their respect towards us came when they started jobs and faced the bamboo ceiling that their parents had faced. They then realized how we managed to be prudent with our money and leapfrogged into UMC, even when we were underpaid and plied with more work than others. All of a sudden, they were proud of our accented English and stopped correcting us.

Their devotion towards us came when we were willing to sacrifice our money and leisure time willingly to take care of grandkids and provide real help to our children to grow their career and have a balanced life without worry for their children. They wanted us to speak in our native tongue to our grandkids and reclaim the language that was lost because we all were trying to fit in.

You reap what you sow. Your kids are human beings who were born to be loved and nurtured. What did you do for them? Just giving birth is not enough. When parents are loving, kind and nurturing - why won't their kids have respect and gratitude towards them?

This made me tear up — reminded me of my own (Asian) parents.

I'm sure Asian kids too can blame their parents for many things but no one can deny the sacrifices Asian & South Asian parents make for their families, specially their children.

Which is really admirable yet in some ways very unhealthy as it comes with reciprocal expectations.

Reciprocal expectations are healthy. Tradition is healthy. Unmitigated individualism is unhealthy.

Barf. Sorry, no. It’s 2023, not 1953.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Boomers want a parenting participation trophy.

This! And at the same time they can’t even show up for grandchildren. I have quite a few boomer relatives who are giddy that their kids struggle with grandkids and being a working parent. “Good! Now they can see what we went through!”

this is the attitude of my parents.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Boomers want a parenting participation trophy.

This! And at the same time they can’t even show up for grandchildren. I have quite a few boomer relatives who are giddy that their kids struggle with grandkids and being a working parent. “Good! Now they can see what we went through!”

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Yes, it seems it is a foreign concept. I am Asian who immigrated here. My kids had a happy, well adjusted, pampered childhood and they were always well behaved and respectful to us and their teachers because that was our home environment and culture.

But their heartfelt gratitude towards us came when they went to college and realized that their peers had really selfish parents, neglected childhoods, few memories of delicious hot family meals and general anxiety about life and their future. That their parents did not pay for their college, that they did not want to be bothered by their kids struggles. It is "18 and you are out". Many parents 'downsized' when kids left for college, many divorced, many converted the kids bedrooms into their hobby rooms.

Their respect towards us came when they started jobs and faced the bamboo ceiling that their parents had faced. They then realized how we managed to be prudent with our money and leapfrogged into UMC, even when we were underpaid and plied with more work than others. All of a sudden, they were proud of our accented English and stopped correcting us.

Their devotion towards us came when we were willing to sacrifice our money and leisure time willingly to take care of grandkids and provide real help to our children to grow their career and have a balanced life without worry for their children. They wanted us to speak in our native tongue to our grandkids and reclaim the language that was lost because we all were trying to fit in.

You reap what you sow. Your kids are human beings who were born to be loved and nurtured. What did you do for them? Just giving birth is not enough. When parents are loving, kind and nurturing - why won't their kids have respect and gratitude towards them?

Everything you’ve written here can be said about my parents. They sacrificed and provided love, attention, hot meals, etc. They lived below their means, saved, and sent us all to college. It’s so gross that you chose to live here and still think only Asians are good parents. If this country is so horrible, why did you raise your children here?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Yes, it seems it is a foreign concept. I am Asian who immigrated here. My kids had a happy, well adjusted, pampered childhood and they were always well behaved and respectful to us and their teachers because that was our home environment and culture.

But their heartfelt gratitude towards us came when they went to college and realized that their peers had really selfish parents, neglected childhoods, few memories of delicious hot family meals and general anxiety about life and their future. That their parents did not pay for their college, that they did not want to be bothered by their kids struggles. It is "18 and you are out". Many parents 'downsized' when kids left for college, many divorced, many converted the kids bedrooms into their hobby rooms.

Their respect towards us came when they started jobs and faced the bamboo ceiling that their parents had faced. They then realized how we managed to be prudent with our money and leapfrogged into UMC, even when we were underpaid and plied with more work than others. All of a sudden, they were proud of our accented English and stopped correcting us.

Their devotion towards us came when we were willing to sacrifice our money and leisure time willingly to take care of grandkids and provide real help to our children to grow their career and have a balanced life without worry for their children. They wanted us to speak in our native tongue to our grandkids and reclaim the language that was lost because we all were trying to fit in.

You reap what you sow. Your kids are human beings who were born to be loved and nurtured. What did you do for them? Just giving birth is not enough. When parents are loving, kind and nurturing - why won't their kids have respect and gratitude towards them?

This made me tear up — reminded me of my own (Asian) parents.

I'm sure Asian kids too can blame their parents for many things but no one can deny the sacrifices Asian & South Asian parents make for their families, specially their children.

Anonymous wrote: Yes, it seems it is a foreign concept. I am Asian who immigrated here. My kids had a happy, well adjusted, pampered childhood and they were always well behaved and respectful to us and their teachers because that was our home environment and culture.

But their heartfelt gratitude towards us came when they went to college and realized that their peers had really selfish parents, neglected childhoods, few memories of delicious hot family meals and general anxiety about life and their future. That their parents did not pay for their college, that they did not want to be bothered by their kids struggles. It is "18 and you are out". Many parents 'downsized' when kids left for college, many divorced, many converted the kids bedrooms into their hobby rooms.

Their respect towards us came when they started jobs and faced the bamboo ceiling that their parents had faced. They then realized how we managed to be prudent with our money and leapfrogged into UMC, even when we were underpaid and plied with more work than others. All of a sudden, they were proud of our accented English and stopped correcting us.

Their devotion towards us came when we were willing to sacrifice our money and leisure time willingly to take care of grandkids and provide real help to our children to grow their career and have a balanced life without worry for their children. They wanted us to speak in our native tongue to our grandkids and reclaim the language that was lost because we all were trying to fit in.

You reap what you sow. Your kids are human beings who were born to be loved and nurtured. What did you do for them? Just giving birth is not enough. When parents are loving, kind and nurturing - why won't their kids have respect and gratitude towards them?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Yes, it seems it is a foreign concept. I am Asian who immigrated here. My kids had a happy, well adjusted, pampered childhood and they were always well behaved and respectful to us and their teachers because that was our home environment and culture.

But their heartfelt gratitude towards us came when they went to college and realized that their peers had really selfish parents, neglected childhoods, few memories of delicious hot family meals and general anxiety about life and their future. That their parents did not pay for their college, that they did not want to be bothered by their kids struggles. It is "18 and you are out". Many parents 'downsized' when kids left for college, many divorced, many converted the kids bedrooms into their hobby rooms.

Their respect towards us came when they started jobs and faced the bamboo ceiling that their parents had faced. They then realized how we managed to be prudent with our money and leapfrogged into UMC, even when we were underpaid and plied with more work than others. All of a sudden, they were proud of our accented English and stopped correcting us.

Their devotion towards us came when we were willing to sacrifice our money and leisure time willingly to take care of grandkids and provide real help to our children to grow their career and have a balanced life without worry for their children. They wanted us to speak in our native tongue to our grandkids and reclaim the language that was lost because we all were trying to fit in.

You reap what you sow. Your kids are human beings who were born to be loved and nurtured. What did you do for them? Just giving birth is not enough. When parents are loving, kind and nurturing - why won't their kids have respect and gratitude towards them?

This made me tear up — reminded me of my own (Asian) parents.

I'm sure Asian kids too can blame their parents for many things but no one can deny the sacrifices Asian & South Asian parents make for their families, specially their children.

Which is really admirable yet in some ways very unhealthy as it comes with reciprocal expectations.

Reciprocal expectations are healthy. Tradition is healthy. Unmitigated individualism is unhealthy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Apparently respecting your elders is a foreign concept. ACs should be grateful to their parents and pay them respect. They owe them respect.

Lol. Yes, the whole “millennials want an apology and their parents want a thank you” paradox.

I’ve never heard this… why do millennials want an apology?

Anonymous wrote:
Respect is earned.