Anonymous wrote:This is an extreme example but maybe a cautionary tale if the least expensive isn't just a reasonably priced public or a good merit offer from a National level LAC that is lower in the USNWR rankings: One of our friends (in the Midwest, not DMV) made her kid go to the least expensive school--it was truly a no-name place, out of state but a regional college that offered her a near full-ride and an opportunity to play her sport. I don't even know how they found the place. I'm not sure if the school is even ranked in the USNWR and isn't included among Princeton Review schools. It was a terrible decision---the education was sup-par, practices for a dead-end team took up a lot of time and she lost interest and motivation in the sport. The school was clearly on the financial edge and there were few amenities. She did okay in classes but not stellar because she pretty much hated everything. The school turned out to be a 'suitcase school' so not much social life. Her mom made her stick it out for two years, but then she dropped out. She is now at community college and says the classes are far more organized and challenging than her other school. She now has to drag this transcript with her that looks bad. She initially got into reasonably-priced in-state schools when she applied as a freshman, but the full-ride was tempting to her family I guess. It's ending up costing a lot of lost time, motivation and money and will likely drag on her opportunities. So while I think being attentive to costs is important, choosing the least expensive option might not always be.

Anonymous wrote:I think setting that expectation was the job for two years ago. Did you give your student a budget? Do other schools fall within that budget?

I think you are setting yourself up for a lot of resentment if you say “Great job getting those merit scholarships to Welcoming SLAC and Awesome Flagship, but Dad and I decided you are going to Last Choice Safety. Hey, you picked that school to add to your list (after we insisted you needed a safety), so really, this was your choice.”

Anonymous wrote:It depends on OP's finances, but I think such a kid seems entitled if they expect the parents to pay beaucoup bucks for a college degree. Some of these colleges cost more than the median salary. That's insane.

OP has two other kids. What would they tell the other kids when it's time for them to go to college?

I get it, OP. My DC worked their butt off in HS. Graduating in a magnet program 4.0 uwgpa, very high SAT scores. DC applied to flagship in state as well as OOS and fancy private. DC will most likely go in state honors college that has a very good reputation in the industry because it's soo much cheaper (merit aid) AND the reputation is solid. DC will easily be able to find a good paying job after graduation. The money we save will also allow DC to go to graduate school possibly fully paid by us.

My DC told me that a lot of the reasons why kids want to go to these fancy elite schools is due to ego, and that does include DC. I told DC I'm not paying $320K for your ego. Instead, I'll buy you a car for $32K after you graduate.

The best gift you can give your college aged kid is to have them graduate without any loans, and for the parents to be financially independent in retirement and not have to rely on their kids.

Anonymous wrote:DS is attending his least expensive option but it was, fortunately, also his first choice -- Virginia Tech.

DD is not attending the least expensive, that would have been UMW for $17k. But her LAC at about $30k is still well within budget.

Neither kid applied to schools we knew had no chance of coming in under the maximum we were willing to pay.

Anonymous wrote:We are on the verge of making a decision with our graduating HS senior, and he has many offers with varying merit aid offers (mostly public, but some privates) and because money is an issue for us, we would of course like him to attend the school that costs us the least over 4 years. Yes, these schools all offer different majors and school atmosphere and all that, but at the end of the day we as parents look at it like our child needs to make the best out of whatever situation they are being given, and if one school offers him a great package because he worked hard in HS and got great grades and besides it was him who chose to apply to these schools in the first place (even if some of these were likelies or safeties or whatever) he should attend whatever helps us pay the least. I'm not sure he necessarily sees it that way, but I'm also not sure it should be up to him to decide since he's not paying $ for it. Keeping in mind he's the oldest and we will have two kids behind him, one in college at the same time, I really need to set this expectation that college is what you put into it, wherever you go, but I'm not sure kids these days are being told that. I'm really asking this question not for those who have saved for college in full, but for anyone who is not... did you ever make this decision with your child and how did that go?

Anonymous wrote:This is an extreme example but maybe a cautionary tale if the least expensive isn't just a reasonably priced public or a good merit offer from a National level LAC that is lower in the USNWR rankings: One of our friends (in the Midwest, not DMV) made her kid go to the least expensive school--it was truly a no-name place, out of state but a regional college that offered her a near full-ride and an opportunity to play her sport. I don't even know how they found the place. I'm not sure if the school is even ranked in the USNWR and isn't included among Princeton Review schools. It was a terrible decision---the education was sup-par, practices for a dead-end team took up a lot of time and she lost interest and motivation in the sport. The school was clearly on the financial edge and there were few amenities. She did okay in classes but not stellar because she pretty much hated everything. The school turned out to be a 'suitcase school' so not much social life. Her mom made her stick it out for two years, but then she dropped out. She is now at community college and says the classes are far more organized and challenging than her other school. She now has to drag this transcript with her that looks bad. She initially got into reasonably-priced in-state schools when she applied as a freshman, but the full-ride was tempting to her family I guess. It's ending up costing a lot of lost time, motivation and money and will likely drag on her opportunities. So while I think being attentive to costs is important, choosing the least expensive option might not always be.

Anonymous wrote:We did not choose the least expensive option for my oldest daughter, nor are we likely to do so for our current HS senior. But...we did/are choosing an option that was in budget that had the best fit for our children for their major, academically, socially, etc.

For my oldest daughter's case, her cheapest school was an in-state school that's kind of in the middle of nowhere, with little diversity. And while it had her major, we did not think there would be good internship opportunities. She really only applied to go there if she did not get in anywhere else. On the other end, she also applied to a "reach" school that she loved that is expensive and not known for giving good merit. I told her that unless the unlikely merit came back for her, it wasn't going to be an option because we had a budget we had set for college. As expected, it did not. So we picked the best school within our budget that met all of her and our important requirements and was a good fit. She absolutely loves it there and is thriving.

The situation is the same with my current senior. She has 4 options. One is in-state and is the absolute cheapest (about $12K/year cheaper than the next cheapest) and actually would be a decent fit. One is out-of-state (her favorite!), is twice the price of in-state option and not known for giving good merit, and they didn't. The other two options are within our budget (out of state with good merit) and both fall about midway in cost between the cheapest and most expensive.

All are pretty equal academically. We have ruled out the most expensive one, but are willing to pay for any of the other three because they are all within the set budget that she knew about before she started applying. It would be nice for her to take the cheapest one but it is unlikely as she wants to leave the state and spread her wings, and we are good with that. We would not have gone out of budget for that for her and she knows that because we were pretty firm before the whole application process that we had $xx to spend on college.

Good luck!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. My eldest went to Purdue. He would have gone to Tech if we had made it about money. We had purchased the prepaid tuition at a much lower cost. He did extremely well at Purdue and had a group of friends for the first time in his life. He is now working in a great job and has a great life. When we visited both campuses, there was something that made it seem a better place for him. It was such a positive experience.

That's great, though of course you'll never know if he could have had all of that and more at Tech. There's just no way of knowing.

No, but so many kids come from NOVA that there is a chance that he would have faced the kind of exclusion and bullying he received in K-12.