I did first natural and second with an epidural. I never felt pressured whatsoever to have an epidural. I wasn’t a screamer, though. I will say I thought the L&D nurses, the OB’s, the pediatrician’s, and lactation consultants were all operating at one (very high) level of care, knowledge, and communication skills. The postpartum nurses on the other hand…I thought they seemed likely to be the ones rejected from literally every other ward in the hospital. The “cattiness” was palpable and I overheard many a snide remark in “public” areas. They also did not seem as well-educated as the above group and no real sense of mission. They ignore call buttons, ignore doctor’s orders, and just endlessly chit chat at the nurse’s station. I was highly mobile and feeling fine after both of mine so I witnessed this first hand. I have nothing but positive things to say, though, about the first group I listed.

This TikTok gives ME the ick and tremendous anxiety about giving birth (I’m due in March). This is my third baby but my first time delivering in a standard-issue, American hospital (first was born in a birthing center, where I received extraordinarily patient and compassionate care; second was born in a European hospital which was very hands off). I am anxious about being pushed into using an epidural- have been drug free without incident for both previous births - or about stating my boundaries at all. Apparently this makes me a PITA?

Birth is truly a sacred act and should be treated as such. I work in healthcare in a non-clinical role and see how depersonalized everything is. I understand this is done to protect the psyches of clinical staff, but boy does it result in suboptimal outcomes. With a mini-baby boom going on coupled with the nursing shortage, I know they’re having a hard time. There’s just no quick or easy solution to compassion fatigue.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a veteran ICU nurse.

Then you all really, really don't want to know what we say about you family members of the critically ill -- out of earshot.

Their mistake was blabbering in a showy public way.

I know you all have a stressful job, but you have no right to mock and criticize people who are trying their best to navigate a stressful situation, even if their behavior appears inappropriate to you. Find a new line of work.

Actually, we do have that right. Free speech and all.

Ummm... you can have free speech as an unemployed person.

Look, if every nurse or physician was fired for talking bad about patient families then there would be no nurses or physicians left.

Nope. I know some wonderful people in the medical profession who do not talk trash about the people they care for. You just run with a terrible crowd.

Alright, you keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better. Just know if you’re in critical care and your family member is acting a fool, the whole floor has heard about it at the break room or nurse’s station.

As long as (1) it doesn’t impact my care, and (2) it doesn’t get back to me, I don’t care.

The most alarming thing from the TikTok to me is the comment about epidurals. That nurse is complaining about patients who are asserting a right to refuse the most invasive form of pain management because doing do makes her job harder. If that’s how you feel, you should not be an L&D nurse (or maybe a nurse at all).

I had an epidural, by the way. Loved it. But it was my choice and if for whatever reason I’d decided against it, I would expect the nurse to roll with it and to be educated in other methods for pain management.

You obviously weren't on a ward with a woman doing natural birth. I had 8 hours of listening to her scream. As a patient, it was the most horrific experience. I have 0 respect for anyone that puts so many people through her pain.

+1

She needs to do that at home. There are women who are laboring to reliever stillborn babies or babies expected to live only hours who aren’t screaming their heads off. Have some consideration for others.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Those nurses are skummy and unprofessional and should be fired. Someone in the clinical job I am very embarrassed for them.

They have been fired.

Good. Hope they aren’t easily rehired.

They will be. We have a nursing shortage and are dealing with a triple respiratory illness epidemic this winter.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a veteran ICU nurse.

Then you all really, really don't want to know what we say about you family members of the critically ill -- out of earshot.

Their mistake was blabbering in a showy public way.

I know you all have a stressful job, but you have no right to mock and criticize people who are trying their best to navigate a stressful situation, even if their behavior appears inappropriate to you. Find a new line of work.

Actually, we do have that right. Free speech and all.

Ummm... you can have free speech as an unemployed person.

Look, if every nurse or physician was fired for talking bad about patient families then there would be no nurses or physicians left.

Nope. I know some wonderful people in the medical profession who do not talk trash about the people they care for. You just run with a terrible crowd.

Alright, you keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better. Just know if you’re in critical care and your family member is acting a fool, the whole floor has heard about it at the break room or nurse’s station.

NP. And that’s fine, because the break room is a private space accessible to only a few people, it is not public on the Internet.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a veteran ICU nurse.

Then you all really, really don't want to know what we say about you family members of the critically ill -- out of earshot.

Their mistake was blabbering in a showy public way.

I know you all have a stressful job, but you have no right to mock and criticize people who are trying their best to navigate a stressful situation, even if their behavior appears inappropriate to you. Find a new line of work.

I completely disagree. People have a right to their thoughts and feelings.

I am free to have “thoughts and feelings” about my job. The second I go on a public platform and complain about my clients in a way that easily identifies my employer is the second I deserve to be fired.

See the difference between having “thoughts and feelings” and airing them publicly vs. venting about it to coworkers, friends and family in private conversations?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a veteran ICU nurse.

Then you all really, really don't want to know what we say about you family members of the critically ill -- out of earshot.

Their mistake was blabbering in a showy public way.

I know you all have a stressful job, but you have no right to mock and criticize people who are trying their best to navigate a stressful situation, even if their behavior appears inappropriate to you. Find a new line of work.

Actually, we do have that right. Free speech and all.

Ummm... you can have free speech as an unemployed person.

Look, if every nurse or physician was fired for talking bad about patient families then there would be no nurses or physicians left.

Nope. I know some wonderful people in the medical profession who do not talk trash about the people they care for. You just run with a terrible crowd.

Alright, you keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better. Just know if you’re in critical care and your family member is acting a fool, the whole floor has heard about it at the break room or nurse’s station.

As long as (1) it doesn’t impact my care, and (2) it doesn’t get back to me, I don’t care.

The most alarming thing from the TikTok to me is the comment about epidurals. That nurse is complaining about patients who are asserting a right to refuse the most invasive form of pain management because doing do makes her job harder. If that’s how you feel, you should not be an L&D nurse (or maybe a nurse at all).

I had an epidural, by the way. Loved it. But it was my choice and if for whatever reason I’d decided against it, I would expect the nurse to roll with it and to be educated in other methods for pain management.

You obviously weren't on a ward with a woman doing natural birth. I had 8 hours of listening to her scream. As a patient, it was the most horrific experience. I have 0 respect for anyone that puts so many people through her pain.

Anonymous wrote:Okay? Sounds like you may need to work through the issues surrounding your traumatic birth (which no one asked you to describe here) and avoid social media about nurses and L&D. Seems easy enough.

+1. Get some therapy and stay away from triggering social media. Don’t relive this experience by seeking out triggers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a veteran ICU nurse.

Then you all really, really don't want to know what we say about you family members of the critically ill -- out of earshot.

Their mistake was blabbering in a showy public way.

I know you all have a stressful job, but you have no right to mock and criticize people who are trying their best to navigate a stressful situation, even if their behavior appears inappropriate to you. Find a new line of work.

Actually, we do have that right. Free speech and all.

Ummm... you can have free speech as an unemployed person.

Look, if every nurse or physician was fired for talking bad about patient families then there would be no nurses or physicians left.

Nope. I know some wonderful people in the medical profession who do not talk trash about the people they care for. You just run with a terrible crowd.

Alright, you keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better. Just know if you’re in critical care and your family member is acting a fool, the whole floor has heard about it at the break room or nurse’s station.

As long as (1) it doesn’t impact my care, and (2) it doesn’t get back to me, I don’t care.

The most alarming thing from the TikTok to me is the comment about epidurals. That nurse is complaining about patients who are asserting a right to refuse the most invasive form of pain management because doing do makes her job harder. If that’s how you feel, you should not be an L&D nurse (or maybe a nurse at all).

I had an epidural, by the way. Loved it. But it was my choice and if for whatever reason I’d decided against it, I would expect the nurse to roll with it and to be educated in other methods for pain management.

I know that L&D nurses talk crap about their patients because I heard them doing it right next to the ice machine that the patients use to get their own ice. What kind of immature idiot does that? I told them so when I checked out of the hospital.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a veteran ICU nurse.

Then you all really, really don't want to know what we say about you family members of the critically ill -- out of earshot.

Their mistake was blabbering in a showy public way.

I know you all have a stressful job, but you have no right to mock and criticize people who are trying their best to navigate a stressful situation, even if their behavior appears inappropriate to you. Find a new line of work.

Actually, we do have that right. Free speech and all.

Ummm... you can have free speech as an unemployed person.

Look, if every nurse or physician was fired for talking bad about patient families then there would be no nurses or physicians left.

Nope. I know some wonderful people in the medical profession who do not talk trash about the people they care for. You just run with a terrible crowd.

Alright, you keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better. Just know if you’re in critical care and your family member is acting a fool, the whole floor has heard about it at the break room or nurse’s station.

Np which is totally okay. People deserve their feelings.

My mom was a labor and delivery nurse. She seriously judged women’s pain tolerances, how well they pushed and how whiny they were. I see her side and understand her need to have feelings about work that she deeply loved. She made comments about my first birth that I didn’t like- about how much pain I was feeling, about how well I held my legs while I pushed and how I should just give up and just get a c section- she wanted to see her grandkid. She didn’t get to see #2 and #3 born. I love her but I don’t want to be judged like that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a veteran ICU nurse.

Then you all really, really don't want to know what we say about you family members of the critically ill -- out of earshot.

Their mistake was blabbering in a showy public way.

I know you all have a stressful job, but you have no right to mock and criticize people who are trying their best to navigate a stressful situation, even if their behavior appears inappropriate to you. Find a new line of work.

Actually, we do have that right. Free speech and all.

Ummm... you can have free speech as an unemployed person.

Look, if every nurse or physician was fired for talking bad about patient families then there would be no nurses or physicians left.

Nope. I know some wonderful people in the medical profession who do not talk trash about the people they care for. You just run with a terrible crowd.

Alright, you keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better. Just know if you’re in critical care and your family member is acting a fool, the whole floor has heard about it at the break room or nurse’s station.

Anonymous wrote:I am a veteran ICU nurse.

Then you all really, really don't want to know what we say about you family members of the critically ill -- out of earshot.

Their mistake was blabbering in a showy public way.

So, obviously different but somewhat same vein, I was a special ed teacher for many years. I could understand some medical professionals when they said sometimes they just had to 'turn it off' because if you had extreme feelings of empathy for every person/situation/etc you would never last due to burn out. I also would joke around with select staff about various parents etc in PRIVATE. It would never occur to me in a million years to make a social media post about anything of the sort.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a veteran ICU nurse.

Then you all really, really don't want to know what we say about you family members of the critically ill -- out of earshot.

Their mistake was blabbering in a showy public way.

I know you all have a stressful job, but you have no right to mock and criticize people who are trying their best to navigate a stressful situation, even if their behavior appears inappropriate to you. Find a new line of work.

I completely disagree. People have a right to their thoughts and feelings.