We flirt with the idea at DHs all in $280k ($175k for me) We’ve both been expressing regret at not having one parent stay at home (kids are 5 and 2). The rush rush lifestyle and trying to fit in activities and see the kids for more than a couple of hours a day is harder than I expected. Could we do it? Yes. But it would be a big lifestyle change I’m not prepared for. Catholic school, much needed bigger house etc might not be in the cards.

We could live on my spouse's income now that he's at $300k. But he'd have to work til 65 at least. With me working as well, we're hoping it buys us both a decade of retirement. I'd rather work together and retire together at 55, than stay at home and wait for him to retire 10+ years later.

Anonymous wrote:Don't stay at home spouses realize they are losing out on retirement savings like 401k + Employer match?

I’m not a SAHM partially for this reason, but yes, I imagine they do. They are choosing to raise their kids full time.

My DH makes almost $600k but I still work because I want to

Don't stay at home spouses realize they are losing out on retirement savings like 401k + Employer match?

We do it with around 300k a year. We no longer have a mortgage though. Once youngest of three kids starts elementary school, we’ll be a two working family again.

$100k if there is no childcare expenses. Tight but doable for most families. It comes down to expenses, vacations, car bills, housing etc.

Anonymous wrote:No private schools, $400k.

+1.

Anonymous wrote:$125K+ It really depends on your expenses.

This was my family and with 3 little kids. That said, we didn’t have a nanny, house cleaner, and were fairly frugal in terms of vacations, eating out, etc. There is not one answer to this question… it totally depends on what your standards are and what kind of lifestyle you’re trying to support. If you want to afford childcare, luxurious vacations, a big mortgage, and lots of expensive extras you’d need way more than what we had.

I was a SAHM with an HHI of 75K. I think it is entirely doable with some budgeting at $100K. However, we are not talking about having an UMC lifestyle with that. An MC lifestyle is very possible. You do have to make some economic choices though. I pride myself in being a good wife and I could really stretch our dollars.

By $150K, we were living a very good lifestyle and so I think most people can live comfortably on $150K and also save for retirement and college.

We have never had student debt, childcare costs, private school costs, high mortgage, divorce, alimony, child support, fertility treatment, SN kids, pets, eldercare, therapy, marriage counseling, court cases, bankruptcy, major health problems, drinking/drugs/gambling/smoking/prostitution kind of expensive bad habits. First and only marriage for both of us. No kids from previous relationships. Our fixed expenses were always very low.

Depends on your lifestyle, priorities, and what you’re willing to sacrifice. If you have high expenses and insist on fully funding retirement, savings, 529s etc, going on vacations, buying non-necessities, etc then you will need far more. We did it on under $100K when our 2 kids were small.

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s actually the other way around for most people. There is an income below which it doesn’t make sense for both parents to be working. If one or both parents is making less than probably $40 or $50k a year, financial whoever makes the least should stay home.

At the higher ends, it’s all personal preference.

+1. I make 200k. Spouse could make 40-50k but after taxes, what’s the point. It’s so much better to be SAH and spouse takes care of everything in home and picking up our DS, takes him to activities, etc..

My brother told his wife to keep working to set the example for their daughters. She was a teacher and they paid more than her salary for childcare and house keeping. His wife quit her job. I guess we know who holds the power.

If she has a trust fund that at minimum, gives her allowance to cover her monthly expenses.

I quit when our first was born and DH was making about 450k. Immediately regretted it, not for the money but the family dynamics. Went back part time.