Anonymous wrote:I'm not trying to be funny, but if your kids are in school, what do you do all day? I've been on vacation all of this week, and LOVING it. Wishing I didn't have to go back. But, now that it's the end of the week, I'm wondering what would I be doing if this was my way of life? I feel like I'd run out of money & things to do.

Just curious....

I'm a SAHM, and volunteering takes a ton of my time (two schools, church, not-for-profit). Driving my kids to after-school activities and playdates, or being with them at home after school to help with homework, etc., is another big chunk of my day. I go to all their soccer games, dance recitals, band concerts, field trips, class parties, etc. The rest is all the household stuff that takes up anyone's time: tidying and housekeeping chores, laundry, cooking, paying bills, monitoring investments, troubleshooting computers and electronics, family cards and bday gifts, planning birthday parties, dinner parties (we have way more than most people), family scheduling, doctor appointments, vet appointments, buying whatever the family needs in the way of clothes, school supplies, household supplies, drugstore stuff, figuring out what to do with all the kids' art projects and school papers, occasional exciting projects like organizing closets. I consider it a good day if a find time for a walk, let alone real exercise. It is nothing like vacation. And I honestly wonder how WOH moms with demanding jobs manage to hold it all together.

Reading this thread makes me envious of fathers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We all realize of course that this is a conversation of women of privilege. We live in this rarified educated world of choices: "It's MY choice to stay home"... "It's MY choice to work"....

"Bringing home a paycheck" is not just for a "sense of accomplishment" as a PP stated. For many women it's to keep a roof over her family's head and food on the table.

Gimme a break. The sanctimonious attitudes from both sides is ridiculous. Realize that most people don't live in this world.

I posted, not long ago, about doing little else but taking my special needs child. At this point, because of his unusual condition, I have to keep him home with me. He can have violent outbursts and be a danger to other children. When I tried to get early interventions for him the testing was done on a good day and he missed the cut off because he was too intelligent. I have struggled to get him into see the right kind of professionals but his disorder is so rare in children his age that no one would see him and it took 6 months of phone calls to find someone to even treat him and this provider has no real idea how to do it so now we are trying to get him into treatment studies.

I have no choice but to stay home. My job is taking care of my child and making sure he is getting all the help he can.

You are clearly head and shoulders above the intention of this thread! I'm embarassed for everyone on here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:as a sahm I sit around and think about how lucky am NOT to be a working mom

Got someone else payin your bills, huh? What a sense of accomplishment you must feel!

That's pretty mean. FWIW, I have yet to find a job that gives me the same "sense of accomplishment" as taking care of my family.

I completely agree -I bring home 6 figures, but if we could make it on just my DH's salary, I would gladly throw in the towel. Being a part of my daughter's upbringing had brought me far more satisfaction than bringing home that paycheck.

meant to say "has brought me far more satisfaction." Tired mom brain tonight.

Where I live, it is a necessity to stay at home. Daycare costs are pretty high but there are few jobs to be found. My friends and I are all college educated and 2 out of 4 of them lost their jobs and 1 of them has been looking for a job for more than a year. We stay at home because it makes financial sense.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:as a sahm I sit around and think about how lucky am NOT to be a working mom

Got someone else payin your bills, huh? What a sense of accomplishment you must feel!

That's pretty mean. FWIW, I have yet to find a job that gives me the same "sense of accomplishment" as taking care of my family.

I completely agree -I bring home 6 figures, but if we could make it on just my DH's salary, I would gladly throw in the towel. Being a part of my daughter's upbringing had brought me far more satisfaction than bringing home that paycheck.

Anonymous wrote:We all realize of course that this is a conversation of women of privilege. We live in this rarified educated world of choices: "It's MY choice to stay home"... "It's MY choice to work"....

"Bringing home a paycheck" is not just for a "sense of accomplishment" as a PP stated. For many women it's to keep a roof over her family's head and food on the table.

Gimme a break. The sanctimonious attitudes from both sides is ridiculous. Realize that most people don't live in this world.

I posted, not long ago, about doing little else but taking my special needs child. At this point, because of his unusual condition, I have to keep him home with me. He can have violent outbursts and be a danger to other children. When I tried to get early interventions for him the testing was done on a good day and he missed the cut off because he was too intelligent. I have struggled to get him into see the right kind of professionals but his disorder is so rare in children his age that no one would see him and it took 6 months of phone calls to find someone to even treat him and this provider has no real idea how to do it so now we are trying to get him into treatment studies.

I have no choice but to stay home. My job is taking care of my child and making sure he is getting all the help he can.

I work FT with baby but i am very grateful for all the SAHMs whatever age their kids. Most do help out in schools, sports teams etc. and even if they don't, not like my working life in front of the computer is so difficult. (and i am in a high paying, 'demanding' job, which is far less tiring than my evenings and weekend with the kid.

Anonymous wrote:We all realize of course that this is a conversation of women of privilege. We live in this rarified educated world of choices: "It's MY choice to stay home"... "It's MY choice to work"....

"Bringing home a paycheck" is not just for a "sense of accomplishment" as a PP stated. For many women it's to keep a roof over her family's head and food on the table.

Gimme a break. The sanctimonious attitudes from both sides is ridiculous. Realize that most people don't live in this world.

I agree that it is a privilege to stay home, but I disagree that it's only women of privilege who stay home. My husband and I have made serious sacrifices in our lifestyle and saved saved saved to an extreme for every month of my staying home. I worked 15 hour days while I was pregnant to give myself an opportunity to stay home longer than maternity leave would allow. It is a choice. For some, it's an easier choice to make than for others, but it's not fair to characterize all SAHM as women of privilege. Having said that, I agree with you that both sides on this thread are being defensive and judgmental, which is just ignorant.

Working moms, do you love your job more than your kids?

Anonymous wrote:We all realize of course that this is a conversation of women of privilege. We live in this rarified educated world of choices: "It's MY choice to stay home"... "It's MY choice to work"....

"Bringing home a paycheck" is not just for a "sense of accomplishment" as a PP stated. For many women it's to keep a roof over her family's head and food on the table.

Gimme a break. The sanctimonious attitudes from both sides is ridiculous. Realize that most people don't live in this world.

I realize this every minute of every day. That's why I'm so thankful to be able to be a sahm.

Anonymous wrote:We all realize of course that this is a conversation of women of privilege. We live in this rarified educated world of choices: "It's MY choice to stay home"... "It's MY choice to work"....

"Bringing home a paycheck" is not just for a "sense of accomplishment" as a PP stated. For many women it's to keep a roof over her family's head and food on the table.

Gimme a break. The sanctimonious attitudes from both sides is ridiculous. Realize that most people don't live in this world.

You are correct, but this is the panel being asked the question.

We all realize of course that this is a conversation of women of privilege. We live in this rarified educated world of choices: "It's MY choice to stay home"... "It's MY choice to work"....

"Bringing home a paycheck" is not just for a "sense of accomplishment" as a PP stated. For many women it's to keep a roof over her family's head and food on the table.

Gimme a break. The sanctimonious attitudes from both sides is ridiculous. Realize that most people don't live in this world.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:as a sahm I sit around and think about how lucky am NOT to be a working mom

Got someone else payin your bills, huh? What a sense of accomplishment you must feel!

That's pretty mean. FWIW, I have yet to find a job that gives me the same "sense of accomplishment" as taking care of my family.

SAHM's end up doing the vast majority of unpaid labor at schools, drive their kids and those of working moms to sports/activities. Watch where their kids go afterschool -- guess whose houses have parties, hang-outs, "chill" sessions?

FYI many full timers cut back to part-time when the kids are in middle and high school. Some retire.