Anonymous wrote:If you are doing science / math / engineering like I did, you will absolutely be spending lots of time in the library or your room studying. It will be a job. And most of the other students in your program will be like that, too.

This is correct, but it is wise do try to get to know at least some other students in your major for study groups and such like. Someone majoring in science, math, or engineering will need to work at it as if it were a job in order to succeed at any university. Start the homework as soon as its assigned, so you can get help from faculty or TAs during office hours. Do all the homework, even optional ungraded bits. Working many many problems is the best way (maybe the only way) to do well in these fields. Even Feynman (who literally was a Nobel prize genius for QED) did not solo his way through MIT, which was made clear in one of his books.

Btw, I work in scientific research and probably 70%-80% of the scientists are introverted, some mildly and some extremely. We also have some very good people who are valued, but also are probably somewhere mild on the Autism/Asperger's spectrum.

My gen Z college freshman has a close group of friends but normally goes to class and back to dorm. He does the activities that his other friends organize and belongs to one or two clubs and some hobbies that he spends time on. Does well in school and lined up an internship or two.

Yes, social media hypes up the amount of fun people are having and anyways these are curated content. Your job in college is -
- Do well in studies first and foremost
- Look for job and internship opportunities in your area of interest/career. Build up a good resume and remember that the most important thing is to be employable with your college degree.
- Keep away from anything that impacts negatively your health, your reputation and your good academic and moral standing in school. If that makes you slightly boring? So be it. Majority of students are like you. They are not having a wild fun partying time.
- You should try and learn to adult (laundry, cooking, driving, exercising, eating healthy) and be organized.

I think that the one good thing my freshman did was to look for a roommate who was quite, studious, clean, and who did not drink/vape/drugs etc. My kid is more social than his roommate but he found that being around his disciplined roommate has improved his own studying.

Anonymous wrote:SOCIAL MEDIA IS 96% FAKE

I am 100% certain that social media is 95% fake 50% of the time.

Anonymous wrote:Hi

I come from a family that didn’t go to university so I need advice from people who have been to college please .

The university that I’m accepted to has so many different activities and clubs and I checked their online presence and their is just so much of the students hanging out all the time and socializing. So. Much. Socializing. They have podcasts and blogs and people are active there and it’s giving me anxiety. I guess all universities are like this?
But my question is, can’t you be a student who just goes to class and goes back to your dorm? Maybe it’s a stupid question but I spent hours looking at their social media and everyone just seems so connected. It’s too much for me. I don’t want that. I just want to learn, get my degree, talk to students when I have to but that’s it.
Like I want it to be like a job.

Is that weird? Can I do that? Im really anxious. Btw I’m not some grinch or rude to people at all. Im just a really big introvert.

Thank you

One issue here is that you might want to have some activities or student jobs to put on your resume.

A solution: look for activities or jobs, like caring for lab animals, that don’t involve much interaction with other people.

College life is a change, and feeling nervous about a change is normal. However the good news is that, as others have explained, you get to define how you want it to be. No need to come under any kind of pressure to conform to other peoples' expectations.

But one suggestion I would give is to challenge yourself - pursue one activity or join a club which makes you uncomfortable. It will be awkward and scary in the initial days. But the growth you will engender from that experience is something that will stay with you all your life.

Good luck with your college life!

The “college experience” is whatever you want it to be. I lived one year in a dorm and it wasn’t for me. This was before social media but all of those people around all of the time made me anxious. I didn’t know I was an introvert until the.

After that I moved off campus and only went there for class. I actually became more social when I had time alone, away from people.

I know lots of people who threw themselves into college by joining clubs and sororities. Plenty of others only went there for class and had a complete life outside of school. There is no one way to do it!

Anonymous wrote:can’t you be a student who just goes to class and goes back to your dorm? Maybe it’s a stupid question but I spent hours looking at their social media and everyone just seems so connected. It’s too much for me. I don’t want that. I just want to learn, get my degree, talk to students when I have to but that’s it.

If you truly just want to go to class and your room, it might be better to live at home and commute to school. If you are going to live on campus I agree with all the pp that said
- at a minimum you should join something related to what you may want to do in the real world
- networking can be helpful - I got my first job because someone I know encouraged me to get to know one of the deans and the dean told me about an opportunity that I ended up applying to. I also met some of my close friends via someone I met at a student organization. Don’t pursue something that isn’t organic (like you won’t catch me joining the hiking club because I don’t like the outdoors) but figure out what things you are interested in and see if there is an organization with people with similar interests. I liked the suggestions of service organizations and/or something where you get exercise if either of those things interest you.
- I agree with all the posters that said it’s better to study outside the room BUT if you really do better studying in the room make sure you match to a roommate where they don’t care or they are the same and aren’t bothered if you are both there studying.
- don’t underestimate the social outlet/getting out of the room by having a campus job AND it can help with job references and getting other jobs. While I didn’t have a campus job that had the camaraderie of other students, I kept up with my supervisor for years after graduating and they were definitely a reference for internships and that first post college job.
- if you don’t like social media, use it minimally for what makes sense. For example if people coordinate on whatever app to decide to meet for dinner at the school cafeteria you can just use it for that versus posting about your life.

It’s not healthy to sit in your dorm all day. You will get fat and depressed.

Find an activity related to what you’re studying or a non-academic interest you have.