Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My tween has a lock. She’s only used it once and we read her the riot act. Hadn’t done it since, closed door us enough to ensure privacy.

I clearly lack imagination, but what is inherently wrong with using a lock? If she’s doing drugs behind a locked door, I would think the issue would be the drugs, not the lock.

I'm OP and my kids love to lock their door. It just drives me batty. I knock, they say come in, I try the handle, it's locked, they say oh hold on, and I stand there waiting to ask a simple question. And a couple of times they've accidentally fallen asleep with it locked (they know its not supposed to be locked for sleep, and generally comply).

The house came with locks and now that I need to replace the knobs anyway, I want to not have them. I know they will protest and I'm trying to decide if it's worth putting my foot down.

You’re being too controlling. Your kids use the locks on their existing knobs. There is zero reason to not continue to provide them the privacy they desire.

OP is not controlling at all. They can have privacy with a closed door. It’s doesn’t have to be locked.

Anonymous wrote:Yes! A privacy doorknob “locks,” but you can just pop it open with a Bobby pin, an Allen wrench, whatever. Or it will have a little thing you can turn with a dime or a fingernail. It keeps out siblings and people who forget to knock.

It would be super weird to have bedrooms without a privacy knob. Bathrooms and bedrooms all have privacy knobs.

This! Of course they deserve privacy for when they are changing etc. The doors can easily be opened if need be, been there done that. Its not Fort Knox.

No, we would have to physically put on a knob that locks. We knock, he knocks. After a one or two trial and errors, we've all had to train ourselves to wait for a "come in" (us) or a grunted "yeah" (him).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My tween has a lock. She’s only used it once and we read her the riot act. Hadn’t done it since, closed door us enough to ensure privacy.

I clearly lack imagination, but what is inherently wrong with using a lock? If she’s doing drugs behind a locked door, I would think the issue would be the drugs, not the lock.

I'm OP and my kids love to lock their door. It just drives me batty. I knock, they say come in, I try the handle, it's locked, they say oh hold on, and I stand there waiting to ask a simple question. And a couple of times they've accidentally fallen asleep with it locked (they know its not supposed to be locked for sleep, and generally comply).

The house came with locks and now that I need to replace the knobs anyway, I want to not have them. I know they will protest and I'm trying to decide if it's worth putting my foot down.

You’re being too controlling. Your kids use the locks on their existing knobs. There is zero reason to not continue to provide them the privacy they desire.

+1. This is weird. I understand not wanting kids to sleep behind locked doors, but I don’t understand why you are requiring them to unlock the door when you just want to ask a simple question. Just ask the question through the door. Or leave their laundry/backpack/whatever you were bringing them outside their door. If you want to sit on their bed face-to-face and have a conversation, just say that. If you want to check on them to make sure they’re not doing something dangerous, fine. I don’t understand why asking a simple question has to be face-to-face.

Anonymous wrote:Locks are unnecessary PP here (mostly because I grew up without them — I now think since OP’s kids are used to locks she should keep them!) and I have a question for the locks are necessary crowd: since everyone says their “privacy” locks are so easy to pop, how do they add any additional privacy beyond the clear symbol of a closed door? My family growing up absolutely always knocked and waited for the door to be opened or to invited in before entering — it was always understood that bedrooms were absolutely private space, like bathrooms.

It’s nice that your family always understood that bedrooms are private, and I’m working on that with my new 2 year old, but we’re not there yet. My 7 and 4 year olds respect closed doors, but my 2 year old doesn’t fully respect them yet. My 7 year old works hard on her Legos, and I allow her to use the privacy lock when her 2 year old brother gets interested in looking (which really means touching) them.

Locks are unnecessary PP here (mostly because I grew up without them — I now think since OP’s kids are used to locks she should keep them!) and I have a question for the locks are necessary crowd: since everyone says their “privacy” locks are so easy to pop, how do they add any additional privacy beyond the clear symbol of a closed door? My family growing up absolutely always knocked and waited for the door to be opened or to invited in before entering — it was always understood that bedrooms were absolutely private space, like bathrooms.

I’m getting the sense that some of you don’t know how to pop open a privacy lock.

We keep a little key on top of the doorframes of all the privacy knobs. It’s a little Allen wrench. You can’t see it, but I can use it to pop the lock if my kid or dog accidentally locks one.

I grew up with a lock on the bedroom door and all my kids have locks on their doors. I can easily unlock them with a screwdriver (or even a dime) if I need to.

Why would you want your kids to live in fear that their privacy will be violated? Sure, people are supposed to knock and siblings are supposed to follow the rules. But why give someone the chance to be cruel and invasive if there's a way to stop it.

Our house has them and I never thought about it being a bad thing.

I actually don't know if DS' room has a lock or not. If it is closed, I knock. I'm guessing it doesn't have a lock, but my bedroom door does. They're just the doors that came with the house. I don't like the idea of a lock for safety reasons. A closed door is enough privacy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My tween has a lock. She’s only used it once and we read her the riot act. Hadn’t done it since, closed door us enough to ensure privacy.

I clearly lack imagination, but what is inherently wrong with using a lock? If she’s doing drugs behind a locked door, I would think the issue would be the drugs, not the lock.

I'm OP and my kids love to lock their door. It just drives me batty. I knock, they say come in, I try the handle, it's locked, they say oh hold on, and I stand there waiting to ask a simple question. And a couple of times they've accidentally fallen asleep with it locked (they know its not supposed to be locked for sleep, and generally comply).

The house came with locks and now that I need to replace the knobs anyway, I want to not have them. I know they will protest and I'm trying to decide if it's worth putting my foot down.

You’re being too controlling. Your kids use the locks on their existing knobs. There is zero reason to not continue to provide them the privacy they desire.

All doors in your house should have locks, Heaven forbid an intruder should break in and you don't have locks. Locks could buy you an additional fee minutes.