Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here. I meet up with other dads for drinks/etc. Never with kids. We schedule them at a time when that's easy to do, like 9pm once the kids are in bed.

Why can’t you dads ever take the kids out to laser tag or plan a camping trip or something? Start with something easy like going to the movies. I think it’s really odd when dads don’t take initiative with their kids. My DH and his friends take the kids camping every year while the moms get a night out.

Many women I know do not want a strange man with their kids. They think it is weird if a dad plans outing, play dates or shows interest in kids. I know one mom who will not let their kids in car pool if a dad is driving. The DH taking the kids camping…these mothers would think the DH was a pedophile. Seriously this is really common.

Umm they go camping with other dads. Each dad brings their own kids and they go together. The families are friends, so it’s not just some “strange man.” I think it’s really sad that you find it weird for a dad to drive carpool or plan outings.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH should tell him point blank that he can’t hang out unless it’s with the kids too.

Why? What are you hoping to accomplish here? What will OP win?

And it’s such a bizarre take. “Tell him point blank that he can’t?” She’s neither his boss nor is he her child.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here. I meet up with other dads for drinks/etc. Never with kids. We schedule them at a time when that's easy to do, like 9pm once the kids are in bed.

Why can’t you dads ever take the kids out to laser tag or plan a camping trip or something? Start with something easy like going to the movies. I think it’s really odd when dads don’t take initiative with their kids. My DH and his friends take the kids camping every year while the moms get a night out.

Many women I know do not want a strange man with their kids. They think it is weird if a dad plans outing, play dates or shows interest in kids. I know one mom who will not let their kids in car pool if a dad is driving. The DH taking the kids camping…these mothers would think the DH was a pedophile. Seriously this is really common.

You need new friends. This is not normal.

Anonymous wrote:LOL--you are annoyed that men do not behave like women by creating playgroups and doing activities together with their kids?

You need to find something new to focus on. This is not worth your time.

It’s actually just behaving AS A PARENT. I schedule social time away from my kids (I’m a mom). But I also socialize a lot with my children.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here. I meet up with other dads for drinks/etc. Never with kids. We schedule them at a time when that's easy to do, like 9pm once the kids are in bed.

Why can’t you dads ever take the kids out to laser tag or plan a camping trip or something? Start with something easy like going to the movies. I think it’s really odd when dads don’t take initiative with their kids. My DH and his friends take the kids camping every year while the moms get a night out.

Many women I know do not want a strange man with their kids. They think it is weird if a dad plans outing, play dates or shows interest in kids. I know one mom who will not let their kids in car pool if a dad is driving. The DH taking the kids camping…these mothers would think the DH was a pedophile. Seriously this is really common.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, my husband makes plans to do thing/host with the kids.

Same here. Sometimes he makes plans just with his friends, of course, but he also plans things with another family, including the kids.

+1 to all this.

Some friends he mostly sees without kids, some he sees with kids. But my DH genuinely likes spending time with his friend’s kids. It’d never occur to him to not ever see the kids.

Anonymous wrote:DH here. I meet up with other dads for drinks/etc. Never with kids. We schedule them at a time when that's easy to do, like 9pm once the kids are in bed.

Why can’t you dads ever take the kids out to laser tag or plan a camping trip or something? Start with something easy like going to the movies. I think it’s really odd when dads don’t take initiative with their kids. My DH and his friends take the kids camping every year while the moms get a night out.

Huh, I guess I don’t understand the problem here. I wish my DH had more friends nearby that he could hangout with. Especially with WAH I think we are both isolated and enjoy seeing adult friends. I do occasionally get together with my friends with their kids but the majority of play dates etc are with my kids friends from school, and yes I organize those because I have more time and it seems to be the expectation. I have no issue if a dad brings their child on the play date rather than the mom (this has happened a couple times with the same family) because it’s for the kids.

OP if you want some time to yourself have your DH take the kids some where, it doesn’t have to be with other people.

He sounds like a bum

DH here. I meet up with other dads for drinks/etc. Never with kids. We schedule them at a time when that's easy to do, like 9pm once the kids are in bed.

LOL--you are annoyed that men do not behave like women by creating playgroups and doing activities together with their kids?

You need to find something new to focus on. This is not worth your time.

No never, but my DH doesn't have any friends with kids our sons age. I do have friends with kids my son's age (not my son's friends, my friends) so I do often plan things with the kids involved because i want to see my friends and it's easy to bring the kids along.

My DH is not a social planner in general. But also doesn't have a "dad group" so this is just no a thing at all in our family. I do not begrudge him for it in the least.

If we are invited to a random school party it's 50/50 on who goes. And if it's DH he talks to other parents and is perfectly normal and sociable. He just doesn't go out of his way to initiate it.

I do most the planning and organizing of social activities, I guess b/c most of our kids friends and family friends with kids are through me and other moms. However, my husbands does plan things from time to time with some of his friends and their families. He is also good friends with one other dad and the two of them probably hang out with the kids (and without the moms) once a month.

Your husband is a horrible dad!

Anonymous wrote:DH should tell him point blank that he can’t hang out unless it’s with the kids too.

Why? What are you hoping to accomplish here? What will OP win?